Restroom poetry

[zantac666]

This poetry you would find in te stalls or above the urinals Like.

Here i lie in stinky vapor, because some bastard stole the toilet paper, shall i lie, or shall i linger, or shall i be forced to use my finger.

Some come here to sit and think, some come here to shit and stink, but i come here to scratch my balls, and read the bullshit on the walls.

Now it's your turn.

 

[Saint Peter]

Found in a "Sand-O-let" on a construction site.

"smells so bad in here i can hardly eat my sandwich"

 

[PacificBlue]

Where are you using the bathroom??? *eek*

 

[metal_minx]

found in the girl's bathroom at a local rock club "bassist's have the best fingers" "drummers bang the best skin"

i just thought that was cute

 

[zantac666]

Here i sit, i'm at a loss trying to shit out taco sauce. When it comes, i hope and pray, i don't blow my ass away.

 

[Saint Peter]

Found scratched into the paint on a condom machine in a downtown denver bar

Dont buy this gum....it is too chewy and does not have any flavor

 

[Throbbin_Rod]

"Jesus saves"

underneath which someone else wrote:

"But Gretzky scores on the rebound"



"Unhappiness is a flooded john and a hole in your sneaker."

 

[metal_minx]

Here i sit, i'm at a loss trying to shit out taco sauce. When it comes, i hope and pray, i don't blow my ass away.

lmao thats too funny

 

[zantac666]

(Under a sign that said:"Employees Must Wash Hands")

I waited and waited, but finally washed them myself.

Here i sit all broken harted tried to shit but only farted, Here i sit what a caper i have to shit but i'm out of paper, Your lucky you had your chance i trie to fart, and shit my pats!

 

[zantac666]

Some people come here to take a shit i came here to leave one.

 

[Z-guy]

.....

 

[metal_minx]

lofl

 

[zantac666]

Here i sit on the pooper,
Creating a state trooper.

 

[Nigel]

Can't remember where I read this...but it was next to the urinal:

Piss here,
Piss clear.
Shake your spear,
And disappear.....

and then....this classic...in the men's restroom of my Jr. high school...there was a line drawn on the wall...horizontally....about a foot down from the ceiling. Directly underneath it was written:

If you can piss above this line, The ________ Fire Department needs you......

 

[red_rose]

If you sprinkle when you tinkle,
Be a sweetie and wipe the seatie.





Edited because Nigel was sweet enough to point out my lovely spelling error.

 

[Nigel]

Edited because Nigel was sweet enough to point out my lovely spelling error.

no...cuz I'm an anal retentive spelling freak!

 

[red_rose]

no...cuz I'm an anal retentive spelling freak!

The first step is admitting you have a problem.

Cut me some slack! I haven't been awake this early in well over a month!

 

[Guest]

If black is beautiful.
Then i just shit a masterpiece.

 

[Guest]

Here I sit, broken hearted.
Tried to shit, but only farted.
Then one day, I took a chance.
Tried to fart, and shit my pants.

TB4p

 

[teddybear4play]

Obviously that last one was me.

TB4p

 

[bluespoke]

Its no use standing on the seat

The crabs in here can jump ten feet!

 

[koalabear]

Fighting for peace is like fucking for viginity.

 

[bluespoke]

Fighting for peace is like fucking for viginity.

As distinct from fighting for a piece!

 

[koalabear]

As distinct from fighting for a piece!

From a Nam shitter, thought more of peace then we did piece.