Hello, I'm brand new here, so I apologize in advance for any "newbie" mistakes/assumptions that follow! (Speaking of which, I'm pretty sure this is the right place for this, but please let me know if I'm supposed to be in a different Forum).
I found Literotica a while back and reading some of the stories here inspired me to try to write something of my own. The idea of being able to craft the perfect fantasy appeals to me, especially since I haven't (yet) found anything exactly like what I have in mind.
Unfortunately, I've learned that I'm a pretty terrible writer in general, and because my story idea involves a group setting with multiple participating characters, I am finding that I am not able to properly convert the idea in my mind into text on screen. Thus far, all I have managed to put together is a sort of brainstorming / outline of the story. I'm hopeful that someone with far more talent can, best case, flesh this idea out into a full blown story, or short of that perhaps provide some suggestions on developing this further.
A little set up:
The basic idea of the story is that four 20-something girls decide to surprise their boyfriends with some kind of high-stakes game (probably beer pong, though literally any indoor game works). They play in teams, 2 vs. 2, while their boyfriends cheer them on. The deal is that the losing girls will have to do whatever the winners tell them to, and it's understood going in that this will involve swinging and group sex. Basically, they are quite literally putting their ass on the line.
My goal is to create a story that incorporates a strong reluctance theme, while never crossing the line and becoming non-consensual. So even though there may be reluctance to go through with the deal, the losers will still do so willingly (even having fun and enjoying themselves despite losing). Including a little bit of domination (things like pinning, spanking, being posed in revealing ways, semi-derogatory dirty talk, and somewhat rough sex) is, in my opinion, much hotter, but in my attempts this has always come across as more "rapey" and less "playful fun."
I like the idea of the point of view being one of the losing girl's boyfriends, who will essentially just be watching his girl make good on her lost bet. Not only would he consistently have a view of all of the action, but being on the losing side means the mild reluctance/domination theme would still play well from his POV. To be honest, I never considered trying it from the perspective of one of the female characters, because I'm apparently a completely stereotypical guy who fails miserably at recreating the female mindset in any semblance of a believable way, which carries over into...
I simply cannot write believable, but hot, dialogue for the women. I cannot freaking do it. It always sounds like I ripped off an 80's porn when I read it back to myself. Nothing ruins a good sex scene quite like wonky dialogue...
Anyway, those are the challenges that have led me here. This is a rough overview of how I thought the story should play out (revisions / suggestions would be welcome, provided the themes above are maintained!)
---
I'm not sure if character names are necessary, but I'll include the ones I was using.
Team 1
Nicole (BF: Justin)
Kelly (BF: Josh)
Team 2
Elise (BF: Mark)
Courtney (BF: James)
I prefer the idea that this sort of thing is not a regular occurrence for the characters, so everyone is relatively nervous / exited going in, as it will be a new experience no matter what. I think this also keeps even the stripping component exciting as it will be the first time the rest of the group has seen them naked.
- We come into the story perhaps towards the end of the game, with just enough time to establish what's going on and show some built-up rivalry between the two teams. The game is close and with each round the girls are making comments about what they are going to make the other girls do when they lose (anything from how fun it will be strip them and show them off to the guys on up to something like asking if they want their hair pulled while getting fucked, etc).
- After a few rounds, we reach the end of the game, with Elise & Courtney winning. They spend a few moments gloating over their victory before moving right on to the main event.
- The victors decide that they are going to let their boyfriends enjoy one loser at a time, and decide that Kelly (who perhaps had been the most boisterous during the game) should be the first 'trophy.'
- Courtney and Elise pull Kelly to the middle of the room and put on a show of stripping her down while they pin her arms in the air to preempt any attempt at modesty. Kelly is clearly embarrassed and playfully protests while being stripped.
- Once naked, the winning women enjoy Kelly to themselves for a few moments, perhaps bending her over and taking turns playfully spanking her or perhaps they are more sensual and take some time feeling up and fingering the naked loser while the guys just enjoy the show? The idea of a forced orgasm for an audience seems hot to me, but it's probably a bit early to be believable (or maybe not?) considering Kelly would, at this point, still be adjusting the the idea of even being naked in front of everyone.
- Whatever the case, after spending some time alone with Kelly, the winning team invites their boyfriends to join in, first letting them enjoy feeling her up, fingering her, or maybe posing her however they want to get a better look at her. It doesn't take long for things to progress, though, and soon enough (after a little more protesting / "encouragement") Kelly finds herself on her knees taking turns going down on both guys. (I really like the idea of one of the winning women pressing Kelly's head down onto one of the guys as a way to incorporate more of that light domination element).
- After getting both guys worked up orally, Kelly is reminded that her mouth wasn't the only body part she put on the line, and the winners decide that they want to watch her get taken on her back so everyone can enjoy the view. Further, they decide she should have her hands pinned while each guy has a turn with her. (Here I really like the idea of either her own teammate, Nicole, or her own boyfriend, Josh, being made to pin her while she gets fucked. I think I'd lean more heavily towards Nicole doing so because she knows that she is going to be putting on the same show in just a few minutes).
- After each guy gets his turn with Kelly on her back, they pull her onto her hands and knees and double team her, having her suck on one while the other fucks her from behind, and then swapping.
- At this point, the guys could either cum in/on Kelly, or (perhaps more realistically) they could decide that they need a break so that they can keep going and actually get to enjoy Nicole as well.
- With Nicole's turn, we would see a similar treatment for her, but of course with differences to allow the maximum amount of variety to be incorporated into the action and prevent too much repetition.
- Finally, when Nicole's solo turn is wrapped up, things can end with a more traditional orgy, with Nicole and Kelly fucked in a few positions simultaneously by Mark & James, the end result being that both Nicole & Kelly end up receiving cumshots.
- With their boyfriends sated, Elise & Courtney step in, fully dressed, next to the naked, cum covered losers for a photo to be kept by the winning team as a trophy, with the losers determined to get a rematch to get one of their own, which may work nicely as the basis of a followup story.
Anyway, that's the general idea. What do those of you with more experience (read: everyone) think? Is it potentially workable? I know that not everyone finds this sort of scenario as exciting as I do, but even if no one is interested in writing it out I would love any and all feedback that might help make it a better concept to build on.
Thank you!
I found Literotica a while back and reading some of the stories here inspired me to try to write something of my own. The idea of being able to craft the perfect fantasy appeals to me, especially since I haven't (yet) found anything exactly like what I have in mind.
Unfortunately, I've learned that I'm a pretty terrible writer in general, and because my story idea involves a group setting with multiple participating characters, I am finding that I am not able to properly convert the idea in my mind into text on screen. Thus far, all I have managed to put together is a sort of brainstorming / outline of the story. I'm hopeful that someone with far more talent can, best case, flesh this idea out into a full blown story, or short of that perhaps provide some suggestions on developing this further.
A little set up:
The basic idea of the story is that four 20-something girls decide to surprise their boyfriends with some kind of high-stakes game (probably beer pong, though literally any indoor game works). They play in teams, 2 vs. 2, while their boyfriends cheer them on. The deal is that the losing girls will have to do whatever the winners tell them to, and it's understood going in that this will involve swinging and group sex. Basically, they are quite literally putting their ass on the line.
My goal is to create a story that incorporates a strong reluctance theme, while never crossing the line and becoming non-consensual. So even though there may be reluctance to go through with the deal, the losers will still do so willingly (even having fun and enjoying themselves despite losing). Including a little bit of domination (things like pinning, spanking, being posed in revealing ways, semi-derogatory dirty talk, and somewhat rough sex) is, in my opinion, much hotter, but in my attempts this has always come across as more "rapey" and less "playful fun."
I like the idea of the point of view being one of the losing girl's boyfriends, who will essentially just be watching his girl make good on her lost bet. Not only would he consistently have a view of all of the action, but being on the losing side means the mild reluctance/domination theme would still play well from his POV. To be honest, I never considered trying it from the perspective of one of the female characters, because I'm apparently a completely stereotypical guy who fails miserably at recreating the female mindset in any semblance of a believable way, which carries over into...
I simply cannot write believable, but hot, dialogue for the women. I cannot freaking do it. It always sounds like I ripped off an 80's porn when I read it back to myself. Nothing ruins a good sex scene quite like wonky dialogue...
Anyway, those are the challenges that have led me here. This is a rough overview of how I thought the story should play out (revisions / suggestions would be welcome, provided the themes above are maintained!)
---
I'm not sure if character names are necessary, but I'll include the ones I was using.
Team 1
Nicole (BF: Justin)
Kelly (BF: Josh)
Team 2
Elise (BF: Mark)
Courtney (BF: James)
I prefer the idea that this sort of thing is not a regular occurrence for the characters, so everyone is relatively nervous / exited going in, as it will be a new experience no matter what. I think this also keeps even the stripping component exciting as it will be the first time the rest of the group has seen them naked.
- We come into the story perhaps towards the end of the game, with just enough time to establish what's going on and show some built-up rivalry between the two teams. The game is close and with each round the girls are making comments about what they are going to make the other girls do when they lose (anything from how fun it will be strip them and show them off to the guys on up to something like asking if they want their hair pulled while getting fucked, etc).
- After a few rounds, we reach the end of the game, with Elise & Courtney winning. They spend a few moments gloating over their victory before moving right on to the main event.
- The victors decide that they are going to let their boyfriends enjoy one loser at a time, and decide that Kelly (who perhaps had been the most boisterous during the game) should be the first 'trophy.'
- Courtney and Elise pull Kelly to the middle of the room and put on a show of stripping her down while they pin her arms in the air to preempt any attempt at modesty. Kelly is clearly embarrassed and playfully protests while being stripped.
- Once naked, the winning women enjoy Kelly to themselves for a few moments, perhaps bending her over and taking turns playfully spanking her or perhaps they are more sensual and take some time feeling up and fingering the naked loser while the guys just enjoy the show? The idea of a forced orgasm for an audience seems hot to me, but it's probably a bit early to be believable (or maybe not?) considering Kelly would, at this point, still be adjusting the the idea of even being naked in front of everyone.
- Whatever the case, after spending some time alone with Kelly, the winning team invites their boyfriends to join in, first letting them enjoy feeling her up, fingering her, or maybe posing her however they want to get a better look at her. It doesn't take long for things to progress, though, and soon enough (after a little more protesting / "encouragement") Kelly finds herself on her knees taking turns going down on both guys. (I really like the idea of one of the winning women pressing Kelly's head down onto one of the guys as a way to incorporate more of that light domination element).
- After getting both guys worked up orally, Kelly is reminded that her mouth wasn't the only body part she put on the line, and the winners decide that they want to watch her get taken on her back so everyone can enjoy the view. Further, they decide she should have her hands pinned while each guy has a turn with her. (Here I really like the idea of either her own teammate, Nicole, or her own boyfriend, Josh, being made to pin her while she gets fucked. I think I'd lean more heavily towards Nicole doing so because she knows that she is going to be putting on the same show in just a few minutes).
- After each guy gets his turn with Kelly on her back, they pull her onto her hands and knees and double team her, having her suck on one while the other fucks her from behind, and then swapping.
- At this point, the guys could either cum in/on Kelly, or (perhaps more realistically) they could decide that they need a break so that they can keep going and actually get to enjoy Nicole as well.
- With Nicole's turn, we would see a similar treatment for her, but of course with differences to allow the maximum amount of variety to be incorporated into the action and prevent too much repetition.
- Finally, when Nicole's solo turn is wrapped up, things can end with a more traditional orgy, with Nicole and Kelly fucked in a few positions simultaneously by Mark & James, the end result being that both Nicole & Kelly end up receiving cumshots.
- With their boyfriends sated, Elise & Courtney step in, fully dressed, next to the naked, cum covered losers for a photo to be kept by the winning team as a trophy, with the losers determined to get a rematch to get one of their own, which may work nicely as the basis of a followup story.
Anyway, that's the general idea. What do those of you with more experience (read: everyone) think? Is it potentially workable? I know that not everyone finds this sort of scenario as exciting as I do, but even if no one is interested in writing it out I would love any and all feedback that might help make it a better concept to build on.
Thank you!
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