Relationships where men receive anal sex, either by pegging or from a male partner.

[MissJW]

I started this thread in hopes to get conversation going about relationships where a man regularly receives anal sex either from a woman or from another man. I'm interested in reading how you keep your boy's back bits healthy, how often do you do this, what type of toys you use (or if just fingers) and so on. I'm also interested in the psychological side of it; is it a Dom/sub thing or is it just "regular sex", how do girls feel when one must resort to toys all the time etc...

So, as some of you already know, about half of my penetrative sex life consists of my husband receiving it anally. We live in a D/s relationship but I don't see anal sex as an active part of it; it's basic lovemaking just as vaginal penetration is.

Naturally my husband's health and well-being is always the #1 priority for me, so I've had to study quite a lot about the secrets of anal sex. I can't rely on my own experiences as a receiver, firstly because I don't allow anything up there and secondly cos I'm not a man. So all this prostate stuff has once been new to me, as well as all the functions and restrictions of anal sex. It certainly is so, so, so much more complex than anything I've ever experienced with my own lady parts!

One thing that's been bugging me is that how much anal sex is too much? How often is too often? Considering we always do it very carefully, it doesn't hurt and we don't use huge toys, is there still a chance that we do it too often? When he's home I'd say he's got something penetrating him for about 3-4 times a week, but those weeks when he works away he's only allowed to milk his prostate once a week. I do advice him to massage his anus every day while taking a shower, just to keep it "warm" (and who knows if he occasionally slips a fingertip in) but actual anal penetration is restricted to once a week.

So, if there is "too much" anal penetration, what will happen? Will he lose the ability to hold his, well let's just say it, shit? This is something I'm quite hysterical about... What about his rectum health? We always use coconut oil or water-based lube, lots of it, but let's face it - the anus and rectum aren't meant for insertion. So is it likely that there will there be problems, no matter how gentle and careful we are? His prostate is in good condition and massaging it is never ever painful, so I guess we're fine with that.

As far as the experience goes, I'd say anal sex is one of the main things that keeps our lovelife strong. He uses his penis to make love to me, I use his anus to make love to him. It saddens me that I don't have a body part to do it with, but luckily there are some good strap-on's available. At some point I went through a little crisis of feeling inadequate for being able to provide this only through a "plastic" toy, but I got past it. Hubby did and said everything he could to assure me that even if it is the toy that is penetrating him, it's equally important that I'm the one using it and bringing all the love and emotion with it. I do use my fingers to massage his prostate, but that's more on the D/s side of things.

Well anyway, nobody probably read through this terribly long babble, but if you did I thank you! Feel free to discuss the topic and ask if there's anything you need to know. Hope there's more like-minded girls and boys out there!

 

[J1biboi]

Thank you for starting this thread, it will be interesting to read the responses.

 

[MissJW]

Thank you for starting this thread, it will be interesting to read the responses.

I'd think so too, that is IF there'll be any responses! And yes, yes I'm impatient, I know

 

[J1biboi]

I'd think so too, that is IF there'll be any responses! And yes, yes I'm impatient, I know

I feel like there will be some responses.

 

[ChasBozwell30]

Hi. I've enjoyed being pegged in the past, had truly intense dry orgasms that left my legs shaking, so i can certainly understand how someone could become a little obsessed with it! I don't know how much too much is, don't think I'd do it more than a couple of times a week personally, but of course everyone is different. When I did it it wasn't so much a dom/sub thing, just something I got intense pleasure from, and something that aroused her greatly... x

 

[kccasey]

anal for men

Hello, I love being pegged and using dildo's on myself. My wife pegged me twice but then decided
she didn't like to do it, and has refused since. Even though this was made very plain from the beginning of our relationship, as to what I liked.
Once married and dependent on each other, pegging ended. I am a little resentfull of this but
am living with it. Your husband is lucky to have you.
Just today I had sex, with my dildo's, my ass is still in a state of bliss. My wife is away and I had a chance to do myself. This was the first time I have enjoyed anal sex in several years however.
I do not know how much is too much. Though I have seen videos of men with assholes so streached
there is no way they could keep shit in. I wouldn't want that.

 

[jackofthedawn]

I've never been pegged, but, as a long-time anal toy user, I know that there is a definite trade-off between frequency and intensity. I'm not qualified to give a medical opinion, but I would guess the main risks--assuming that you avoid extreme stretching--are internal abrasions, which are exposed to infection before they heal, and hemorrhoids.

 

[MumSisterTgirlLover]

Hi. I've enjoyed being pegged in the past, had truly intense dry orgasms that left my legs shaking, so i can certainly understand how someone could become a little obsessed with it! I don't know how much too much is, don't think I'd do it more than a couple of times a week personally, but of course everyone is different. When I did it it wasn't so much a dom/sub thing, just something I got intense pleasure from, and something that aroused her greatly... x

That's how I want to do it, just about pleasure, not dom/sub.
Right now it is just fingering and i have shaved a carrot down to be thin and very gradual increase in width, but i want to start using some toys and move on from there..

I definitely don't want to stretch my ass too much or too often, I have seen what someone else mentioned and i think i will be glad of slimmer dido's and cocks in the future, just as long as the are used very well.

 

[Halen]

I started this thread in hopes to get conversation going about relationships where a man regularly receives anal sex either from a woman or from another man. I'm interested in reading how you keep your boy's back bits healthy, how often do you do this, what type of toys you use (or if just fingers) and so on. I'm also interested in the psychological side of it; is it a Dom/sub thing or is it just "regular sex", how do girls feel when one must resort to toys all the time etc...

So, as some of you already know, about half of my penetrative sex life consists of my husband receiving it anally. We live in a D/s relationship but I don't see anal sex as an active part of it; it's basic lovemaking just as vaginal penetration is.

Naturally my husband's health and well-being is always the #1 priority for me, so I've had to study quite a lot about the secrets of anal sex. I can't rely on my own experiences as a receiver, firstly because I don't allow anything up there and secondly cos I'm not a man. So all this prostate stuff has once been new to me, as well as all the functions and restrictions of anal sex. It certainly is so, so, so much more complex than anything I've ever experienced with my own lady parts!

One thing that's been bugging me is that how much anal sex is too much? How often is too often? Considering we always do it very carefully, it doesn't hurt and we don't use huge toys, is there still a chance that we do it too often? When he's home I'd say he's got something penetrating him for about 3-4 times a week, but those weeks when he works away he's only allowed to milk his prostate once a week. I do advice him to massage his anus every day while taking a shower, just to keep it "warm" (and who knows if he occasionally slips a fingertip in) but actual anal penetration is restricted to once a week.

So, if there is "too much" anal penetration, what will happen? Will he lose the ability to hold his, well let's just say it, shit? This is something I'm quite hysterical about... What about his rectum health? We always use coconut oil or water-based lube, lots of it, but let's face it - the anus and rectum aren't meant for insertion. So is it likely that there will there be problems, no matter how gentle and careful we are? His prostate is in good condition and massaging it is never ever painful, so I guess we're fine with that.

As far as the experience goes, I'd say anal sex is one of the main things that keeps our lovelife strong. He uses his penis to make love to me, I use his anus to make love to him. It saddens me that I don't have a body part to do it with, but luckily there are some good strap-on's available. At some point I went through a little crisis of feeling inadequate for being able to provide this only through a "plastic" toy, but I got past it. Hubby did and said everything he could to assure me that even if it is the toy that is penetrating him, it's equally important that I'm the one using it and bringing all the love and emotion with it. I do use my fingers to massage his prostate, but that's more on the D/s side of things.

Well anyway, nobody probably read through this terribly long babble, but if you did I thank you! Feel free to discuss the topic and ask if there's anything you need to know. Hope there's more like-minded girls and boys out there!

I have fantasized about a lover who would do this for me. It's the one thing i could never find irl

 

[ChasBozwell30]

That's how I want to do it, just about pleasure, not dom/sub.
Right now it is just fingering and i have shaved a carrot down to be thin and very gradual increase in width, but i want to start using some toys and move on from there..

I definitely don't want to stretch my ass too much or too often, I have seen what someone else mentioned and i think i will be glad of slimmer dido's and cocks in the future, just as long as the are used very well.

Yeah, i think being penetrated is something of a submissive act, but it can be done in a very loving tender way, and that can only make the pleasure even greater.
There are many different toys out there, try the aneros, that's a pretty small size to start with.

 

[awired50]

We have not tried pegging as of yet . We have been experimenting with prostate play for around a year and a half now. I have two Aneros products and several other massagers. A few are filling but not overly large. I have learned With practice and experience you can accept the larger ones. I prefer the vibrating one myself.

We have really enjoyed the experience and it is a regular part of our sex sessions. We have had sex with the massager in and that made for some interesting feelings as well as explosive orgasms for both of us.

I have not noticed any issues as we have been clean and careful not to cause any internal cuts of bruising. Never force it and remember there is no such thing as too much lube. Patience and not hurrying is also important to a great experience.

I actually feel sorry for the guys who are homophobic about it and will never get to experience the wonderful pleasures that this type of play can bring.

Good luck to you two and kudos to you for wanting to help your hubby experience this pleasure ! Keep us posted and share anything new you discover along the way !

 

[none2_none2]

This is an interesting topic. I can only comment from the standpoint of a top in m2m sex. I think as it relates to frequency, intensity, and size, it all depends on the individual man. That is why it is important to have good communication and also to pay good attention to the man's facial expressions, breathing, body language. (Note: I fuck because I crave being inside a guy. I don't do it just to get off my rocks regardless of what the other guy is experiencing. If it is an activity done to be sadist towards the man on the bottom, then I'm probably not good at advising. I would assume any such activity the participants have some kind of code words that indicate the activities must stop.)

One thing that cocks, fingers, toes, etc up the ass have over toys is that skin contact (sense of touch) has a good way to indicate if there is a problem. I would recommend that fingering be some of the foreplay before fucking. (Note, if you are into long fingernails, perhaps one should consider clipping them. A woman can have beautiful nails without needing the length. I once had a piano teacher who made an effort to point that out -- not for sexual reasons but because it is hard to play the piano correctly if one insists on long nails.) Obviously, your finger won't be as long as a strap on, but at least you can have an idea if there is anything wrong at that first part -- ie hemeroids. I actually once found a medical problem on a guy from just fingering him. (I fingered his prostate, and the next thing he was dripping blood from his cock. Pre-cum and cum should never have any red tint. If they do, then the guy needs to go as soon as he can to his doctor to see if there is something wrong going on in his prostate.) Fingers also help slow down the activities and allow you to add plenty of lube. As someone stated, you can never have too much. (Although the more you have, the more it is important to probalby have a towel on top of the sheets as lube can be hard to wash out.

Note, I didn't bring up enemas for cleaning the guy out. While it sounds like the right thing to do, I always worried that if the guy does that too much, he may mess up the good bacteria that is nessary in the gut to aid in digestion. It would be nice to have a medical person explain the pros/cons to regular enemas. I think one thing that might be a good compromise is to have the guy douch. While they were really designed for women, at least they do not contain a whole gallon of fluids. Depending on how long things are that you are going to insert up his ass, that amoung of cleaning might be enough.

I have also found that if you give a guy a long back rub and also consider rimming him as part of the foreplay, then he is more likely to melt and look so forward to the actual penetration. Again, if it is a dominance thing that he gets off on, then perhaps such a relaxing romantic foreplay might not do anything for him.

Also for me, I fuck like a marathon runner. I want to enjoy the long journey to the finish line. Some guys prefer. Now some tops are like jackrabbits who are racing to the finish line at a frantic pace. I have learned to mix some of that in as my partner prefers the big race more than taking my time. Again, I don't have as much experience with what the woman does when she uses a strap-on. Is the woman going to get off at some point, or is it just to try to get him to have a prostate orgasm? Whatever, you have to figure out what kind of fucks he likes. I'm going to guess like many, variety is also important. So perhaps sometimes are to be slow long runs, vs sometimes to sprint to the finish line.

As stated, I pay a lot of attention to the bottom man because I am NOT into pain. I can loose my erection if he isnt enjoying the activity. I want the bottom to want to do it again sometime in the future, so I want each and every experience to be as positive as possible. If I see grimising in his face, I need to find out what is wrong. Sometimes it just isn't a good day for the activity. Somtime it is something as simple as needing more lube. With a bare cock, you can usually figure that out on your own. With toys, you have to ask. Another thing to keep in mind is sometimes the uncomfortability has absolutely nothing to do with his asshole being penetrated, but that the position is uncomfortable. Doggy for many is the easiest position (although the least romantic. HOWEVER, some guys do have weak knees, and they may not be able to keep it going that way -- no matter how nice the mattress is. It definitely is not comfortable if you are trying it on a hard floor. Face to face is great from a romantic design. It is also good because you can really see his facial expressions as well as have the best angle from which to hear/see his breathing to make sure it isn't labored. However, it too has its draw backs. Some guys are not used to having their legs up near their chest. It may hurt in their hips. It may hurt their muscles in the back off their legs just below their butt. It can also hurt their lower back which is why I always put a pillow under there to help with that -- as well as make the angle of insertion not so large. Fucking a guy in a side scissor position is usually pretty much without pain for him, but then it might wear your own knees out. One angle that is good sometimes for a male top who had a real stiff erection is belly to belly. That is where you are both on your bellies, with the bottom on the bottom and you on the top facing the opposite direction. You then have to really bend your cock until you can get in his hole. It may hurt your cock to bend it back that far, but it is a cool sensation. Sometimes it is too much for the bottom, because your cock is trying to bend down less so you have a lot of pressure on his prostate which might be too much.

I love and CRAVE fucking my type of guy: masculine, muscular, clean hairy guys. It is really the only thing that trips my trigger. Oral just isn't orgasmic to me: it is just very plesant but more considered foreplay in my books. I believe one can fuck fairly often as long as you don't overdo large sizes and the friction of fast sprint fucking and their is no underlying health issues. Nevertheless, the key is the man communicating how he is doing. Just make sure he isn't lying to you because he wants to please you so badly. I'm pleased if the bottom had a great time, and wasn't injured so that he will want to do it again without any hesitation.

 

[MissJW]

Ooh conversation! Wonderful! Thank you all for contributing, I will read everything carefully and reply later on tonight, after things have calmed down a bit.

 

[awired50]

Here's an idea:
Very nice session this morning on the office love seat. Put the leather ring with a vibe underneath my balls. Used the vibe from my Naughty Boy. It has 7 speeds .Inserted the Vice, laid back and put on the blindfold. I had sounds going from Milovana
http://www.milovana.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=9540

For the first 20 minutes I did not touch my cock. I got the two vibes pulsing opposite each other and reached down to stroke.
I was pleasantly surprised at the firm erection I had attained and did not even realize it. My focus was on my prostate and it is roaring by this point. The stroking felt exquisite and continued to get faster as the waves came.

Finally I couldn't take anymore and exploded with an awesome ejaculation. I lay there for a good five minutes with both vibes still going coming down and listening to the sounds.

The blindfold and the sounds really helped me focus during this session. I recommend everyone try it. It's a fine experience !