re-evaluation and new direction

[knot_sweet]

Please excuse my extended absence from this fora, I've been wandering along different kinky paths after my relationship ended.

That sounded like a note from someone's mum.

I had a very long look at what I wanted from BDSM, instead of trying to be what someone else wants.

I don't like pain. I don't want weighted nipple clamps while I get caned. I do want clothes pegs and bare handed spankings.

Crying is great. Once in a while is cathartic. I'd rather laugh.

No, I'm not really all that submissive. I can be, but it's not all I am and it's certainly not the biggest part.

So now I'm headed in a new direction where BDSM isn't the bread holding the sandwich together. Instead it's all the tasty, optional condiments.

BDSM lite if you will...

Seems to suit me better.

Guess my questions are as follows;

1) I assume lots of you have gone through a similar attitude shift at some point. Do you ever regret it?

2) I'm with a new boyfriend who is very open to BDSM lite. However he's like all new people and very enthusiastic. What's the best way of encouraging the light play without turning it into the heavy stuff I don't want?


Thanks all, and I'm glad to be back.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

....

2) I'm with a new boyfriend who is very open to BDSM lite. However he's like all new people and very enthusiastic. What's the best way of encouraging the light play without turning it into the heavy stuff I don't want?

One word: Communication.

Also... welcome back.