cherrypi28
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i heard on the radio that 9 out of ten women have a rape fantasy....is this true...i know i do but i always thought i was one of a few....
rape...every womens fantasy??
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on_the_verge
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cherrypi28 said:
It's possibly true and from what I have read and spoken to friends…the indicator is there, but that's a small percentile…maybe?
IS it your fantasy since you brought it up?
WickedEve
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I've heard that the rape fantasy for most women is more of a "take me and ravish me" kind of fantasy. Like my pirate fantasy... or my viking fantasy... or my... well, you get the picture. 
Though, I'm sure some women fantasize about something much more brutal.
WICKED E
E
Though, I'm sure some women fantasize about something much more brutal.
WICKED E
E
TN_Vixen
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the so-called "rape fantasy" should be taken in context
with a woman's need to be held unresponsible for her own pleasure. Most women - at least from my own generation (I'm 35) and before, have never been given a free license to enjoy sex for the sake of their own sexual satisfaction. Therefore, the idea (and the key word here is "idea") of being put into a situation - primarily non-violent, where she is unable to resist or prevent stimulation and subsequently is free to enjoy whatever sexual simuli might be forced upon her is irresistable.
Unfortunately, the practice of inundating young women with the belief that they are "sluts" or "bad girls" for enjoying sex in whatever form is still very prevelant in today's society.
Don't read too much into the attraction that a lot of women have with regards to "rape" scenes, erotica or pornographic photos. It is simply a derivative of those women who continue to adhere to the repressed ideal with which they've been raised in order to free themselves enough to entitle themselves to an orgasm.
with a woman's need to be held unresponsible for her own pleasure. Most women - at least from my own generation (I'm 35) and before, have never been given a free license to enjoy sex for the sake of their own sexual satisfaction. Therefore, the idea (and the key word here is "idea") of being put into a situation - primarily non-violent, where she is unable to resist or prevent stimulation and subsequently is free to enjoy whatever sexual simuli might be forced upon her is irresistable.
Unfortunately, the practice of inundating young women with the belief that they are "sluts" or "bad girls" for enjoying sex in whatever form is still very prevelant in today's society.
Don't read too much into the attraction that a lot of women have with regards to "rape" scenes, erotica or pornographic photos. It is simply a derivative of those women who continue to adhere to the repressed ideal with which they've been raised in order to free themselves enough to entitle themselves to an orgasm.
on_the_verge
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But Dr. Ruth, isn't there more to text lined and verbatim? Personal flames of juncture, experienced would swell much more than tired eyes over context.
<<attempting not to salt it all>>
<<attempting not to salt it all>>
SempreAngela
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*shaking head* Talk shows can pull numbers out of the air to fit their arguement. Rape is not about lust or being erotic, it's about control from males that have no other control in their lives. NO, rape is not a fantasy for me. Do males fantasize about having their cocks cut off and shoved in their mouths? Because that is what I would like to see done to all rapists.
LukkyKnight
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9 out of 10 statistics cited by people speaking on TV or radio programs are made up on the spot. Of the remaining 10% there are still well over half that are inaccurate, and virtually none which aren't being cited simply to further the speaker's agenda - which may well be ratings.
heterotic
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I think that, for those of us who have absolutely no personal experience with it, rape sounds more like someone with no inhibitions simply overcoming our own, or another spin like that. In that sense, I've had fantasies of the sort myself. I'm sure that if I ever had the misfortune to be actually raped, I'd find it not at all something to be fantasized about.
TN_Vixen
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Re: Re: the so-called "rape fantasy" should be taken in context
heh.. Tell Never that I've Never read Naomi. So, bully to her. ;-)
I agree with the first 2 paragraphs of your post, but the one I singled out I cannot help but disagree with on some level. I find that my fantasies regarding this come not from my inability to "entitle" myself to an orgasm, rather from the way society has shifted regarding female responsibility.
As a woman from the south, even moreso originally from a small conservative town, it takes almost every fiber of your being to continually place yourself in a position of control and a position that warrants respect from your peers, both women and men. I feel that the rape or ravishment fantasy has a direct corollation in my life with the way I feel I must act, and do act, on a daily basis./i]
Which is to say that you feel that your position as a woman in the South dealing with the die-hard (when the fuck are those old men going to die off anyway) man's club society, you are forced into being the epitome of strength regardless of circumstance? So.... after having been forced into postulating this "super woman" persona, once in the sack, your release is based upon a submissive stance justifiably? Ah, so that has nothing to do with denying your right to sexual gratification?
The ravishment fantasy in no way eliminates my guilt for enjoying sex.
Oh, honey... I never meant to insinuate that it did eliminate the guilt. heh. Nothing can eliminate the guilt for us Southern women bred to portray the most genteel (sp?) and virtuous gender. (heh) However, it does somehow release a sense of responsibility for the pleasure one experiences.
Considering I come from a very religious upbringing that looks down severely upon premarital sexual relations, one would assume that this is exactly what I feel according to your post. However, this is simply not the case. My ravishment or light non consent fantasies truly do deal with power to me. I want to have that power and control taken from me by someone I can submit to in that way. It's not giving them power over my orgasm, it's giving them power over my being for a given period of time. Take it for what you want, but I think the last paragraph of your post tries to put ravishment fantasies into a neat little box that is almost sexually stifling.
What is different from giving someone power over you FOR your orgasm FOR a given period of time? I never say that women feel it necessary to give all their power to men. I'm simply stating that some women cannot reach orgasm unless the act of reaching it itself is perceived as not their responsibility.
lavender said:
Never says you have read "Promiscuities" by Naomi Wolf.
heh.. Tell Never that I've Never read Naomi. So, bully to her. ;-)
I agree with the first 2 paragraphs of your post, but the one I singled out I cannot help but disagree with on some level. I find that my fantasies regarding this come not from my inability to "entitle" myself to an orgasm, rather from the way society has shifted regarding female responsibility.
As a woman from the south, even moreso originally from a small conservative town, it takes almost every fiber of your being to continually place yourself in a position of control and a position that warrants respect from your peers, both women and men. I feel that the rape or ravishment fantasy has a direct corollation in my life with the way I feel I must act, and do act, on a daily basis./i]
Which is to say that you feel that your position as a woman in the South dealing with the die-hard (when the fuck are those old men going to die off anyway) man's club society, you are forced into being the epitome of strength regardless of circumstance? So.... after having been forced into postulating this "super woman" persona, once in the sack, your release is based upon a submissive stance justifiably? Ah, so that has nothing to do with denying your right to sexual gratification?
The ravishment fantasy in no way eliminates my guilt for enjoying sex.
Oh, honey... I never meant to insinuate that it did eliminate the guilt. heh. Nothing can eliminate the guilt for us Southern women bred to portray the most genteel (sp?) and virtuous gender. (heh) However, it does somehow release a sense of responsibility for the pleasure one experiences.
Considering I come from a very religious upbringing that looks down severely upon premarital sexual relations, one would assume that this is exactly what I feel according to your post. However, this is simply not the case. My ravishment or light non consent fantasies truly do deal with power to me. I want to have that power and control taken from me by someone I can submit to in that way. It's not giving them power over my orgasm, it's giving them power over my being for a given period of time. Take it for what you want, but I think the last paragraph of your post tries to put ravishment fantasies into a neat little box that is almost sexually stifling.
What is different from giving someone power over you FOR your orgasm FOR a given period of time? I never say that women feel it necessary to give all their power to men. I'm simply stating that some women cannot reach orgasm unless the act of reaching it itself is perceived as not their responsibility.
I dated 3 girls who claimed to have a rape fantasy. One liked to be spanked and "forced" to do things she didn't want to do. I never broke into the house or anything like that but we did some fantasy stuff. I have a pair (2 actually) of hinged handcuffs that I used to use to keep her from using her hands. Almost snapped off one of the keys one time.
Why handcuffs? I am a police officer, no other reason.
Why handcuffs? I am a police officer, no other reason.
TN_Vixen
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Re: Re: Re: Re: the so-called "rape fantasy" should be taken in context
First off, let me say that I didn't mean to insinuate that you should feel guilty about having an orgasm, just that society in general has never really validated a woman's right to enjoy it. Sure, times have changed since I was a pre-teen and subjected myself to the "stranger in the bedroom" fantasies, but, still, "good girls" aren't those who flaunt their sexuality however overt or covert they may do so.
To say that you desire to have "power taken away in some sense", indicates to me that you still have some repressed conditioned belief that you need to feel unburdened by your erotic responses. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that need, that desire. However, there is something wrong with it if you don't recognize it for what it is.
lavender said:
First off, let me say that I didn't mean to insinuate that you should feel guilty about having an orgasm, just that society in general has never really validated a woman's right to enjoy it. Sure, times have changed since I was a pre-teen and subjected myself to the "stranger in the bedroom" fantasies, but, still, "good girls" aren't those who flaunt their sexuality however overt or covert they may do so.
To say that you desire to have "power taken away in some sense", indicates to me that you still have some repressed conditioned belief that you need to feel unburdened by your erotic responses. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that need, that desire. However, there is something wrong with it if you don't recognize it for what it is.
monster666
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SempreAngela said:
I agree that there should be zero tolerance for rapists.
But I have talked to several women about this once I heard of it years ago, and all of them have had the same type of fantasy. I don't think these fantasies are fantasies about true rape. Not the brutal, un-erotic crime you are thinking of. It's more about being taken in some more romantic, imaginary way by someone they feel have no business having sex with normally. The women I talked to almost without exception had this fantasy - with most of the exceptions being those who were abused, raped or consoled the abused or raped. As a rule, knowledge of the real thing does have a tendancy to stifle any and all fantasies about it.
monster666
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nasty said:
Here's the paradox: if she wants you it's not rape. And If she doesn't, you don't want to do it. Hence, there is no one "man" enough to fulfill such a fantasy.
I don't have a rape fantasy.
Monsters point makes the most sence of it in my eyes.
The point that we are all about what we want, and if it is something we wouldn't want, then it wouldn't likly become a fantasy, and rape is something vile and offensive, which we inherently do not want. Just ask anyone who has experianced it. They are plauged with nightmares of it rather than fantasies.
Don't get me wrong. I love to be violated. I love to have my panties ripped off, while I try and cover myself with my hands, only to be pulled from my body to be pinned down.
Hair pulling is the best. I even get off if some literally gets ripped out. (not alot).
That shit's just fun. It's animalistic. It isn't rape.
Monsters point makes the most sence of it in my eyes.
The point that we are all about what we want, and if it is something we wouldn't want, then it wouldn't likly become a fantasy, and rape is something vile and offensive, which we inherently do not want. Just ask anyone who has experianced it. They are plauged with nightmares of it rather than fantasies.
Don't get me wrong. I love to be violated. I love to have my panties ripped off, while I try and cover myself with my hands, only to be pulled from my body to be pinned down.
Hair pulling is the best. I even get off if some literally gets ripped out. (not alot).
That shit's just fun. It's animalistic. It isn't rape.
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monster666
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nasty said:
Okay, I'm lost. I may regret asking, but what's a "disclosure" situation?
Calamity Jane
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WickedEve said:I've heard that the rape fantasy for most women is more of a "take me and ravish me" kind of fantasy. Like my pirate fantasy... or my viking fantasy... or my... well, you get the picture.
Exactly... add to that my being 'taken' by an Indian warrior as we're galloping across the prairie...
cherrypi28
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Starfish said:I don't have a rape fantasy.
Monsters point makes the most sence of it in my eyes.
The point that we are all about what we want, and if it is something we wouldn't want, then it wouldn't likly become a fantasy, and rape is something vile and offensive, which we inherently do not want. Just ask anyone who has experianced it. They are plauged with nightmares of it rather than fantasies.
Don't get me wrong. I love to be violated. I love to have my panties ripped off, while I try and cover myself with my hands, only to be pulled from my body to be pinned down.
Hair pulling is the best. I even get off if some literally gets ripped out. (not alot).
That shit's just fun. It's animalistic. It isn't rape.
i love your description.....i love the hair pulling panties being torn off also......wow...the lust i am feeling right now
