Queer pronouns

[BrightShinyGirl]

I started out writing just straight sex, but lately I've done a few lesbian stories.

It made me realize how heavily I'd been relying on he/she in sex scenes to make it clear who's doing what to whom.

What tricks do you use when both lovers are the same gender?

Skin color, eye color, and hair color can only do so much!

 

[MrPixel]

Even though it gets horribly redundant, I have to fall back on names in these situations. Latest trick I'm using is ultra-short and vocally-clipped nicknames, the kind that lovers would naturally use with each other. "Cyan" becomes "Cy", "Jackson" becomes "Jax", "Emily" becomes "Em", "Darcy" becomes "Dar" or "Darce", and so on. "Steve"? Well, that one doesn't quite work because of the long 'E' sound, but he gets the ladies, anyway.

 

[Winter_Fare]

I try to stick to a single pov, even when writing in third person. That is I only describe the sensation that one person feels, and what they observe their partner experiencing. Also, lots more names and dialogue tags than with a mixed sex couple.

 

[KeithD]

I started out writing just straight sex, but lately I've done a few lesbian stories.

It made me realize how heavily I'd been relying on he/she in sex scenes to make it clear who's doing what to whom.

What tricks do you use when both lovers are the same gender?

Skin color, eye color, and hair color can only do so much!

Same problem with GM. I use names more often then for straight stories. Often there's a body size or age difference that's key to the story and then "big one/small one" or "older one/younger one" can be used. When there are more than two characters I often have to establish difference by coloring or other contrasting body characteristics--blond/bald, etc. But you're right, it's all harder when the genders are the same.

 

[Altissimus]

It's a struggle, to be sure. I find phrases like 'the older woman' or 'the red-head' can be used, but must be used sparingly because they are more laborious. With careful sentence structure you can eliminate some needs to refer back, but... it's hard work. After a point I think names become a little bit like 'he said' - transparent to the reader, a clarity of who is doing what to whom, and as authors we probably worry about them too much. Which is not carte-blanche to drop them in like confetti.

 

[DarkCosmos]

As someone else who enjoys writing lesbian sex scenes, I'm happy to hear I'm not the only one who's struggled with this. I find myself having to fall back on thing like "the blonde" or "the redhead" at some point I worry it becomes objectifying when I really just want to avoid confusion.

 

[Euphony]

Lots of good ideas in the thread. I find it can be calamitous enough to need a mix of methods to not repeat too much.

Names work.

Physical descriptors.

If it's a character piece, I like to use actions that very much fit one character's personality over the other. (I write mostly opposites so I have that to leverage) It also is a reader "success" they can internalize ("Shawna would sooo do that.)

When things are trickier, I find devices that allow for more reader interaction can stave off reader frustrations/buy you time between unique descriptors (I can only generate so many before I run out of ability)

 

[Booleanean]

I've written some Lesbian and GM stuff, and both do involve some more names than straight stuff. I've gotten lost in he/she's in straight stuff and just plain forgotten characters names if I'm writing something short. If you're careful about how you set your scene up, you can use regular pronouns as well though.

Establish that one of your characters is going down on the other, and all of these "she"'s refer to exactly one character. It's a bit excessive, and I'd probably sprinkle in some tags and names in a longer scene, but it demonstrates the idea.

Her tongue circled her clit, sending waves of pleasure up her spine. When she added another finger, she tightened her muscles around them.

"One of these days, you're going to break my fingers like that," she joked.

"Hey, you do your hand exercises, and I'll keep doing my kegels."

If they're sixty-nining, it gets a bit more complicated of course, but at the very least careful prep work can help in a lot of situations.

You can also establish things the characters like ahead of time, or things they're particularly good at. If you know one of your male characters is the absolute Throat King, while the other can't even brush his teeth without gagging, your deepthroat scene just got a lot easier to write. Is the character vomiting? Then it's the second one. One of your female characters might have long nails, so fingering is rare and fraught, or one might shave infrequently and be stubbly and rough on her face, while the other waxes or just grows their pubic hair out.

Being clear with your scene setting works as well. Spend an extra sexy paragraph painting the picture, draping your main POV character over the pillows at the head of her bed as her partner crawls up seductively and kisses her way up her legs, slowly, achingly slowly, teasing her until the anticipation is almost too much to contain. If your reader has a clear view of how the scene is set up, lots of "she did this" or "she did that" is suddenly only possible for a single character. The person wearing the strap-on can't suck it. The person with the butt plug in can't take it up the ass without removing it first, so "his cock" sliding in must be the cock of the plug wearer into the other, plugless partner.

Final alternatives, and what I thought this thread was going to be about, is to give one of your characters different pronouns. Plenty of he/they's out there, that still primarily identify as male, and all of a sudden they can suck his cock, and it's perfectly clear what's going on.

If you're particularly adventurous, you can even give one or more of your characters neopronouns. They're surprisingly easy to use once you get used to them, and it's good practice for when you inevitably run into someone with neo-pronouns in Real Life in the future, if you haven't already.

The thing I still haven't figured out how to do without name dropping like a wannabe at a hollywood party is a four person pan orgy. His cock going into an ass is suddenly one of six options, given an MMFF group. I like to think I'm okay at setting scenes, but if everyone is piled into a bed and going at it with each other, it's really hard to keep that scene tight enough in your reader's head to actually keep things clear without using names. It's especially complicated if you like to focus on your POV character and the person in front of them, like a real person might in a real group setting. They're aware of the debauchery going on around them, but mostly they're thinking and describing how they feel and how they are being interacted with.

 

[Bamagan]

I started out writing just straight sex, but lately I've done a few lesbian stories.

It made me realize how heavily I'd been relying on he/she in sex scenes to make it clear who's doing what to whom.

What tricks do you use when both lovers are the same gender?

Skin color, eye color, and hair color can only do so much!

The only thing I have left to add to the advice above, most of which I have also used at some point, is that I find excuses for them to have dialogue in the scene, so that I can sort of ride on the coattails of the speech identifier and otherwise take advantage of a structural shift. I usually write from 3rd person limited, so it also helps me convey things the other party is experiencing that wouldn't necessarily be obvious from body language, expression, etc.

 

[AchtungNight]

Names, description details (blonde, British, young, etc) are what I fall back on in this situation also. Never slurs, those are off limits to me for good reason. I also try to keep further challenges minimal. Speaking as someone who’s femslashed two athletes with the same first name in his fanfics.

 

[Altissimus]

When she added another finger, she tightened her muscles around them.

Yeah... there's the problem. Why would she tighten her muscles around her own finger? This would jar me out of the moment. Maybe I'm just too pedantic, I don't know.

 

[yukonnights]

What I'm about to say is somewhat of a controversy here @ AH. That said, I don't find two females or two males in the same bed to be a problem because I often write in a Close First Person POV which allows both characters words and thoughts to be shared on the page.

For anyone interested in checking out a Lesbian story in this style; here's a link to Unexpected Love — https://literotica.com/s/unexpected-love-4

Or use the link in my signature to get to my works and go from there.

 

[Booleanean]

Yeah... there's the problem. Why would she tighten her muscles around her own finger? This would jar me out of the moment. Maybe I'm just too pedantic, I don't know.

"Muscles" here would, for me at least very heavily imply "vaginal wall muscles", you wouldn't use that if you were just squeezing a finger with your other hand. It's very hard to have your fingers inside yourself if someone is going down in you, there's like... this whole head in the way.

You're right though that it can be a bit hit and miss, and like I said, I made the example pretty extreme. Definitely something to let sit for a week or two before editing, or have someone else provide feedback on.

 

[Altissimus]

What I'm about to say is somewhat of a controversy here @ AH. That said, I don't find two females or two males in the same bed to be a problem because I often write in a Close First Person POV which allows both characters words and thoughts to be shared on the page.

For anyone interested in checking out a Lesbian story in this style; here's a link to Unexpected Love — https://literotica.com/s/unexpected-love-4

Or use the link in my signature to get to my works and go from there.

First Person POV doesn't share the same issues, because 'I' and 'her' are different pronouns. It is, for sure, an alternative solution. But if you're writing in Close Third, for example... the problem escalates rapidly.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

Besides all the tricks above, I try to give them different speech patterns and endearment habits. If one consistently uses 'babe' or 'babes' and the other is more 'love' and 'sweetheart', it can help make clear who is talking.

But mainly you just have to use names more. Ali and Becca in my stories started as A and B... If you have ten women in a story like Naked Bisexual Lube Wrestling, then they just have to take turns on the sexy stuff so you don't need to worry about more than four at a time. Why yes, I was off my face on meds when I wrote most of that one, and it rather shows...

 

[MillieDynamite]

I use names, races, the older woman and the younger gal, the bigger woman, the stronger woman, or such when writing lesbian sex. Petty much make one of the men stronger and more mainly when doing gay sex. But transgender, well, I've never had two transgenders at one time, so that hasn't been an issue yet. So far, all my trans stories have been transwoman and a man.

 

[Gamblnluck]

I tend to put the person into whatever person they are. Now in my most recent story the man is being forced to dress and be addressed to as a female, which he hates. He has been forced to live as a female but now his maleness is observed. I had him remain a male dressed like a woman. Others called him "her or him' which humiliated. I did the same. interchangably to show the man;s status.

 

[Bramblethorn]

First-person narration helps, though it's not a complete solution when there are more than two people in the scene. Names are also handy but leaning on them too heavily can feel clumsy.

Beyond that, mostly I depend on context/role to make it clear. For instance, there's a three-person scene in chapter 10 of Red Scarf. Anjali (Lily) is tipsy, in an exhibitionist mood, and trying to shock. Lucy is flustered, because she's been crushing on Sarah (narrator) and has unexpectedly been offered a threesome with her, but realises it'd be a bad idea to rush into it. Even where I'm not using names, it should be pretty clear who is who from the differences in how they're behaving and talking.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I started out writing just straight sex, but lately I've done a few lesbian stories.

It made me realize how heavily I'd been relying on he/she in sex scenes to make it clear who's doing what to whom.

What tricks do you use when both lovers are the same gender?

Skin color, eye color, and hair color can only do so much!

Write in first person!

I wrote a third person lesbian series and what you cite was a total nightmare. You can only use their names and things like “the older girl” so much. Both were blonde, which didn’t help.

Em

 

[ronde]

I use names most of the time. In dialogue, as long as there are only two characters involved, it's enough to name the first speaker. The reader can follow the lines of dialogue and understand who's talking. If it's the narrator talking, it helps a lot to not switch the narrative from one character to the other very quickly. I'll tend to write at least a small paragraph about one character before writing anything about another. Typical pronouns still work in that case.

 

[EmilyMiller]

Write in first person!

I wrote a third person lesbian series and what you cite was a total nightmare. You can only use their names and things like “the older girl” so much. Both were blonde, which didn’t help.

Em

I couldn’t change the hair color as both were based on RL people.

Em

 

[Gamblnluck]

I just posted a story that I admit is not doing well. The character in question is a male forced to assume a female persona. At times I use her and others him, a lot of the time i use he/she when others are referring to him. In this story it is NOT due to identity but how the family is treating him.
In real life, I do not care how a person lives. They can live as a woman or a man. But as far as I am concerned about their sex, they are a male or female based on what is between their legs. What they do with their personal life and HOW they use whatever genitals are down there and with whom is up to them and nobody else.
It is not my responsibility to acknowledge that.

 

[pink_silk_glove]

I love all the ads in this thread in the guise of advice.

 

[MrPixel]

I love all the ads in this thread in the guise of advice.

What? Seriously. What?

 

[gunhilltrain]

Write in first person!

I wrote a third person lesbian series and what you cite was a total nightmare. You can only use their names and things like “the older girl” so much. Both were blonde, which didn’t help.

Em

By co-incidence, I did use first person in the story that came out last month. Amanda had already narrated the geek pride entry, so I used her again in the prequel a year earlier when she meets her lover Lucy. (She seems interesting enough that I may do a couple of sequels too.) By the way, she already had made it clear that she always uses her full first name, not "Mandy," in all personal interactions. Lucy doesn't mind her full name, Lucille, but she will usually use her "nickname." So far it's working fine on yet another story I'm writing, which is sort of a "sequel to the prequel," if that makes any sense.