Punishment?

[MeekMe]

^_^ Sexual punishment varies. Mister gave me a short spanking (which I'm not a fan of) the other night when I did the wrong thing. He told me after we were done playing that his original punishment was to stop everything and leave to go watch TV.

@_@ That would have been the worst! >.< I'll take the spanking over getting nothing at all!

 

[Felonious1]

I first saw that fifty years ago, in Playboy magazine jokes behind the centerfold. It struck me, at that very tender age, that such a response would be a fast way to lose a lover.

Which isn't much of a joke.

Maybe so. Maybe not. Depends on who's serving whom and/or if its ultimately worth waiting on or not?

 

[Endless_Night]

I feel one thing needs defining for the newbies stumbling off into our dark alleyways here.

Most of us here of the masochist or sadist sexual inclination or subtype, do no consider striking/being struck for mutual sexual gratification a form of " punishment" per se. It's mutually desired within the S&M dynamic, and designed to be enjoyable for all parties involved. .

Holy moly!!! I'm a masochist? Bizarre as it may sound, the thought never crossed my mind. I'm not into pain, sexual or otherwise, but I guess a craving for physical erotic punishment does sort of imply....

Point taken, however. It may be that my perception is where the problem lies. Why does what I want have to be "punishment"? The word does seem to be what's creating my mental stumbling block. Why couldn't it be "stress relief"? If so, then, like CutieMouse, I might be able to just ask for what I want.

Something to think about.

Maybe you, Endless Night, need treatment. "It's for your own good."

Friends and family have been saying so for years!

 

[unicorn64]

Someone said forced orgasms, How? Since I can't orgasm how could someone force me to for punishment.

 

[desertslave]

Holy moly!!! I'm a masochist? Bizarre as it may sound, the thought never crossed my mind. I'm not into pain, sexual or otherwise, but I guess a craving for physical erotic punishment does sort of imply....

Point taken, however. It may be that my perception is where the problem lies. Why does what I want have to be "punishment"? The word does seem to be what's creating my mental stumbling block. Why couldn't it be "stress relief"? If so, then, like CutieMouse, I might be able to just ask for what I want.

Purely IMO, "masochist" is a spectrum of pain tolerance to appreciation to abject need, and the levels of pain vary widely. I'm a huge fan of impact play: floggers, canes, his hand. I still yell (and not the happy kind) if I step on a Lego in the dark or if the dentist didn't give me enough novocaine.

I started to say "BDSM is one of the ways we have sex" but that's not quite true. One way or another it sneaks in almost all of the time. It could be a look, a swat as I pass by, his hand firmly in my hair, or a full-out play session. He gives me pain along with/as part of pleasure, and we both get off on it. There's no pretense of punishment or that "you've been a naughty girl" thing. It's just us, being us.

And if it's hard to actually say what you'd like, I've found that leaving a riding crop on his pillow can work wonders.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Maybe so. Maybe not. Depends on who's serving whom and/or if its ultimately worth waiting on or not?

"Please hurt me?"

"Not yet."

Now that's hot.

 

[Felonious1]

"Please hurt me?"

"Not yet."

Now that's hot.

Digging the peanuts out of the contextual feces here.........but via the big letter eluding to impending, verbally asked for acts/actions to come, the top has already given up the element of surprise and squashed the serendipitous kink value that comes with figuratively striking without warning. ( Which is something I personally won't give up. )

Otoh........if it came to mine asking for " x, y and maybe a bit of z " in order to fulfill her maso needs. I wouldn't let it drop until I was siting squarely inside her head, strip her mentally bare and lead her into divulging all her darkest desires in begging form. Of course this would turn up the internal temps, and no doubt lead to some intense physical contact.

That's what I consider HOT.........

 

[Felonious1]

Holy moly!!! I'm a masochist? Bizarre as it may sound, the thought never crossed my mind. I'm not into pain, sexual or otherwise, but I guess a craving for physical erotic punishment does sort of imply....

Point taken, however. It may be that my perception is where the problem lies. Why does what I want have to be "punishment"? The word does seem to be what's creating my mental stumbling block. Why couldn't it be "stress relief"? If so, then, like CutieMouse, I might be able to just ask for what I want.

Something to think about.




Friends and family have been saying so for years!

In response to the highlighted part of your post..........

Ive seen its simply not possible for some people who harbor S&M desires and/or willfully take part in said sadistic and/or masochist acts to be mentally ok with said thoughts, acts and/or actions committed. Thus it's approached and/or scene played under the guise of punishment to framed it in another way that's less abrasive and straight to the sadist or maso point of being.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Someone said forced orgasms, How? Since I can't orgasm how could someone force me to for punishment.

Could you enjoy the activities for their own sake, or would that be boring and dull for you?

<snip for rhetoric that was drowning in shit>

... impending, verbally asked for acts/actions to come, the top has already given up the element of surprise and squashed the serendipitous kink value that comes with figuratively striking without warning. ( Which is something I personally won't give up. )

You would make SO MANY WOMEN SO VERY HAPPY because they have also come to believe that asking for what you want makes it not the real thing anymore.

Congratulations on being the exception that proves the rule

 

[Endless_Night]

And if it's hard to actually say what you'd like, I've found that leaving a riding crop on his pillow can work wonders.

I looooved this idea! Reading the words, I actually went all tingly! Unfortunately, when I pictured the action (he has a crop from Halloween past) my chest clenched up.

Sigh. I'm afraid this is going to take some work. Odd, really, considering I have no prejudice towards submission, except towards myself apparently.

The Easton/Hardy books on topping and bottoming were the first BDSM books I read. They seemed to focus almost exclusively on RP. Most posters on the board seem to incorporate "kink" into their daily lives; not necessarily setting up "scenes". I wonder, though....

Has anyone found it easier to dissociate oneself from initial embarrassment of "kink" in RP? (Assuming of course they had embarrassment to begin with.)

Otoh........if it came to mine asking for " x, y and maybe a bit of z " in order to fulfill her maso needs. I wouldn't let it drop until I was siting squarely inside her head, strip her mentally bare and lead her into divulging all her darkest desires in begging form. Of course this would turn up the internal temps, and no doubt lead to some intense physical contact.

That's what I consider HOT.........

Oh my! Speaking of hot....

I guess I am a masochist.

 

[Logtag]

I've recently survived raising two teenagers. In my mind it's not all that different. It becomes an exercise in "hitting them where they live"...what sort of chore or privation will have the most meaning and the most sting for the intended victim? Making it relevant to the infraction helps, but isn't always necessary.

My son isn't exactly a social butterfly. Grounding him has little or no meaning, with the exception of one weekly event. Disable or remove a video game unit, however, and the world might as well just end now. I once stood in front of him with the cables for his PS/3 and a pair of scissors, and gave him a countdown until he got up and completed his chores.

It is amazing what works now, compared to what used to work. Then, grounding was everything. Now...take away the game console or the internet, and you have committed a crime...lol

But I agree. The punishment does however, need to be similar in "level" as the infraction though. And if you can make it relevant, all the better.

 

[ecstaticsub]

I know for teenagers changing the password for the router works well as punishment. They usually have to do certain chores or whatever before I tell them the new password.

 

[unicorn64]

I still don't understand forced orgasms and multiple orgasms close together as punishment. As a person who doesn't orgasm, I guess using the Hitachi magic wand until orgasm is reached might be considered forced orgasm but once it happens it ain't gonna happen again for the rest of the night or for three or four days. No mater how long the magic wand is used. Force me baby, if you think you can.

 

[seela]

I still don't understand forced orgasms and multiple orgasms close together as punishment. As a person who doesn't orgasm, I guess using the Hitachi magic wand until orgasm is reached might be considered forced orgasm but once it happens it ain't gonna happen again for the rest of the night or for three or four days. No mater how long the magic wand is used. Force me baby, if you think you can.

After a while the stimulation gets painful for most people anyway, so in that respect it works whether there's an orgasm or not.