Possible new non-consent idea

[Miss_Shy_Newcastle]

Just want to see how it goes down before I commit pen to paper (or rather fingers to keyboard) as I'm not sure it's a little too over the top.

Basic plotline is three young ladies in their early 20's jet off to Paris on holiday. Whilst there, they are kidnapped and sold into slavery. The story will concentrate on one of the girls journeys. As she is a virgin she will go in an auction. She is bought by a man who prides himself of being something of a perfectionist. He sees her as a blank canvas on which he can create the perfect slave.

I'm still working on the details, but being as he's a perfectionist there will be a lot he will want to change - some major, some minor. Some of the more major things he would want to change are her eyesight and breast size. Lesser things will include hair colouring and cutting. And plenty of punishment. With help from his other female slaves who have all been broken in over time.

Please let me have your thoughts - don't be too harsh!

 

[DarkBee]

Was changing major physical attributes possible in the 1920's? Otherwise, it sounds like a good idea.

 

[Miss_Shy_Newcastle]

Was changing major physical attributes possible in the 1920's? Otherwise, it sounds like a good idea.

It's set in modern day - the ladies are in age range of 20's I meant.

 

[DarkBee]

Oh, my bad.
Although a historical setting could be nice too...

 

[Miss_Shy_Newcastle]

Oh, my bad.
Although a historical setting could be nice too...

It had crossed my mind - but then again I never was very good at history!

 

[VoyageToBeyond]

I like the plotline, the sense of complete control over another to even transform their physical look, not just their psychological submission. I am not particularly familiar with these types of stories, but do remember reading a few similar types that were historical - both of them located in the Middle East. But I think a modern-day story would be good, it is after all as much a reality today as it was in the past, if not more so, given the slave trade is a multi-billion dollar industry!

I like the auction idea, particularly of a virgin being sold off. I can imagine most of it would be done electronically rather than in person for security reasons. How might that work? Possibly, each potential bidder gets 15 minutes of web access to the girl while another woman is in the room with her, making sure she does what the bidder asks, so he knows what he is getting: bend over, spread her legs, cup her breasts, whatever. Or would it be a more "low end" auction, in some back room of a warehouse on the fishing wharf, with lots of unscrupulous types around fingering and prodding the girls up for sale? Given your buyer is a perfectionist, I would see it more as a high-end, electronic auction.

Have fun writing this one! Do let us know when you have submitted it!

 

[Tanuki]

I think the problem with that kind of story is that breast surgury or eye surgury (i guess you mean he wants her not to need glasses?) have recovery times - months for breasts - so you have to deal with that.

I personally, and I think a lot of readers, would be very turned off by her going under the knife without consent.

That's why I like sci-fi sometimes, you can get around that realism, and just focus on the emotional effect.

you could go halfway and say the man has some new drug that will increase her breast size.

 

[Miss_Shy_Newcastle]

I like the auction idea, particularly of a virgin being sold off. I can imagine most of it would be done electronically rather than in person for security reasons. How might that work? Possibly, each potential bidder gets 15 minutes of web access to the girl while another woman is in the room with her, making sure she does what the bidder asks, so he knows what he is getting: bend over, spread her legs, cup her breasts, whatever. Or would it be a more "low end" auction, in some back room of a warehouse on the fishing wharf, with lots of unscrupulous types around fingering and prodding the girls up for sale? Given your buyer is a perfectionist, I would see it more as a high-end, electronic auction.

Have fun writing this one! Do let us know when you have submitted it!

I was looking at the high end bidding. The webcam thing was something I was considering anyway - my plan was that the bidders would have some form of access to watch the initial preparation for auction - they can then see for themselves she is a virgin. Of course the buyer would no doubt want to check it for himself.

 

[Miss_Shy_Newcastle]

I think the problem with that kind of story is that breast surgury or eye surgury (i guess you mean he wants her not to need glasses?) have recovery times - months for breasts - so you have to deal with that.

I personally, and I think a lot of readers, would be very turned off by her going under the knife without consent.

That's why I like sci-fi sometimes, you can get around that realism, and just focus on the emotional effect.

you could go halfway and say the man has some new drug that will increase her breast size.

I would certainly look to incorporate that. With Mr Perfectionist also being incredibly wealthy, he also has a vast selection of methods at his disposal. Maybe some form of eye drops to change the colour of her eyes and perfect her eyesight. And rather than make them larger I'm actually looking at reduction, so a needle would work for that. I'm also looking at having her a little too fat for his liking, so was thinking of putting some form of drug in it alongside a diet and fitness regieme.

 

[JCanuck]

It's a very interesting idea as he takes complete control of her. After she spends a little time and is starting to be turned into his property he should make her sign an actual contract giving herself to him and believes she must obey his wishes. Like the idea.

 

[Mansa Musa]

Just want to see how it goes down before I commit pen to paper (or rather fingers to keyboard) as I'm not sure it's a little too over the top.

Basic plotline is three young ladies in their early 20's jet off to Paris on holiday. Whilst there, they are kidnapped and sold into slavery. The story will concentrate on one of the girls journeys. As she is a virgin she will go in an auction. She is bought by a man who prides himself of being something of a perfectionist. He sees her as a blank canvas on which he can create the perfect slave.

I'm still working on the details, but being as he's a perfectionist there will be a lot he will want to change - some major, some minor. Some of the more major things he would want to change are her eyesight and breast size. Lesser things will include hair colouring and cutting. And plenty of punishment. With help from his other female slaves who have all been broken in over time.

Please let me have your thoughts - don't be too harsh!

It's been done. If you were hoping to be original, you didn't quite make the grade. But, personally speaking, I'm a big fan of Pygmalion-type stories. If you do decide to write it, I will enjoy every word.

 

[Totzman]

Just want to see how it goes down before I commit pen to paper (or rather fingers to keyboard) as I'm not sure it's a little too over the top.

Basic plotline is three young ladies in their early 20's jet off to Paris on holiday. Whilst there, they are kidnapped and sold into slavery. The story will concentrate on one of the girls journeys. As she is a virgin she will go in an auction. She is bought by a man who prides himself of being something of a perfectionist. He sees her as a blank canvas on which he can create the perfect slave.

I'm still working on the details, but being as he's a perfectionist there will be a lot he will want to change - some major, some minor. Some of the more major things he would want to change are her eyesight and breast size. Lesser things will include hair colouring and cutting. And plenty of punishment. With help from his other female slaves who have all been broken in over time.

Please let me have your thoughts - don't be too harsh!

I really like this idea. I may be in the minority here, but I personally would find the story more enjoyable if the girls were subject to severe pain against their will, including surgery.

For a while, I've been contemplating writing a branding story. My premise was similiar to yours, but the girls, once sold to their masters, would be branded so as to mark them as his own property. The master would have some sort of logo or symbol that he burns onto the skin of each one of his girls. I realize a story like this isn't for everyone, but those of us into BSDM might find it very enjoyable reading about the painful procedure of branding, especially if performed on an attractive woman's body.

 

[Tanuki]

For a while, I've been contemplating writing a branding story. My premise was similiar to yours, but the girls, once sold to their masters, would be branded so as to mark them as his own property. The master would have some sort of logo or symbol that he burns onto the skin of each one of his girls. I realize a story like this isn't for everyone, but those of us into BSDM might find it very enjoyable reading about the painful procedure of branding, especially if performed on an attractive woman's body.

Branding makes me think of one of those Gor books. Such enticing covers, while inside was total crap!

 

[Miss_Shy_Newcastle]

I really like this idea. I may be in the minority here, but I personally would find the story more enjoyable if the girls were subject to severe pain against their will, including surgery.

For a while, I've been contemplating writing a branding story. My premise was similiar to yours, but the girls, once sold to their masters, would be branded so as to mark them as his own property. The master would have some sort of logo or symbol that he burns onto the skin of each one of his girls. I realize a story like this isn't for everyone, but those of us into BSDM might find it very enjoyable reading about the painful procedure of branding, especially if performed on an attractive woman's body.

At some point she will be either tattooed or branded. I'm thinking it's the final straw that breaks her.

 

[Miss_Shy_Newcastle]

It's been done. If you were hoping to be original, you didn't quite make the grade. But, personally speaking, I'm a big fan of Pygmalion-type stories. If you do decide to write it, I will enjoy every word.

Well, it's almost impossible to break the mould. Most things have been done!

 

[noisymother]

Not my kind of story - but an interesting idea. A challenge to write. And I'm avoiding doing my own writing!

I thought: the film Boxing Helena - where the guy totally possesses the woman - by cutting off her arms and legs - even if the end is a cop out. It was an interesting way of looking at total possession.

And the tv series - based on the book by Fay Weldon - The Lives and Loves of a She Devil - where a woman undertakes surgery to totally change her appearance - to make her look like her husband's new wife. Weird determined woman. I know her transformation is self inflicted - but there might be something there that is useful.

Finally - tattoo or branding - the straw that breaks her - I don't know - after all the transforming surgery etc and pain before - it might be difficult to write that convincingly. I realise it would be the labelling/ownership idea that would break her - rather than the pain - which would be minimal after breast surgery - so you'd have to write skilfully to get that across.

None of this is probably any use at all - but maybe . . .

 

[Stoke_bloke_UK]

Just a first thought.....

Hi Miss_Shy,

I'm a newbie here on the Discussion Boards (although I've been a lurker for years!), but I love this idea - possibly the only twist I'd add would be for the three women to be related, say mum and two daughters, as you could also explore the idea of seeing them enslaved and used together.

Can't wait to read the finished article though!