Poll for the marriage minded and married...

[Jaybird3]

I know that this is going to sound strange but this very subject has come up several times lately on both the how to board and on the general board as well.

How important do you think that having matching sex drives is to a marriage?

We have been discussing cheating, adultery, having a open marriage. It appears to me that somewhere down the line that the sex drive of a partner comes into play somewhere. It also seems to me that it can make or break a marriage.

Please discuss and give your honest opinion on this.

 

[English Lady]

I think that it is terribly important. I have been having sex with my hubby for years before we got married and i knew we matched up well in our sex drives long before we got hitched.


Sex is important in a marriage,it brings intimacy,trust,love and nurturing as well as being an outlet for built up energy etc....


I think it is something that should be discussed even by 2 virgins before they marry. how many times a week do they anticipate needing sex? I don't know what you'd do if your needs were so very different.

 

[Jaybird3]

Thanks English Lady. I appreciate your thoughts on this subject.

 

[brinkeedinkee]

I think your s/o sex drive is extremely important, as well as your own, as well as the compatibility of those.

 

[midwestyankee]

To be entirely frank, if my partner's drive matched mine I would never have seen this question, or the thread, or entered the world of the Literotica forums.

To have a reasonably good match is quite important, but not everyone can tell when they're young if their match is good or not. At first most young marrieds (or wannabes) are pretty active. It's only when the children and jobs and other responsibilities start piling on that people return to their default modes in their sex drives. And some people simply change as they grow older, which is unpredictable. So even if your sex drives appear to be the same when you meet, they may be quite different only a few years later.

So, while having matching or similar drives is a very good thing, enough communication to understand each other's needs and changing needs is also crucial to the happiness in a marriage. You have the emotional needs of two people, the physical needs of two people, and the inner lives of two people combining to form the reality of the sexual life of the pair. It's quite a complex organism, really, and takes serious attention to keep it thriving and growing.

Not everyone is lucky enough or smart enough to know how to keep that organism thriving.

 

[Cycnus]

Well said, MidWestYankee, well said!!
[size=.5]And for me, this is with having partner whose sex drive well-nigh matches mine, or vice versa or so.[/size]

 

[McKenna]

.