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Like Jim Hawkins in Treasure Island?... The wife is successful in having the pirates to kill each other off until there is only one left. She manages to kill the remaining pirate before reaching back to the sailboat. ...
Okay okay, so like, I used to go to the lake with these other girls, it was me and Theresa and Kristie and Jenny. Theresa's dad had this boat, and we'd all go water skiing. So like, me and Kristie, we're like the Olsen twins, cute, blond, and irritating. Jenny is all tits and legs and blond hair. Theresa is a swimmer, she has short blond hair and an athletic body like me and Kristie. Kristie is a skater, I'm a gymnast.
So anyway, I used to fantasize that these Lake Pirates capture us and take us to this deserted island and ties us up and Do Things to us all night. But I can tell this is way too boring an idea to make a story about.
Love,
Jamie
PS: "Tell them about the Gas Dock Incident, Jamie."
Okay, okay, so we were OOG (Out Of Gas) so we went to this floating gas station. It's run by these Mexicans, and Jenny was bending over putting the gas in, and she was wearing this bikini. Now, Jenny has this fabulous Inter Bubular Groove, when she bends over and you look down her top you can see China, and the smooth creamy sides of her boobs.
So the Mexicans were looking at China and chattering about it. Unfortunately for them, Kristie speaks Spanish. She even knows all the dirty words and shit. So as we were leaving, Kristie is like, "We'll sell you the blond gringo slut for $300."
They were still going through their pockets trying to come up with the $300 when we sped off.