Picky Bottom ISO one-in-a-million Top

[Chicklet]

I'm not expecting much, but I'm bored.

How picky am I, you ask?

I'm looking for:

* males

* within 8 years my senior or 2 years my junior

* who do NOT ride the short-bus

* who are *single* and *monogamous* (that means not married, no current play partners, and not looking to start THE ULTIMATE POLY HOUSEHOLD)

* who have at least an inkling of knowledge about what they're doing, or want to learn

* who live within a four hour drive and don't expect me to drive it just because *I* am the submissive

* who don't believe that "submissive" means I'm going to submit instantly

* who believe in a woman who knows what she wants and isn't afraid to state it as bluntly as possible

* who are not underweight; a little overweight is actually preferred

* who are actually attractive to me

* who would like to meet for coffee and not expect a weekend of sex.

I could probably go on.

My collarme.com profile is dodedo - listed as a 'switch' because it's hard to describe myself.

I am a masochist, a sadist, a bottom, a rope slut, a fun chick, a slacker, a former cook, currently unemployed and bored for at least another week, a social drinker, a non-smoker, a bitch. I like coffee, cats, cereal, movies, books, literotica, men.

I will *NOT* cyber, get on my webcam, even *consider* an online relationship, respond to any disrespectful emails or PM's, fellate you three times a day, exchange sexy emails, show nude photos, or otherwise entertain you sexually until I've met you in person a couple of times.

Scared? You should be. Go ahead and contact me if you think you'd make the cut.

http://a422.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/32/l_8c4be5660a7a7aa73ef17e7d40381905.jpg

 

[Jaded1]

Scared? You should be. Go ahead and contact me if you think you'd make the cut.

http://a422.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/32/l_8c4be5660a7a7aa73ef17e7d40381905.jpg

Make the cut... I am the game... ... It's all about the game and how ya play it, it's all about the gameeeeeee...

 

[useyou]

Analyzing Your Request

So if there is 1 out of 1,000,000 who can "make the cut" as you put it, that means there are 6,000 people worldwide that qualify.

Since 52% are women that leaves 2,880 males.

Since you defined a 10 year age bracelet, I estimate that it's now down to 576 males worldwide.

Out of the 576 probably 60% are married or in a relationship leaving 230.

30% of those do not qualify mentally leaving 403.

Of the 403 70% refuse to treat a woman the way you describe leaving 120.

Of the 120 left, the chances of them even searching for a woman like you is 1%.

So there are 1.2 guys in the entire world who would qualify.

I actually found him, he lives on the top of a mountain in Tibet, was a former monk and he just had a sex change operation last week.

Shit, you have no luck.

 

[useyou]

Make the cut... I am the game... ... It's all about the game and how ya play it, it's all about the gameeeeeee...

Jaded dreamer has just been cut from the team. And he thought he just won the lottery.

 

[CutieMouse]

*stops by with a for Chicklet*

 

[Chicklet]

So if there is 1 out of 1,000,000 who can "make the cut" as you put it, that means there are 6,000 people worldwide that qualify.

Since 52% are women that leaves 2,880 males.

Since you defined a 10 year age bracelet, I estimate that it's now down to 576 males worldwide.

Out of the 576 probably 60% are married or in a relationship leaving 230.

30% of those do not qualify mentally leaving 403.

Of the 403 70% refuse to treat a woman the way you describe leaving 120.

Of the 120 left, the chances of them even searching for a woman like you is 1%.

So there are 1.2 guys in the entire world who would qualify.

I actually found him, he lives on the top of a mountain in Tibet, was a former monk and he just had a sex change operation last week.

Shit, you have no luck.

i'd think that was funny if i hadn't seen it before and knew that you'd just stolen it from someone else

 

[Primalex]

* males

Check.

* within 8 years my senior or 2 years my junior

Check.

* who do NOT ride the short-bus

http://damox.com/cars/thumbs/Toyota/2001_Toyota_Celica.jpg
Check.

* who are *single* and *monogamous*

All the time?

* who have at least an inkling of knowledge about what they're doing, or want to learn

Check.

* who live within a four hour drive and don't expect me to drive it just because *I* am the submissive

How about expecting it because you are the woman?

* who don't believe that "submissive" means I'm going to submit instantly

Check.

* who believe in a woman who knows what she wants and isn't afraid to state it as bluntly as possible

I've never met a woman who still knows what she wanted the next day. Women are fickle.

* who are not underweight;

Check.

* who are actually attractive to me

Uhm..well..hmmm.. check?

* who would like to meet for coffee and not expect a weekend of sex.

Can we meet for sex if I don't expect it? I don't drink coffee.

I am a masochist, a sadist, a bottom, a rope slut, a fun chick, a slacker, a former cook, currently unemployed and bored for at least another week, a social drinker, a non-smoker, a bitch. I like coffee, cats, cereal, movies, books, literotica, men.

I'm a bitch; I'm a lover; I'm a child; I'm a mother; I'm a sinner; I'm a saint..
I like female cooks. For some weird reason, they have exceptional fellatio skills..

I will *NOT* cyber, get on my webcam, even *consider* an online relationship, respond to any disrespectful emails or PM's, fellate you three times a day, exchange sexy emails, show nude photos, or otherwise entertain you sexually until I've met you in person a couple of times.

Ha. You only write this to scare all those schmocks away, right? You know you want to send me pics of your boobs right now!

http://a422.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/32/l_8c4be5660a7a7aa73ef17e7d40381905.jpg

Well, with such fine teeth, if you would be a horse, I would buy you. Really!



(Sorry, I was bored.)

 

[Chicklet]

where are ya at, buddy?

 

[Evil_Geoff]

I'm looking for:

* males

I am

* within 8 years my senior or 2 years my junior

Damn... to old

* who do NOT ride the short-bus

I don't

* who are *single* and *monogamous* (that means not married, no current play partners, and not looking to start THE ULTIMATE POLY HOUSEHOLD)

Well... I'm not married. Yet. Currently monogamous but that's subject to change.

* who have at least an inkling of knowledge about what they're doing, or want to learn

I'm good on this one...

* who live within a four hour drive and don't expect me to drive it just because *I* am the submissive

I'm too far, damn!

* who don't believe that "submissive" means I'm going to submit instantly

Of course not, trust has to be earned.

* who believe in a woman who knows what she wants and isn't afraid to state it as bluntly as possible

No probs there.

* who are not underweight; a little overweight is actually preferred

That's me, a little "chunk style"... Not sure for how long, my cardiologist fussed at me today...

* who are actually attractive to me

I can't answer that one...

* who would like to meet for coffee and not expect a weekend of sex.

Weekend of sex? Hell, I'd be happy with once! How about a weekend of bondage and floggers and other activities? ? ?

I could probably go on.

Oh please do! *LOL*

My collarme.com profile is dodedo - listed as a 'switch' because it's hard to describe myself.

That's okay. I'm easier to describe, so it works out as about average...

I am a masochist, a sadist, a bottom, a rope slut, a fun chick, a slacker, a former cook, currently unemployed and bored for at least another week, a social drinker, a non-smoker, a bitch. I like coffee, cats, cereal, movies, books, literotica, men.

We would get along famously I have no doubt!

I will *NOT* cyber, get on my webcam, even *consider* an online relationship, respond to any disrespectful emails or PM's, fellate you three times a day, exchange sexy emails, show nude photos, or otherwise entertain you sexually until I've met you in person a couple of times.

I guess I'm SOL until I hit the lottery...

Scared? You should be. Go ahead and contact me if you think you'd make the cut.

Hehehehe... To bad your hard limits are where they are. And I'm so poor. If I was independently wealthy, you would be in soooooo much trouble, young lady!

http://a422.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/32/l_8c4be5660a7a7aa73ef17e7d40381905.jpg

I'm not stalking you. Really! I promise!

 

[Chicklet]

Geoff, darling, all things can be negotiated for the right person

 

[Auraka6669]

This personal gets my

*Stamp of approval!*

Not that it means much, but you go girl.

 

[DarkSteven]

I'm male. I aced your first requirement!

 

[useyou]

What a disappointment

i'd think that was funny if i hadn't seen it before and knew that you'd just stolen it from someone else

WTF? You mean I spent 15 minutes thinking of my percentage tidbit and then writing that message and you then accuse me of plagiarism? Now that certainly disappoints me and I believe you owe me an apology.

I also believe I just discovered the real reason why you can't get a man.

Oh and this time THINK before you offend again.

 

[Primalex]

where are ya at, buddy?

I made a girl pay for this answer, so if I tell you this now for free, she would be pissed off. No can do.

 

[Chicklet]

I'm male. I aced your first requirement!

YES!!

Gold star! = )

 

[Chicklet]

Oh and this time THINK before you offend again.

for some reason i'm not really worried about offending people online who i'll never meet. especially when they're aiming to mock my goals. i don't think it's so hard for me to find someone my age, kinky, who i like. god knows i've found them before, it just didn't work out.

marquis said something wonderful to me once: "You should like the person you fuck."

i'd totally do Marquis...

Statistics

More Stats

 

[Primalex]

"You should like the person you fuck."

Before or after?

 

[Chicklet]

Before or after?

both.

i would *never* go to bed with someone i didn't like. never have, never will. and i have this crazy history of remaining friends with everyone i've dated. i even have my very first boyfriend on myspace, lol.

i figure, if i like you enough to date you and sleep with you, then i like you enough to be your friend. pretty crazy, huh?

 

[Mo_gradh]

So if there is 1 out of 1,000,000 who can "make the cut" as you put it, that means there are 6,000 people worldwide that qualify.

Since 52% are women that leaves 2,880 males.

Since you defined a 10 year age bracelet, I estimate that it's now down to 576 males worldwide.

Out of the 576 probably 60% are married or in a relationship leaving 230.

30% of those do not qualify mentally leaving 403.

Of the 403 70% refuse to treat a woman the way you describe leaving 120.

Of the 120 left, the chances of them even searching for a woman like you is 1%.

So there are 1.2 guys in the entire world who would qualify.

I actually found him, he lives on the top of a mountain in Tibet, was a former monk and he just had a sex change operation last week.

Shit, you have no luck.

Omg that was just too funny to me, sad but funny.
*wonders where the stats came from*

 

[Primalex]

i figure, if i like you enough to date you and sleep with you, then i like you enough to be your friend. pretty crazy, huh?

No idea if this is crazy. I don't judge opinions, I only reserve the right to have a different one. I don't mind to fuck a girl that is a backstabbing trashtalking piece of shit, but I wouldn't have her as a friend.

Edit:
I don't expect from the bakery to repair my car either. It's important that I get reasonable bread from the bakery and a reasonable repair from the garage. If it's two in one, fine, but I rather have someone who is superior in one area than mediocre in a lot of areas.

Edit2:
I like your teeth though nevertheless.

 

[Evil_Geoff]

Omg that was just too funny to me, sad but funny.
*wonders where the stats came from*

Probably made up, but that breakdown, or one just like it, has ciruclated on the internet for years. Chicklet has a link to a current version from craigslist up...

 

[WriterDom]

Looking for love in all the wrong places.



There are some good people here. The challenge is finding someone in your general area.

 

[Chicklet]

There are some good people here. The challenge is finding someone in your general area.

Tell me about it.

 

[Chris_Xavier]

Not like you need it

but a bump for a great woman who deserves only the best.

 

[Primalex]

A bump from 3 to 1...you must be really scared.