Pet Peeves

[v_hearts]

So I was bored and reading about 20 different stories at the same time and I found out a few things I really hated (about some of them). I can't stand stories in the second person. God! I want to immerse myself in the story but I'm not Joe whose wife has fucked 20 other guys while I'm hiding in the closet. I read stories to live other people's lives and the second person totally ruins that. Worse if the person that I am supposed to be is the wrong gender well that makes it completely unreadable.

Also I don't like stories in the present tense. I don't really know why and it doesn't seem all that logical but there it is.

So yeah anyone else have things they can't stand? Please don't flame anyone in particular! I don't want to degenerate into a flame war.

 

[sr71plt]

One of my pet peeves is mistaking first person (I) perspective for second person (you).

First person perspective present tense is particularly popular for erotica because it's just about as close to the action as you can get. So be prepared to see a lot of it when you read erotica.

 

[pishp0sh]

I personally hate certain phrases that are used in the stories. If the author is going to refer to a mans penis, call it that.. or call it a cock or a dick. Don't call it a fuck stick. For a woman... call it a pussy or crotch... not a cunt. To me those phrases, and ones like it, are such a HUGE turnoff. Most of the time I won't even finish reading a story when I see them.

 

[1fatcactus]

my petpeev is when a story is alllllll one paragraph and no spaceing i wont even read it give me a headache.

 

[elfin_odalisque]

So I was bored and reading about 20 different stories at the same time and I found out a few things I really hated (about some of them). I can't stand stories in the second person. God! I want to immerse myself in the story but I'm not Joe whose wife has fucked 20 other guys while I'm hiding in the closet. I read stories to live other people's lives and the second person totally ruins that. Worse if the person that I am supposed to be is the wrong gender well that makes it completely unreadable.

Also I don't like stories in the present tense. I don't really know why and it doesn't seem all that logical but there it is.

So yeah anyone else have things they can't stand? Please don't flame anyone in particular! I don't want to degenerate into a flame war.

I agree with you totally. Sr71plt is a skilled writer well worth reading who has the skill to play the difficult side of creative writing and succeed. I enjoy reading him. I will always argue that most of us should avoid first/second person and present tense until we feel we can drive a Ferrari.

For me, second person is mainly a spoken voice, songs, poems and perhaps letters. On literotica, there are two posts that should change your mind that second person pov is always crap;

Shopping for Sex Toys at Walmart by Glynndah

The Second Person by impressive

Sr will disagree, but I feel that a story is always in the past tense and the idea of completion is a fundamental part of that. Sure, present tense fiction can be incredibly erotic, but it needs an understanding of fiction writing that most of us here don't possess.

Lots of guys here have great ideas for stories but let you, as a reader, down by poor execution. There was a great girl around this board a while back, Jenny Jackson, who gave great advice and got this stuff across to newbies better than I can.

If I can make a plea, there are few people these days will give a critique and a bit of advice. If you have a bit of time give a reply to people here who ask for a review.

Elle

 

[Evanly]

Give me more reluctance!

Not sure if I'm in the minority on this one, but I don't like the nonconsent/reluctance story where the woman gets too turned on too quickly. I read these stories because I get turned on by the man being in charge and forceful. I guess I just like my female characters a little more reluctant than that!

 

[Darkniciad]

Not sure if I'm in the minority on this one, but I don't like the nonconsent/reluctance story where the woman gets too turned on too quickly. I read these stories because I get turned on by the man being in charge and forceful. I guess I just like my female characters a little more reluctant than that!

The problem there is that the bar for acceptance based on emotional violence can be a tightrope. Most of the stories that make it fall on the side that you're talking about, the rest tend to fall into the rejected pile because they go a step ( or fifty ) too far. Only a very few can maintain the balance and make it to the platform across the way.

 

[Evanly]

The problem there is that the bar for acceptance based on emotional violence can be a tightrope. Most of the stories that make it fall on the side that you're talking about, the rest tend to fall into the rejected pile because they go a step ( or fifty ) too far. Only a very few can maintain the balance and make it to the platform across the way.

That makes sense, guess I'll just have to write my own.

 

[Submissioness]

I see what you're saying, EVANLY

The problem there is that the bar for acceptance based on emotional violence can be a tightrope. Most of the stories that make it fall on the side that you're talking about, the rest tend to fall into the rejected pile because they go a step ( or fifty ) too far. Only a very few can maintain the balance and make it to the platform across the way.

Literotica will allow a surprisingly high amount of reluctance and violence. I've read some pretty hardcore stories. There is no excuse for the lack or reluctance unless that, of course, what you are trying to achieve. You can write a story and intend for it to be light reluctance that focuses on the girl's internal conflict between her mind and her lust. Or you can have a real reluctance story where force and fear play a bigger role in what you're wanting to reader to experience.

Saying that, I totally understand what Evanly is saying. There can be a middle of the road. And I also agree that I prefer a story where the woman doesn't give in too quickly. It doesn't even have to be violent. But I want that internal conflict that I was talking about to drudge on and on. It makes the story more intense. Allowing her body to overthrow all her other senses too soon makes for a boring story.

 

[Submissioness]

Word Choice is VERY important!!!!

I personally hate certain phrases that are used in the stories. If the author is going to refer to a mans penis, call it that.. or call it a cock or a dick. Don't call it a fuck stick. For a woman... call it a pussy or crotch... not a cunt. To me those phrases, and ones like it, are such a HUGE turnoff. Most of the time I won't even finish reading a story when I see them.

My biggest pet peeve goes along the same lines as this one. I hate when authors will have their characters say things that people in the real world would NEVER say! "I would give my life to spend one night between your creamy thighs, caressing your supple young mounds" WHAT? No one says that! And it's not at ALL sexy! Many people get turned on by how REAL the authors make the characters seem. Please don't make the dialogue cheesy. It makes you look like a bad writer. And it's sad, too, because I've read an amazing story that would have been much better had this silly banter been edited to sound more realistic.

I don't want to see characters calling penises things like crotch rocket, joy stick, fuck stick, rumpleforeskin...

If you want the story to sound serious, use serious words that don't make your work sound cheesy. And if you want your story to be HOT and HORNY and SLEEZY, you can use crazy words if it helps to improve the crazy lust in your story.

 

[sr71plt]

My biggest pet peeve goes along the same lines as this one. I hate when authors will have their characters say things that people in the real world would NEVER say! "I would give my life to spend one night between your creamy thighs, caressing your supple young mounds" WHAT? No one says that! And it's not at ALL sexy! Many people get turned on by how REAL the authors make the characters seem. Please don't make the dialogue cheesy. It makes you look like a bad writer. And it's sad, too, because I've read an amazing story that would have been much better had this silly banter been edited to sound more realistic.

I don't want to see characters calling penises things like crotch rocket, joy stick, fuck stick, rumpleforeskin...

If you want the story to sound serious, use serious words that don't make your work sound cheesy. And if you want your story to be HOT and HORNY and SLEEZY, you can use crazy words if it helps to improve the crazy lust in your story.

I personally agree with your point, but I'll have to note that there's a huge readership out there wanting the fantasy of it over the reality. Barbara Cartland made a mint off of creamy thighs and throbbing members. It's called the Romance genre and it's been piling in money for its authors for centuries.

 

[Submissioness]

I said DIALOGUE, make no mistake.

I personally agree with your point, but I'll have to note that there's a huge readership out there wanting the fantasy of it over the reality. Barbara Cartland made a mint off of creamy thighs and throbbing members. It's called the Romance genre and it's been piling in money for its authors for centuries.

I'm all for fantasy and romance! Absolutely. And I even use the terms "throbbing member." But what I mean is that when one character actually SAYS to another character these things... that's what makes it corny. The DIALOGUE needs to be believable... fantasy or not. As the author, you can describe her thighs as creamy and succulent or her breast as soft and voluptuous but don't have one character saying it to another character.

 

[PurpleTiara]

I know a lot of people disagree, but the measurement thing bugs me. I know, it has been hashed out before, but...'

"Mona was 5 feet, 100 pounds of all woman. Her perfect 44 DDD tits had inches at least an inch and half long. I wasn't sure her petite frame could take my 8 inch fuck stick. I suppose I could jam it in her round ass, but I'm not sure that her ass could take my 5 inch girth."

Too many numbers. Too unrealistic. A 5 foot woman who weights 100 pounds is not going to have 44 DDDs. The numbers are distracting, not titilating. After the horny buzz is gone, it becomes a caricature.

"My wife Lisa is a perfect 12. When we go out, she wears the tightest clothes, emphasizing her 28 inch waist and 32 inch ass. I love the way her 6 inch stilletos make her walk. Her 36 B cups sway from side to side and her legs look about 6 feet tall."

"I love the way Lisa dresses! I love how her mini clings to her classic shape. Her legs go on forever, leading the eye up from her slender ankles, over her gently curved ass to her luscious breasts."

The second example is probably equally bad writing (since it is off the top of my head) but it is a bit more descriptive without reading like the stats on the back of a baseball card. You know that Lisa has a classic, hour glass shape without sounding clinical.

 

[Submissioness]

I know a lot of people disagree, but the measurement thing bugs me. I know, it has been hashed out before, but...'

"Mona was 5 feet, 100 pounds of all woman. Her perfect 44 DDD tits had inches at least an inch and half long. I wasn't sure her petite frame could take my 8 inch fuck stick. I suppose I could jam it in her round ass, but I'm not sure that her ass could take my 5 inch girth."

Too many numbers. Too unrealistic. A 5 foot woman who weights 100 pounds is not going to have 44 DDDs. The numbers are distracting, not titilating. After the horny buzz is gone, it becomes a caricature.

I totally agree with this, Purple. the numbers are distracting. I find myself wishing I had a measuring tape so I'd have some idea of what these people are trying to talk about. Using so many exact numbers probably indicates a lack of ability to creatively describe.

However, I think it's alright to use them sometimes. Just don't depend on them to make up for good descriptive technique.

 

[sr71plt]

I'm all for fantasy and romance! Absolutely. And I even use the terms "throbbing member." But what I mean is that when one character actually SAYS to another character these things... that's what makes it corny. The DIALOGUE needs to be believable... fantasy or not. As the author, you can describe her thighs as creamy and succulent or her breast as soft and voluptuous but don't have one character saying it to another character.

I wasn't clear enough. A lot of Romance writers put it in their dialgoue--and have an audience for it.

I guess my problem is that I think of a peeve as concerning something where someone isn't following a norm. But I can see where other people think of it differently.

I just don't see that it's all that much of a hop, skip, and jump to telling other folks what they can write and read because everyone should do it my way.

That's the same with the next posting down.

I write a whole variety of stories and gauge my audience before I do. First, if I have a character who would naturally focus on measurements as a source of arousal (and a whole bunch of males, at least, do), that character would jolly well use measurements in his dialogue. And beyond that, if I'm writing to arouse a group of readers who are turned on by measurement references, I'll use them in the narrative too.

My readers are more important to me than my pet peeves are to me.

 

[Submissioness]

Separating peeves from critisism.

I guess my problem is that I think of a peeve as concerning something where someone isn't following a norm. But I can see where other people think of it differently.

I just don't see that it's all that much of a hop, skip, and jump to telling other folks what they can write and read because everyone should do it my way.

That's the same with the next posting down.

I write a whole variety of stories and gauge my audience before I do. First, if I have a character who would naturally focus on measurements as a source of arousal (and a whole bunch of males, at least, do), that character would jolly well use measurements in his dialogue. And beyond that, if I'm writing to arouse a group of readers who are turned on by measurement references, I'll use them in the narrative too.

My readers are more important to me than my pet peeves are to me.

A pet peeve is something that just really grates on your nerves. They can even sometimes piss you off. A pet peeve isn't merely a dislike.

You can't help what your peeves are. I don't like silly descriptions in dialogue. I'm not telling you that no one should. I don't like distracting measurements in place of creative description. I'm not saying someone else won't.

When I make a SUGGESTION that I feel will enhance a piece a work or alleviate my pet peeve, it is because I truely believe it to be a better piece. If it turns out that the GOAL (to turn on someone by using specific meaurements) is my peeve, then ignore the suggestion. Easy as that. But if it ISN'T the goal, it should be changed because it really does make the work seem, at least to me, and apparently others, that the author lacks the skills to be descriptive.

Not trying to ruffle your feathers. I just don't think that everyone's pet peeves should be criticized. It's just a pet peeve. And as people have said, if it bothers them, they stop reading. And so do I. But if an author doesn't intend to turn readers away, he or she might listen to the readers suggestions and make some adjustments if they see fit. If the reason why people are not finishing the story is because of something that the author did intentionally, then there are no adjustments to be made. It's just not the story for them. I understand that.

Also, pet peeves don't need a defense. No matter what anyone says, mine are still going to get on my nerves.

 

[sr71plt]

A pet peeve is something that just really grates on your nerves. They can even sometimes piss you off. A pet peeve isn't merely a dislike.

You can't help what your peeves are. I don't like silly descriptions in dialogue. I'm not telling you that no one should. I don't like distracting measurements in place of creative description. I'm not saying someone else won't.

When I make a SUGGESTION that I feel will enhance a piece a work or alleviate my pet peeve, it is because I truely believe it to be a better piece. If it turns out that the GOAL (to turn on someone by using specific meaurements) is my peeve, then ignore the suggestion. Easy as that. But if it ISN'T the goal, it should be changed because it really does make the work seem, at least to me, and apparently others, that the author lacks the skills to be descriptive.

Not trying to ruffle your feathers. I just don't think that everyone's pet peeves should be criticized. It's just a pet peeve. And as people have said, if it bothers them, they stop reading. And so do I. But if an author doesn't intend to turn readers away, he or she might listen to the readers suggestions and make some adjustments if they see fit. If the reason why people are not finishing the story is because of something that the author did intentionally, then there are no adjustments to be made. It's just not the story for them. I understand that.

Also, pet peeves don't need a defense. No matter what anyone says, mine are still going to get on my nerves.

OK. Carry on. I guess my pet peeve is others making their pet peeves public as if someone should do something about them.

 

[Submissioness]

Anyone have an intense pet peeve of misspelled word? I also hate misuse of words like "to, too, two"; "they're, their, there". Punctuation grammar isn't as bad for me as long as the mistakes are few and far between.

 

[Submissioness]

No use talking to those who use ear plugs and a megaphone.

OK. Carry on. I guess my pet peeve is others making their pet peeves public as if someone should do something about them.

Well, if you don't like reading about other people peeves, then why are you in this thread? And yeah, sometimes the author should do something about them! If your story comes off as annoying and you didn't mean for it to, fix it. How fucking wrong is that?! I have a peeve of misspelled words. Should no one care about that either? People want feedback about their work to try learn what the readers like AND DISLIKE!

You are taking everything out of context like I'm telling everyone to only write what I like to read. I don't like incest so I don't read it. It doesn't mean I'm going to leave negative feedback about how I didn't like what a daddy did with his daughter.

I've tried to be mature about this but your sarcastic comments are now quickly becoming a peeve of mine.

 

[sr71plt]

This would be the place to put your pet peeve, then. I post here because writers early in getting their toes into writing erotica come to this thread for ideas/help. I think they should see a balance and shouldn't start off thinking there are hard and fast rules about what they have to/should do to find readers from what they'd like to write. I'm sure you don't intend to give them the impression they are being given "the formula," but my experience is that they tend to get that impression unless some balance in discussion--choices as it were--are offered up.

I've seen more harm done to the development of writing on this "feedback" forum then help--and, yes, I'm a professional writer/editor.

That's why I post to this thread. It is a thing for you that those who disagree with you--or want to give alternate views--in a discussion just shouldn't be posting?

 

[sr71plt]

Anyone have an intense pet peeve of misspelled word? I also hate misuse of words like "to, too, two"; "they're, their, there". Punctuation grammar isn't as bad for me as long as the mistakes are few and far between.

It really bothers me--especially knowing that I so easily do it myself.

 

[Submissioness]

This isn't a Rules Thread, this is a Peeves Thread.

This would be the place to put your pet peeve, then. I post here because writers early in getting their toes into writing erotica come to this thread for ideas/help. I think they should see a balance and shouldn't start off thinking there are hard and fast rules about what they have to/should do to find readers from what they'd like to write. I'm sure you don't intend to give them the impression they are being given "the formula," but my experience is that they tend to get that impression unless some balance in discussion--choices as it were--are offered up.

I've seen more harm done to the development of writing on this "feedback" forum then help--and, yes, I'm a professional writer/editor.

That's why I post to this thread. It is a thing for you that those who disagree with you--or want to give alternate views--in a discussion just shouldn't be posting?

If they want to read about pet peeves, they open this thread. If they want help or ideas, there are other threads for that in the Story Feedback category and other categories.

I encourage alternate views. I encourage free thinking. I encourage discussion. I do not, however, encourage people to tell me which peeves are okay to post in the PET PEEVES thread. My opinions are just that: opinions. If they help you, great. If they don't, no harm done.

Bottom line: You can't talk someone out of having a pet peeve. And if someone asks for feedback, it should be okay to give your opinion. After all, they asked for it. What they do with that advice is their own business. We're all adults here and able to make grown up decisions about our own work. We were discussing the OVERUSE of measurements and the annoying use of silly dialogue. It isn't any more complicated than that.

 

[Evanly]

Has the word "peeve" totally lost meaning for anyone else here but me? Peeve. Peeve. Peeve.

 

[PurpleTiara]

Anyone have an intense pet peeve of misspelled word? I also hate misuse of words like "to, too, two"; "they're, their, there". Punctuation grammar isn't as bad for me as long as the mistakes are few and far between.

I am not bugged as much by this on story sites like Lit as I am with professional publications. Homophones do not trip spell checkers and I struggle with them myself. Not because I am stupid or lazy, but because English is not my first language. Not all of us have a someone close by who can proof our work. Mis-spellings of non homophones do distract me but they do not really peeve me. My limit per story is about 3, unless it is consistent. Like the writer who only misspelled the word "bottle". It was the only word he mis-spelled, but he did 9 times on the first page.

There are three language peeves that do drive me bonkers. First is when you substitute the complete wrong word for something. Stuff like orgasm/organism, dominant/dominate and the like. The second thing is weird wrong verb construction. Whenever I see "she camed hard" or "I commed fast." I go find another story.

Last one is the big big peeve.

I cannot stand that stupid text speech. Basically, if u r 2 lazy 2 make an effort, i m 2 lazy 2 bother. It is sheer laziness, and that is not appealing to me. I sometimes wander the chat side of Lit for story ideas. (Cybersex is boooooring but there is some inspiration there!) I cannot tell you how many times I get PMs from people who call me "u". The big thing for me is the fact that the only people I know who talk that way are children and teens. NOT someone I am interested in talking about sex with. If you text me and start with the text speech, I automatically feel that I am talking with a child, or someone who is just that immature.

 

[dominatrixbarbie]

I completely agree one hundred percent. I mean, honestly, is it so difficult to add TWO extra letters to a word? Does it really take such a shorter period of time to write "c" than it is to write "see"? I've never understood that... maybe in text-messaging on the phone when you're in a rush and you're saying things like, "I'll c u after work" when you aren't even suppose to be using your phone, or in school when, again, you aren't suppose to be using your cellular phone. But on a computer?

Also... does it bother anyone else when there's an excessive use of one particular word, or even description? Sure, there's only a limited amount of explanation you can give about one thing before you're eventually going to sound redundant... but doesn't it become obnoxious to see the same thing repeatedly? When I write, I try to have some variation. I will admit, I'm no where near perfect or a professional, but it comes to me across as if they aren't putting forth much effort when there's something else they could have inserted in that sentence rather than the same danged thing they had put.

Ahem.