Perhaps a silly question, but I'd like some help...

[sixandcounting]

...meeting women. I'm 19, but an "old soul," and I've been I've been quite sure that I am gay since I was 14. I've had one girlfriend, rather serious and awful, as so many first lesbian relationships are, but that was two years ago and I'd like to get on with my love life.
I go to college as well as vocational school, so I'm rather busy. I went to a queer students organization meeting, and all the girls there were freshman, in pairs. It was more than a little pathetic and discouraging. I'm not old enough to go to clubs and bars yet, so that's not an option either.
I know there are other queer women on my campus and in my city... so how do I find them? I'm not looking for a quick fuck, or the One, or something pretty without a brain. I'm looking for someone intelligent that I can connect with as another gay woman, and frankly, without so much as a lesbian book club around, it's difficult.
Ideas?

 

[rosebud_6]

...meeting women. I'm 19, but an "old soul," and I've been I've been quite sure that I am gay since I was 14. I've had one girlfriend, rather serious and awful, as so many first lesbian relationships are, but that was two years ago and I'd like to get on with my love life.
I go to college as well as vocational school, so I'm rather busy. I went to a queer students organization meeting, and all the girls there were freshman, in pairs. It was more than a little pathetic and discouraging. I'm not old enough to go to clubs and bars yet, so that's not an option either.
I know there are other queer women on my campus and in my city... so how do I find them? I'm not looking for a quick fuck, or the One, or something pretty without a brain. I'm looking for someone intelligent that I can connect with as another gay woman, and frankly, without so much as a lesbian book club around, it's difficult.
Ideas?

have you tried meeting someone online?

 

[plesmone]

I know that being bi is not the same, but finding someone is.

College is the best place, especially if you live on campus - that is where I had my first experience and then later at frat parties. I'm not sure where you are in all of this, but sometimes it's easier to find a bi girl.

...meeting women. I'm 19, but an "old soul," and I've been I've been quite sure that I am gay since I was 14. I've had one girlfriend, rather serious and awful, as so many first lesbian relationships are, but that was two years ago and I'd like to get on with my love life.
I go to college as well as vocational school, so I'm rather busy. I went to a queer students organization meeting, and all the girls there were freshman, in pairs. It was more than a little pathetic and discouraging. I'm not old enough to go to clubs and bars yet, so that's not an option either.
I know there are other queer women on my campus and in my city... so how do I find them? I'm not looking for a quick fuck, or the One, or something pretty without a brain. I'm looking for someone intelligent that I can connect with as another gay woman, and frankly, without so much as a lesbian book club around, it's difficult.
Ideas?

 

[bi golly]

Don't go online. It is a wasteland.

You went to the queer student's meeting and they were all pairs. Well, they might have a friend who isn't part of a couple.

Be a friend. Make friends. Finding someone to be your friend, then your lover, is the best path.

 

[sixandcounting]

I find online dating intimidating and overwhelming- it requires that I advertise myself, which I'm not comfortable with, and I'd much rather someone's first impression of me be one that they draw from interacting with me, not from reading canned statements on the internet. Plus, how many strangers can access an online dating profile? It's a little scary to me.
thank you for your input, though.

have you tried meeting someone online?

 

[sixandcounting]

Bi women are fine, but I don't know that that makes them easier to find...
Frat parties aren't really my scene. I'm more of a library-going, theatre arts kind of girl (and cast parties don't work, because I already know everyone there.) thanks, though.

I know that being bi is not the same, but finding someone is.

College is the best place, especially if you live on campus - that is where I had my first experience and then later at frat parties. I'm not sure where you are in all of this, but sometimes it's easier to find a bi girl.

 

[SweetErika]

I find online dating intimidating and overwhelming- it requires that I advertise myself, which I'm not comfortable with, and I'd much rather someone's first impression of me be one that they draw from interacting with me, not from reading canned statements on the internet. Plus, how many strangers can access an online dating profile? It's a little scary to me.
thank you for your input, though.

Putting dating aside for a moment, have you sought local friends online? I've met some wonderful ladies on here, through Craigslist, OKCupid and networking groups. I always look for friendship with like-minded people first, and then if there happens to be a connection (or one develops over time), we can go from there. No pressure, no expectations.

Friends could have other friends who are perfect for you, or maybe you'd just find some satisfaction in relating to other queer women or it could lead to starting the type of group you'd like to see in your area.

Yeah, you have to put yourself out there and put in some effort to get results, but you're likely to meet some awesome women you might not ever meet otherwise.

So, my advice is to break out of your box a little bit and try some new things, like seeing who's online and advertising yourself as the intelligent woman you seem to be. Trying different approaches is likely how you're going to get what you want.

 

[SydneyScorpio]

It's always difficult going out specifically to find a partner. You usually meet your future partner by accident, or by being set up on a blind date by friends. Try to think of a few things that interest you, whether they are movies, live concerts, etc, then go out to them with just the idea of enjoyment in mind. You'll be surprised how soon you meet someone who has similar interests. Don't fret about it though. There's someone out there for everyone and your special someone is still out there waiting, and looking, for you now. Best wishes

I find online dating intimidating and overwhelming- it requires that I advertise myself, which I'm not comfortable with, and I'd much rather someone's first impression of me be one that they draw from interacting with me, not from reading canned statements on the internet. Plus, how many strangers can access an online dating profile? It's a little scary to me.
thank you for your input, though.

 

[SydneyScorpio]

It might also be an idea if you put just a little more information in your biography. Try stating where you're located. Maybe start with your city, or just your state if that makes you a little more comfortable. Put a few of your interests in there. Tell people about the type of person that interests you. Tell people what you expect from a relationship. But, for your own peace of mind, get everyone to reply through PMs and don't give access to your email address until you feel sure that you want to take the contact further. Your safety & security is paramount when dealing with people through the internet and you should always follow your heart, and mind, when making the decision to take it that one step further. Best wishes in your quest.