Out of the mouths of babes...

[SweetCherry]

So, I'm sitting here surfing with the tv on in the background. My 6 year old daughter is kicked back on the sofa, watching. All of a sudden, she asked me "Mama, do boys marry boys sometimes?" I wasn't paying attention to what she was watching, but something was mentioned about a man marrying another man. Now, my daughter is 6 years old, soon to be 7. She's a bright and inquisitive child, who not too long ago asked me what "fag" meant. She'd seen it on TV and on some of the playground equiptment at school. Being the ever socially conscious mom that I am, I've always tried my best to explain things to her properly.

So, there I sit, explaining how yes, indeed, some boys DO marry boys and some girls DO marry girls, tho there's a lot of places where it's not allowed cuz some people think it's bad. She just looked at me and said "That's stupid, Mama." Me, being the mom who makes them explain everything said "What's stupid?" Her response was "It's stupid that some people can't get married."

I like how my daughter thinks.

 

[glamorilla]

apple don't fall far from the tree.

 

[Ms_Lilith]

That's great, SC... I hope that when I have children, I'm able to educate them like you have yours..

And it's truly nice to see an open parent, after how I was raised. Everything was a sin, and everything was evil, and nothing was meant to be talked about in my 'proper' Catholic home.

I hope to be able to speak to my children like you spoke to yours.

 

[SweetCherry]

Heh. Very true, Glam. I just think it's the parents who teach the kdis what they're tolerant of and what they're not. It's up to me to make sure she's smart enough to know that what society (or some rather thick skulled cretins) thinks isn't always right.

 

[SweetCherry]

That's great, SC... I hope that when I have children, I'm able to educate them like you have yours..

And it's truly nice to see an open parent, after how I was raised. Everything was a sin, and everything was evil, and nothing was meant to be talked about in my 'proper' Catholic home.

I hope to be able to speak to my children like you spoke to yours.

Vixen, this is also a child who at 5, asked me what that "thing" on her was...meaning her clitoris. I didn't hold back then, answering her questions vaguely at first, then getting more specific as she kept getting more demanding to KNOW. By the end of the conversation she knew what she had, that all girls had them and that yes, sometimes people DO touch them and yes, it does feel good soemtime. I also told her it wasn't something she shoudl do in front of everyone.

I've always tried to keep open lines of communication with the kids. Start young, and they'll ask as they get older. Deny them what they want to know, and they're going to get their questions answered from someone else who might not know the truth. Be it in what they have attached to their bodies or what smoking does to their bodies or why those 2 girls are kissing. They might be short and still learning, but hey, a lot of people forget kids ARE really people too.

 

[Bandit58]

My kids are 20 and 15 now, my son has left home and my daughter lives with her father after we split up in April last year. I've always answered their questions openly and honestly, like "Mum, what's a condom?" (daughter aged 6) or "How do you catch Aids" (daughter again, slightly older).

Now I find the best conversations we have are in the car. Living in the country it's at least half an hour drive to get anywhere. If she's embarrassed she doesn't have to look at me, and my eyes are on the road so it's easier not to blush when I'm explaining something At least I've made sure she knows she can come to me or ring me up if she needs to ask anything........

My own upbringing was very inhibited, I remember asking my mother what a period was when I was about 9 years old and she wouldn't tell me "Wait until you're older" was what she said.....and when she did finally tell me (I was about 12 I think) she made it seem dirty and icky which coloured my thinking about everything connected with sex for years. At 16 I had a crush on a girl at school.......confused, ashamed, afraid.....no one to talk to about it.....if I'd had someone to talk to maybe my life would have turned out a hell of a lot different

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

So, there I sit, explaining how yes, indeed, some boys DO marry boys and some girls DO marry girls, tho there's a lot of places where it's not allowed cuz some people think it's bad. She just looked at me and said "That's stupid, Mama." Me, being the mom who makes them explain everything said "What's stupid?" Her response was "It's stupid that some people can't get married."

I like how my daughter thinks.

I have to say i love how your child thinks as well. My children and i have an extrememly open relationship. I feel that children understand a whole lot more than adults give them credit for. I have never hidden my girl friends from my kids...and my 12 year old son thinks that mommy is cool cuz she can get prettier, smarter females than most guys he knows!! I used to worry about how my 2 girls would deal with it...but they take it all in stride, just happy that mommy is happy. I think by the next generation..if every openminded adult teaches his/her children acceptance of others and pride in themselves...well who knows how much better the world will be for them!!!
Great idea for a thread...
PET

 

[Etoile]

That is great! What was she watching when she asked?

 

[SweetCherry]

Actually, it was Drew Carey where Drew agrees to marry Mr Wick to allow him to stay in the country.

The "fag" question a couple weeks ago came from, as i said, something she'd seen at school and an episode of Dawson's Creek.

 

[Etoile]

Heh! And here I thought it would be the news, or something. Then again I don't suppose many six-year-olds watch the news.

 

[SweetCherry]

Nope, my 6 year old is addicted to Drew Carey and Dawson's Creek, much like I am. She's a little dork, but she has good taste in music, if you can overlook her Pink and Britney Spears interest. At least now she's liking Sophie B Hawkins and Melissa Etheridge, too.

 

[BlueSugar]

If children at the age of 6 see no problem ... why should people in their 30's? People need to think back when every color in the crayon box was awesome and pots and pans could be made into aaaaaaaanything.

 

[Effigy]

Nope, my 6 year old is addicted to Drew Carey and Dawson's Creek, much like I am. She's a little dork, but she has good taste in music, if you can overlook her Pink and Britney Spears interest. At least now she's liking Sophie B Hawkins and Melissa Etheridge, too.

I only had so much time to train her.

 

[SweetCherry]

I only had so much time to train her.

Bah, she only likes Dawson's cuz of Joey. She always gets a kick when the open credits go and she sees "Katie".

 

[deliciously_naughty]

People often underestimate children. I worked in a 3rd grade classroom this past year and taught a unit on the Civil War...one of my "essential questions" was "What is the difference between freedom and equality" and the kids got it. Parents were unsure if it was too sophisticated, but my students got exactly what I was hoping for...that "freeing" black people didn't mean that their lives became perfect and equal. They understood that the war affected people (and kids) lives very differently. And they understood that African Americans helped to free themselves rather than act merely as passive players waiting for the white people to come and free them, as most books portray them.

I think the same thing applies to most anything...I try to be honest and open with my students, to the limits of what I'm allowed to say (district has regs) and I imagine with my own kids I'll be even more open and honest with them.

 

[James G 5]

Nope, my 6 year old is addicted to Drew Carey and Dawson's Creek, much like I am. She's a little dork, but she has good taste in music, if you can overlook her Pink and Britney Spears interest. At least now she's liking Sophie B Hawkins and Melissa Etheridge, too.

HEY!
What's wrong w/Pink??????

Geez......I am getting a flashback to 1989, buying my g/f at the time a Melissa Ehtridge album (on cassette LOL)
We listened to it & I said "She's a LESBIAN!"
My girlfriend said "How do you know?"
I explained that I listened to the lyrics & could just TELL
She refused to believe me until Melissa came out......

 

[SweetCherry]

HEY!
What's wrong w/Pink??????

Heh. Nothing, til you listen to a 6 year old singing "I'm coming up so ya better get this party started" hour after hour.

Seriously tho, I'm just glad to have the opportunity to make at least 2 more kids in this world be more socially aware and tolerant. I'm very proud of both of my children and of the kind of people they're growing into. They're bright, and well manered, for the most part. They have their days where I'd quite happily sell them to the gypsies, but I also think ALL parents have those days. In the end, I'd be seriously lacking in my parenting ability if I didn't educate them properly. Nevermind the fact that the kids might start asking a whole lot MORE questions when my girlfriend comes around.