Open Marrige
- Thread starter ed1957
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bisexplicit
but i'm a lesbian
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You can't get her to.
If she feels comfortable with it, then it might happen.
If she feels comfortable with it, then it might happen.
EJFan
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i'm not a woman.... and i'm not married... but i love to type...
like bi said, you can't GET a woman (or anyone for that matter) to do anything really... a person is either inclined to do something or they're not. if she's receptive to the idea, the only way to find out is to bring it up in conversation and see what she has to say about it. talk about it like you'd talk about anything else... open, honest and respectfully.
and, if you can't do that, then maybe you need to think about whether you're with the right woman?
like bi said, you can't GET a woman (or anyone for that matter) to do anything really... a person is either inclined to do something or they're not. if she's receptive to the idea, the only way to find out is to bring it up in conversation and see what she has to say about it. talk about it like you'd talk about anything else... open, honest and respectfully.
and, if you can't do that, then maybe you need to think about whether you're with the right woman?
Vixandra
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You can't make her the type of girl who'd accept an open relationship if she isn't one. You'll just alienate her and she'll hate you.
Of course, who knows. She may set a limit that you're stuck with your own gender if you're not sleeping with her. That'd be fair, right?
Of course, who knows. She may set a limit that you're stuck with your own gender if you're not sleeping with her. That'd be fair, right?
AppleBiter
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bisexplicit said:
Yep. Well said.
SweetErika
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Ditto to all of the above.
I'd also venture to say a lot will depend on the reason(s) you want to open the relationship and the health of your marriage. If things aren't so great and you're just looking because the sex is lacking or you want to screw around with a clear conscience, there's a high chance it'll just push along the demise of the relationship. If that's the case, focus on improving and/or reevaluating your marriage. I'm not discouraging communication, but the suggestion alone could be enough to make many people feel very hurt and suspicious.
On the other hand, if your bond, sex life, and communication are excellent, and you're both looking for added spice, to explore your sexuality, or polyamory, with a ton of extra trust and communication, you'll likely have a better chance at suggesting, giving it a try and making it work.
I'd also venture to say a lot will depend on the reason(s) you want to open the relationship and the health of your marriage. If things aren't so great and you're just looking because the sex is lacking or you want to screw around with a clear conscience, there's a high chance it'll just push along the demise of the relationship. If that's the case, focus on improving and/or reevaluating your marriage. I'm not discouraging communication, but the suggestion alone could be enough to make many people feel very hurt and suspicious.
On the other hand, if your bond, sex life, and communication are excellent, and you're both looking for added spice, to explore your sexuality, or polyamory, with a ton of extra trust and communication, you'll likely have a better chance at suggesting, giving it a try and making it work.
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Turn Mormon.
Eilan
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At the risk of sounding like one of Rush Limbaugh's Dittoheads, I'm gonna have to say ditto to all of the above as well.SweetErika said:
I just mentioned this in another recent thread, but my husband's ex-wife, after cheating on him repeatedly, suggested that they have an open marriage. He was completely opposed to it and saw it as a way for her to continue to fuck other people without the guilt she was feeling at that time.
Although she was getting ready to move out of their house when my hubby and I met (AND had told him that she wanted him to move on and be happy), she was not happy at all when she found out about me, even though she was leaving to move in with the guy she was seeing.
In light of that, I don't think that she could have handled an open marriage.
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