Oops I am a guru-a non-incestual one at that!

[Earthgoddess]

Well I needed to thank Earthmuffin,my spiritual twin, for pointing out that my guru title has finally arrived. And to think I missed it!
Well here I am a guru, and I don't feel any different. But as it is only a few days before my birthday I will take this gift of enlightenement and go off and meditate about it. Even as I type this I am sitting in the lotus position aligning all of my chakras and breathing with full oceanic breathes as I Reiki myself-and look, I seemed to have lost my trademark ellispes, oh my God I am so enlightened I refuse to check and make sure I spelled that correctly.
I am definitely feeling like inviting everyone over for soem herbal tea and maybe a soothing massage. I mean for me-that is my idea of a party-everyone comes over and massages me. Yup enlightenment is great!
But as I feel the need to create something profound at this point here goes-

Literotica Dim Sum
Like a dumpling rolled in the papery skins of eternity-
I sit plumpy waiting for my inevitable devouring.
Will the pungent sauces sear my flesh or
moisten my own cravings for the chopsticks' attention?
Can a simple phrase satisy the hunger of a soul?
How can a morsel feed a starving man-I know not.
So here I shall sit, steaming and full of unknown
delicacies awaiting your whim.
And the sweet agony of your chopsticks and then...

the answer will be mine.


I thank you all for attending my guru party-please help yourselves to the tea.

 

[Nobody Special's wife]

CONGRATS!!!!

CONGRATS to you have a good time being a guru I wish I was there to be one too ...But I have a while to go

 

[Juliangel]

Congrats!!!!

You do know that all the other Gurus get to spank you 500 times.

Hey CB I found the paddle

http://animationfactory.fortunecity.com/animations/sports/miscellaneous/ping_pong_paddle_md_wht.gif

 

[Earthmuffin]

Soothing breath in....cleansing breath out.....

Ok, I brought some lavendar and vanilla massage oil for you Earthgoddess. Congratulations on your guruship. I'll be in the corner sipping tea and keeping an eye on the oven. Big congratulations!

 

[CW]

Congrats!!!!

You do know that all the other Gurus get to spank you 500 times.

Hey CB I found the paddle

http://animationfactory.fortunecity.com/animations/sports/miscellaneous/ping_pong_paddle_md_wht.gif

No guru here,,, But can I watch??? UH??? Pretty please???

 

[Hecate]

Congrats Earthgoddess - darling!!!

.. but can I now have back the less enlightened but ohhh soo much fun EG again???

*chuckles* as for the massage .. that sure sounds a good Idea but aren'T you afraid your "enlightenment" will rub off on all of us too easily??

*hug* hope to see you around a little more often again so you reach the 1000 somewhat faster baby!!!

 

[Xander]

Congrats Eathgoddess

Now, I know I'm not a Guru anymore....but can I use the paddle anyways??

 

[Ravenloft]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY EARTHGODDESS!!!
*Said like frosty the snowman*
Er... Happy guruhood I mean... Hehehe!
You made me sad though... I made a thread all about you "Pretty Pagans" just the other day and you never posted babe!
Ah well thats alright... I guess... *Sniffle, sob, sniffle*
I don't feel hurt... *Sniffle, sniffle* Not one bit...
So as was said before, welcome to guruhood (I like the sound of that) Guruhood... HEheh! I kill me sometimes! I am just to funny! HAW HAW HAWWWWW!!! *Shaking my head to clear the mothballs out of there. Napthaline... You gots to love it... Makes the ol engine growl! Heheh!

How about that I am the only guy that can try to shake out of a tangent to (Get this) go flying right off into another like a screaming banshee... Ah well... What was this about again? Oh! Thats right... Earthgoddess's guruhood... Heheh! I knew that! Welcome aboard you fine foxy thang! I just can't wait to see what you choose as a title for yourself in 490 more posts or so!!! Heheh! Oh and *Sniffle* I missed you in *Sniffle* my *Sniffle* "Pretty Pagan" thread...

...
...
...
...
*Sniffle*

 

[CelestialBody]

 

[Ravenloft]

Heheh! Fooled you CelestialBody, its not really her birthday! She just became a Guru is all! Heheh!

 

[Lovely Latina]

EG's a guru?

Well it's about freakin' time! Man o man!

You took so durn long that all we have left are the recycled, hand-me-down guru diapers...a bit soiled...but they still got some *stick* left in 'em.

I've missed your story-telling and fantastic sense of humor around here, EG. Hope you'll stick around to make it to 1000 with me in ohhh...shall we shoot for 2005?

Congrats, hon.

LL

 

[CelestialBody]

 

[Earthgoddess]

Thank you all!!

Okay I've got on my guru diapers-or is that guru nappies?
And I am very ready for the spankings...hubba hubba!!!!

 

[Merelan]

No spankings from me. How about 500 coupons for free massage? Or kisses? I couldn't bear to spank you.
How is the hubby? And that little one armed pirate?

 

[Guest]

Way to Go goddess!

 

[ShyGuy68]

Earthgoddess congrats with the guruship! You truely deserve it!! And I also want to wish you a happy birthday in advance!!

now I wouldn't mind giving you both a spanking and a massage!!

 

[Svedish_Chef]

No spankings from me. How about 500 coupons for free massage? Or kisses? I couldn't bear to spank you.

Hmmm really?


Congrats, and I will always take a massage offer up... ALWAYS!

 

[Earthgoddess]

wow spankings and massages!

Well thanks again all-I am typing this after a lovely birthday celebration so here is my first official post of my new age-I adore birthdays!!! all the cake and ice cream-and I do soooo love presents-I got some grand ones-hand made cards are the best-especially when written by a newly 2 armed pirate!
I am off to try out this new 33 year old body-gotta make sure all the model updates are up to par-new industry standards after all-and maybe I can cajole a massage on top of the lovely presents-night all!

 

[CelestialBody]

 

[Thumper]

Didja know....

..a few members on here went from Virgin to over 1000 in the time it took you to get from 450 to 500!!!

..and said about half as much

Don't toy with the idea of entering any races soon sweet thing...but that is OK by me...I prefer quality to quantity(my lovers are lucky!they get both hehe)..just stop by little more often.....Please?

Congratulations..

 

[lala]

ya know that's funny, i haven't so much of thumper lately either,... but i could be smokin' crack,... anyhow, i'm here to give the goddess her due- happy dances!
http://cgi.tripod.com/smilecwm/cgi-bin/s/asian/pbubbles.gif
http://cgi.tripod.com/smilecwm/cgi-bin/s/asian/blobflower.gif http://cgi.tripod.com/smilecwm/cgi-bin/s/asian/pcheers1.gif http://cgi.tripod.com/smilecwm/cgi-bin/s/asian2/pcomputer.gif
http://cgi.tripod.com/smilecwm/cgi-bin/s/asian2/pdancing.gif http://cgi.tripod.com/smilecwm/cgi-bin/s/asian2/pflower.gif http://cgi.tripod.com/smilecwm/cgi-bin/s/asian3/pmimikon.gif
http://cgi.tripod.com/smilecwm/cgi-bin/s/asian2/phearts.gif

 

[Earthgoddess]

The happy dances are terrifying to me!!!! Thumper-you never call, you never write-when is the last time we sat down for cheesecake-hunh??? you are worse than a jewish mother-and I love it!!!!!!