pdx39
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Dec 5, 2001
- Posts
- 256
On a traditional ranch:
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.
On a Feudal ranch:
You have two cows.
Your lord takes some of the milk.
On a Fascist ranch:
You have two cows.
The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk.
On a Communist ranch:
You have two cows.
Your neighbors help take care of them and you share the milk.
On a Totalitarian ranch:
You have two cows.
The government takes them both and denies they ever existed and drafts you into the army.
Milk is banned.
On the Enron ranch:
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States from Texas, leaving you with nine cows.
No balance sheet is provided with the release of the annual report.
The public buys your bull and you use a small portion of your profits to buy Congress's support for deregulating all transactions involving cows.
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.
On a Feudal ranch:
You have two cows.
Your lord takes some of the milk.
On a Fascist ranch:
You have two cows.
The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk.
On a Communist ranch:
You have two cows.
Your neighbors help take care of them and you share the milk.
On a Totalitarian ranch:
You have two cows.
The government takes them both and denies they ever existed and drafts you into the army.
Milk is banned.
On the Enron ranch:
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States from Texas, leaving you with nine cows.
No balance sheet is provided with the release of the annual report.
The public buys your bull and you use a small portion of your profits to buy Congress's support for deregulating all transactions involving cows.
