on cheating and kinks

[HedonistX]

I don't want to bug you people in details, so I'll just give you tldr and if you have any questions ask me here on over DMs. Not doing this as I think like I'm doing something wrong, sexual morals are low with me... nor I ask for your approval. Maybe advice, guidance or just talk of some kind.

So, tldr: I'm almost 50 now, fit as fuck, horny as fuck. Married with a couple of kids. She's vanilla, has a let's say normal sex drive and is not into kinky stuff. Kinda we have sex few times per week, or we make out with bj/hj. But, I'm a perverted horny fuck. Over the years I've cheated her a number of times, had some ONSs, and a few long term lovers. All those affairs were completely sexual, those girls were nymphomaniacs of the best kind, as it was something I needed and was looking for. Free use sluts, in the most beautiful meaning of the word. I'm not at all in BDSM, but some of them loved being dominated, slapped, choked, stuff like that. Made em cum easier. Plus piss, squirt and stuff like that...

Wife suspects nothing as our life/work was always good enough for me to cheat with no issues. I work as an engineer and have traveled around the world for project needs. Some lasted from few months to even half a year, so imagine what kind of relationships you can build with girls/women with that kind of freedom.

Besides being a pervert in real life fucking, I've joined this site as I love incest. Have to say never done anything in real life and am against underage and molesting stuff, but am approving con incest between adults. And incest stories I read here which are fabulous. Real life - I've met only a few girls with whoom I could talk about it, as they're either open or had some experiences. Did a hell lot of real life roleplay, some even before I knew those existed (when I was a teen I fucked a milf who wanted to call her mommy, and I was there for the pussy).

If there are perverts here, do you approve or judge me? Are there morally straight people here who think I'm an asshole? I don't need to hear "think about her" stuff, I did, of course I did. Sha has a happy life. Has her hobbies and gets from me all the love and care she needs. It's my needs that were always the issue. If you want to know more, ask...

 

[Shyguywithsecrets]

Judgment free zone here!

 

[Anita669]

Also, we like perverts (and incest).

 

[BillyWalrus]

Of course you have come to the right place. That should be evident by now. There is nothing more popular on Lit than incest. Except maybe cuckoldry.

 

[Shyguywithsecrets]

Also, we like perverts (and incest).

I am a shy pervert myself

 

[SirSparky]

I am a shy pervert myself

Aren't we all

 

[Britva415]

What do you want to hear?

 

[HedonistX]

What do you want to hear?

That would be like talking to myself.

 

[write_or_wrong]

I don't think you're over the line on anything; you happen to be a risk taker and it sounds like you know the risks. Beware of the conquest who decides she wants more of you than you can risk. A woman scorned ... And, I'm not sure of this but I think even consensual adult incest is illegal in some states.

 

[ericalauren]

Your OP gives me the impression that you are content with being a cheater and that you’re looking for validation here. That’s terrible. Cheating is bad, point blank.

 

[maveric74]

I don't want to bug you people in details, so I'll just give you tldr and if you have any questions ask me here on over DMs. Not doing this as I think like I'm doing something wrong, sexual morals are low with me... nor I ask for your approval. Maybe advice, guidance or just talk of some kind.

So, tldr: I'm almost 50 now, fit as fuck, horny as fuck. Married with a couple of kids. She's vanilla, has a let's say normal sex drive and is not into kinky stuff. Kinda we have sex few times per week, or we make out with bj/hj. But, I'm a perverted horny fuck. Over the years I've cheated her a number of times, had some ONSs, and a few long term lovers. All those affairs were completely sexual, those girls were nymphomaniacs of the best kind, as it was something I needed and was looking for. Free use sluts, in the most beautiful meaning of the word. I'm not at all in BDSM, but some of them loved being dominated, slapped, choked, stuff like that. Made em cum easier. Plus piss, squirt and stuff like that...

Wife suspects nothing as our life/work was always good enough for me to cheat with no issues. I work as an engineer and have traveled around the world for project needs. Some lasted from few months to even half a year, so imagine what kind of relationships you can build with girls/women with that kind of freedom.

Besides being a pervert in real life fucking, I've joined this site as I love incest. Have to say never done anything in real life and am against underage and molesting stuff, but am approving con incest between adults. And incest stories I read here which are fabulous. Real life - I've met only a few girls with whoom I could talk about it, as they're either open or had some experiences. Did a hell lot of real life roleplay, some even before I knew those existed (when I was a teen I fucked a milf who wanted to call her mommy, and I was there for the pussy).

If there are perverts here, do you approve or judge me? Are there morally straight people here who think I'm an asshole? I don't need to hear "think about her" stuff, I did, of course I did. Sha has a happy life. Has her hobbies and gets from me all the love and care she needs. It's my needs that were always the issue. If you want to know more, ask...

All good by me. We are consensual adults indulging in kinks that our partners are not into. Can't change the way you feel or want to experience sexual desires so as long as no one is getting hurt (emotionally) in the process, it's ok. Lit is pretty non-judgemental so you are safe to share here..I think anyways. Personally not into incest myself but hey you do you! If your wife/partner was into the kinks you mentioned, would that change anything? Or would you still go out looking for other women?

 

[HotWifeOC]

I am a shy pervert myself

Do tell

 

[discjockey74]

 

[Shyguywithsecrets]

Do tell

I enjoy taboo, I have 2 insanely hot sisters and a hot cousin. I jerk in off often to their pictures or when I hear them talk. They have lovely voices.

 

[OldDogMD]

No judgements here! My wife has never been sexually adventurous and has lost interest. So I've done as you have and will continue to satisfy my kink needs when with whom ever I can.

 

[HotWifeOC]

No judgements here! My wife has never been sexually adventurous and has lost interest. So I've done as you have and will continue to satisfy my kink needs when with whom ever I can.

 

[coffeelover5]

@HotWifeOC

 

[JohnS3]

No judgement here either.

I'm sort of in the same position (no pun intended) as the OP but 20 years older. Wife of 45 years was pretty vanilla since we met and has turned even more as the years go by. But the more she shys away from any kink and sex in general, the more I want both- sex and kinky stuff.

As of right now I have avoided any MF type action outside of our marriage but have found a submissive guy who is OK with pretty much anything other than pain (that's not my direction either).

While I am going to great lengths to ever having my wife find out about this, if meeting with this sub can use up some of my desire it will dampen a bit of the burning lust inside me.

 

[PervertedLover]

I believe our bodies know what they want, despite what society brainwashes us into calling right or wrong. Life is too short to deny ourselves what we really desire.

But what do I know?! I’m a Perverted Lover and my lust grows more wicked with age. Before I die I want to experience it all.

 

[Gone_and_Back]

Not into incest at all personally but my husband has a cousin, who he isn't a blood relation to, who acted really strangely around me the first few times I met her. She was jealous and overly critical of me. He admitted to me later that they had sex once about four years before we met. they were both in their late 20's at the time. It shifted the dynamic in their relationship to a strange grey zone they never got out of. Now they don't speak and haven't in years. I think some things work out better as a fantasy than the way they play out in the real world.

 

[Danielsub]

Not into incest at all personally but my husband has a cousin, who he isn't a blood relation to, who acted really strangely around me the first few times I met her. She was jealous and overly critical of me. He admitted to me later that they had sex once about four years before we met. they were both in their late 20's at the time. It shifted the dynamic in their relationship to a strange grey zone they never got out of. Now they don't speak and haven't in years. I think some things work out better as a fantasy than the way they play out in the real world.

And that's why people die from choking

 

[Gone_and_Back]

And that's why people die from choking

One partner did that to me without asking, I never saw or spoke to him again. Kind of important to work things like that out in advance and have a safety strategy in place.

 

[flameinsidesoul]

You asked for no judgment, so I'll offer none. But I will offer something perhaps more useful: a mirror.

You've built two parallel lives. One, the engineer, the husband, the father... providing love, care, hobbies, a happy wife who suspects nothing. The other, the "perverted horny fuck"... traveling the world, finding nymphomaniacs, free-use sluts, women who want to be dominated, choked, pissed on. You've kept these lives separate for years. You're fit, successful, and you've never been caught.

You're not asking for permission. You're not asking for absolution. You're asking: am I alone? Do others understand?

You're not alone.

There are many men and women who live this split. The public self that meets obligations. The private self that craves something the marriage cannot provide. You chose infidelity over frustration, over resentment, over divorcing a woman you still want to protect from the truth. That's a choice. You live with it.

But here's what I notice in your post that you may not have intended to reveal.

The thing you didn't say​

You said your wife is vanilla, normal drive, not into kinky stuff. You said you have sex a few times a week, plus blowjobs, handjobs.

That's not a dead bedroom. That's an active sex life.

You're not cheating because she withholds. You're cheating because what she offers however loving, however frequent doesn't touch the part of you that needs to dominate, to degrade, to be called "mommy" by a milf, to read incest stories and roleplay the taboo. That's not her failing...thats Your nature.

You've accepted that about yourself. You don't apologize for it. You've structured your life career, travel, discretion to accommodate it. That's a level of self-awareness many never reach.

The question you didn't ask​

You said you've thought about her. You've decided she's happy. You've decided the truth would hurt her more than your hidden life.

But here's the question you didn't ask yourself in this post:
What happens when you can't travel anymore? When the projects end, when retirement comes, when you're home every night?

Will the itch fade? Or will you find new ways riskier ways to scratch it?

The other question: Does she really suspect nothing? Or has she chosen not to know? Some wives do. They build their own parallel life... the one where they don't have to confront what they'd rather not see.

What I think you're actually looking for​

Not approval or judgment....You're looking for witness.

You've lived this double life for years, probably decades. You've never told anyone the full truth not your buddies, not your lovers (they only get the version that serves the fantasy), certainly not your wife. You came here, to an anonymous forum, to say it out loud. Not to be absolved. To be seen.

So here it is:

I see you. The engineer. The pervert. The husband who fucks his wife and then fucks strangers. The man who reads incest stories and wonders what that says about him. The man who built a life that works, even if it's built on secrets.

You're not a monster. You're not a saint. You're a man who decided, long ago, that his needs mattered enough to risk the life he built. Every day since, you've managed that risk. That's not advice. It's just what I see.

A final thought​

You said sexual morals are low with you. I don't think that's true. I think you have a different moral code one that prioritizes your wife's happiness (as you define it) and your own fulfillment, even if that means deception. That's not low morals. That's trade-offs.

The only person who could truly judge you is your wife and she doesn't know.

So the judgment you're really asking for is your own and only you can decide if the life you've built two lives, really is one you can live with to the end.

 

[Samantha47]

Also, we like perverts (and incest).

Sounds good me too

 

[paulman999]

No judgement here either.

I'm sort of in the same position (no pun intended) as the OP but 20 years older. Wife of 45 years was pretty vanilla since we met and has turned even more as the years go by. But the more she shys away from any kink and sex in general, the more I want both- sex and kinky stuff.

As of right now I have avoided any MF type action outside of our marriage but have found a submissive guy who is OK with pretty much anything other than pain (that's not my direction either).

While I am going to great lengths to ever having my wife find out about this, if meeting with this sub can use up some of my desire it will dampen a bit of the burning lust inside me.

Same exactly feelings n situation here, also in NE Pa, Good to know I’m not alone…