Ode to Deborah

[Madame Pandora]

Okay...new rule...

If you're going to respond to this thread, your response must be in iambic pentameter, limeric form, or to the tune of something we can fucking hum.

If you're going to be anal or annoying, at least be creative about it

Obviously my response isn't in iambic, so...umm...starting now.

For the record, Kerrie isn't anal - she's brillant. Not her fault she has more class than the people who don't get her humor.

MP

 

[Flagg]

Kerrie is a she?!

 

[Madame Pandora]

Breaking my own rule...

Obviously she's a woman

If she were a man, I'd have to ask her to marry me.

MP

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

DCL, I'm disappointed.You of all people I expected to"get" it.

Well der-huuh, der-huh, guess you was too clever fer me. Now I understands ya. I takes it all back. Fuuuuuuuuuny.

 

[Guest]

I know the aabba meter of the limeric. Personally I prefer the Swedish meter better, you know, abba.

My work is done
Gone with the sun
But I may be back
To put Deb on the rack
If she doesn't be nice
I may do this thing twice.

Limericks? Limericks? We don't need no steenking limericks!!

Final blow before I go.

There once was a poster O'Keefe
Said since Brian Boru was our chief
A limerick must play
In one certain way
Or with me you'll have a big beef.

There once was a poster named Lee
Who foolishness usually could see
He had an off day
Let one get away
But why did it have to be me?

There once was a poster Pandora
Who took on a vengeful aura
Deb is my friend
Because her I defend
I'll be busy today and tomorrow

There once was a poster named Deb
Who at times was a bit of a reb
On her tail I did yank
Her butt I did spank
Her hindquarters are now a bright red

Limericks, you want limericks? I'll give you limericks!!

There once was a girl from Shoreditch
Who could be somewhat of a bitch
She angered a mob
So her they did rob
She ran home not wearing a stitch.

<faces reader><bows><disappears in cloud of smoke><only thing left is ethereal voice chanting>

There once was a madam named Laurel
Underneath was exceedingly moral
She was a good host
Let everyone post
At times it seemed to her sorrow....................

 

[Tabby432]

No comparison

There once was a writer named Kerrie O'Keefe
Who found she'd created a great deal of grief
By noting correctly that limericks have form
And asking all poets to stick to the norm
And pay more attention to rhyme schemes and such
(This simple request, though, was not welcomed much).
"If," said this Kerrie, "you're writing away
And your rhymes are two As and two Bs and an A,
The reader thinks 'Goody, a limerick is coming!'
Though he'll soon change his tune and be totally bumming
If the meter is too long and jumpy and screwy
(Like getting lunch meat when you want ratatouille).
Now the point," said this Kerrie, "I'm trying to make
Is to give all your readers a reasonable shake.
Do your own thing and write verse that is free
And let it be judged on its own quality
And I'll add at the risk of plain making you mad,
Half-hearted limericks just strike me as bad."
[/B]

Now I see what had everyone upset. It may have been funny but compared to this it sucked.

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Whodunnit: It's a snooze, sweetie. I don't care to get it because it's so, ya know, dull. Insult me, critique me, but never BORE me.

Kerrie kicks prose butt.

 

[Madame Pandora]

I am not friends with Deb.

I am actually in litigation with her at the moment.

She called me names and told everyone my real name, and gave out an erotic pic of me that she promised to keep just between us girls.

Laurel is named in the suit.

MP

 

[Guest]

Ther once was a poster Pandora
Who lost her vengeful aura
Deb isn't my friend
Her I'd never defend
So I'm free for today and tomorrow

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZgets a drink ofwaterZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ..................

 

[Madame Pandora]

Heh heh heh…apologies to Ogden

I think the general consensus is…

Whodunnit can muck it
But Kerrie can parry

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Here's one an old girldfriend taught me. When you say "Da-da" think "yadda-yadda"

Da-da, Da-da, Da-da,
Da-da, Da-da, Da-da,
Da-da, Da-da,
Da-da, Da-da,
Da-daa, Da-da, Da-Suck.

 

[Whispersecret]

<applauds Kerrie>

Girlfriend, you rock. Makes me proud to call you bitch. WOOF.

 

[Persephone]

Seriously?

I am not friends with Deb.

I am actually in litigation with her at the moment.

She called me names and told everyone my real name, and gave out an erotic pic of me that she promised to keep just between us girls.

Laurel is named in the suit.

MP

Hi MP, is this really true? Whoa!

 

[Madame Pandora]

Re: Seriously?

Hi MP, is this really true? Whoa!

Oh sweetheart. Work with me here.

MP

 

[Laurel]

Laurel is named in the suit.

I hate suits. I'm a jeans & tank tops kinda girl.

 

[BrainyBeauty]

Y'AABBA D'AABBA doo doo

I love to converse limerick style
To make words rhyme is worthwhile
But after watching this farce
I have a pain in my arse
And now I can't shit for to smile

Whodunnit is playing at fools
and lacks the appropriate tools
No sense of mathematical timing
And atrocious and poorly formed rhyming
While Kerrie O'Keefe truly rules!

I admit that mine aren't much better
Like a corny, grade school love letter
But they usually contain praise
With each turn of phrase
Instead of being a 'bed-wetter'

The rest of us poor slobs try our best
And we oftentimes fail the test
But we give it our best shot
We shit or get off the pot
We don't beat a dead horse, we let it rest.