Not really anything sexual here

[BadLilGirl420]

I have a problem. I slept with a guy that I thought would be just for sex, and welllllll, turns out that isn't all. He deliberatly led me on to believe that it was more for him too, and then told me, crudely and rudely that I was "Just a fuck" I had dated this guy before, for a long time. I unintentionally hurt him. I believe he wants to hurt me back. Is there anyway I can hurt him the way he hurt me? I know this is childish, but I am very angry and in a lot of pain

 

[jarhead001]

Sounds like a definte problem. Not sure that the very justified revenge you seek will help any. If anything, it may further hurt the situation. Best thing would be to forget it and move on (easier said than done, I know).

 

[jblue]

revenge

I would have to agree with just trying to move on without the revenge. I had an ex that broke up with after a 2 year very close relationship who decided to call me a week later just to tell me she fucked the guy who had been the shoulder she evidently was crying on during our relationship. It's been 3 1\2 years since then and I still want to slit here throat sometimes but the pain does subside for the most part with time. You just end up figuring out that you're better off without that kinda of emotionally abusive relationship. Time does heal but that doesn't mean you won't have a scar. Good luck and I hope you feel better soon. Jeff

 

[Tracker]

Problem

Badlilgirl,

I have a question that I just can't seem to figure out. You make it sound like all you were looking for from this relationship was sex, but then you're mad that he only wanted sex from you. Then you say you unintentually hurt him and think he's just trying to hurt you back, but now you want to do something more to hurt him back for hurting you. I'm I reading this right? It's just contradiction after contradiction. I'm more than willing to help you, but I need to understand the problem completely. Hope I can be of assistance to you.

 

[BadLilGirl420]

It is confusing, well let's see.... At first I thought all I wanted was sex. and it turned out that I wanted more. I just didn't realize that I still cared about him. Before we slept together, we hung out alot and just talked, I asked him exactly what he wanted from me, and he replied that it didn't matter what he wanted, since I thought we never could have a relationship. Which I took to mean that he wanted more than just sex. Not to mention, he always held my hands and put his arms around me, etc. etc.

As for the hurting thing, we had dated for a year on and off a long time ago, and I hurt him when I broke up with him, but I never meant to. He is making it appear that he is trying to hurt me. He knows exactly what hurts me, as we have been close friends and more for almost 4 years. I want to hurt him, or something, just get him back for treating me like shit. He made me feel like a whore, when he said that "all I was and would be to him is a great fuck", exact quote. When I replied that he meant the same to me, he got this hurt look on his face. So I am lost, hurt, angry, and confused.

 

[Skibum]

This is probably the last thing you want to hear, but you need to grow up. If you treat people like that, they will respond in kind. He was only treating you the same way you treated him. Stop trying to "get back at him" and get some distance. It sounds like you have both hurt each other enough already. Just drop it and move on before someone really gets hurt.

 

[BadLilGirl420]

The thing is I never treated him badly, until he treated me like shit. I only hurt him by ending our relationship because it wasn't working out and we both knew it, he just didn't want to realize it. I know it is childish, but right now I do not care

 

[Wizard]

Yep, Let it go move on with your life.....................................................

 

[BadLilGirl420]

I'm trying, I just wish he would quit lying to me.

 

[Tracker]

Understand completely

Badlilgirl,

Ok, now I understand your situation a little bit better than before. Thanks for the clarification. =) I can also understand the other responses you have received. I too recently got used in the same fashion by my ex. We were together for 3 years, engaged and then she broke up with me. Determined to make things work, because I loved her, I agree to starting over. To my surprise, she just wanted sex from me to satisfy her own desires. She told me this as she was packing up her things to move 3 hours away. I was mad and hurt and prepared to do anything possible to get my revenge. To my surprise, the best revenge was to completely ignore her and move on. It wasn't the meanest thing I could do, you'll just have to believe me on that! =), but it definitely did the trick. The other thing that you could do, is just go out with someone else and make sure he knows it. Just beware of this method, you tend to get hurt! If ya want to know anything more, feel free to E-mail me Tracker798@aol.com Hope I've helped!!

~Tracker

 

[Ambrosious]

The anger you are carrying is a cancer that YOU have to deal with. He isn't concerned with the fact that you are mad, in fact he seems pleased by it. Excise your cancer by becoming happy. I mean it. If you can't do it for real, at least pretend around him. Once he sees that you aren't hung up on him and his vile deeds, the revenge has happened.

 

[MinkSoul]

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

Meaning, don't exact it in the heat of anger. Think about it first, you know him better then anyone here. If you wait a bit an opportunity will most likely present itself. If you Really want to hurt him you will have to ignore your conscion ( I don't know if that's spelled right, it's the thing that tells you right from wrong). The best kind of revenge is when the little worm doesn't know who nailed him .....but you do

But remember, this is how wars get started.