Nice guys finish last

[Xander]

okay, so I cant remember if this has been done before. so sorry if it has.

Anyway, how many times have you heard that phrase (guys)??

And what is it that makes it true??

See, I KNOW for a fact that there are a lot of 'nice" guys out there.
And at the same time always hearing from the girls, "but there are no nice guys", "My bf is such and asshole" or "Why cant I meet a nice guy??"

Well Duh!! They're all around. But no one takes notice of us.

Ever noticed the nice girls never finish last??

It has always made me wonder. That phrase.....

I dont know about the rest of you guys, but it seems the "nice" guy is almost always the one who has to provide the support after the bastards has done their magic.

it's a bitch......

Okay I'm rambling...I'm done...just ignore me.

 

[Mischka]

Xander, I think the wimpy, unassertive wallflower guys are calling themselves nice and whining that they finish last because they want to blame others for their shortcomings. I myself have only dated truly wonderful and nice guys, and now I am married to the most wonderful and nicest one I ever met. So the "real" nice guys do, in fact, finish first.

 

[nitengale]

finishing last

I always thought this was a sexual reference...meaning NICE guys finished last.

 

[Mischka]

nitengale

Ooh! I like that explanation better!

 

[Weevil]

See, I KNOW for a fact that there are a lot of 'nice" guys out there.
And at the same time always hearing from the girls, "but there are no nice guys", "My bf is such and asshole" or "Why cant I meet a nice guy??"

You see most Girls like to think that they are less superficial than Men. So what they are really saying when they ask "Why can't I find a nice guy?" they are, in fact, asking "Why can't a find a tall, handsome, beautiful bodied, gainfully employed man who can knock my socks off in bed and treat me well?"

Nice guys are a dime a dozen. Most sensible women choose nice guys who have other nice attriubutes and give up on the "perfect guy".

Thank jeebus I conned a beautiful girl into thinking I was the best possible option.

 

[nitengale]

Re: nitengale

Ooh! I like that explanation better!

Let's hope Xander does

 

[Weevil]

Oh I should also mention that when Leo Durocher coined the term it was essentially meant as a jab to managers who wouldn't cheat to win.

The term is supposed to imply that honesty gets you nowhere.

 

[Outlaw]

Nice guys, huh?

Hey Xander,

Nice guys, as best I understand it, are guys that are non-threatening. Most of my female friends hang out with a couple of these, usually either gay guys or just nice, innocent men.
It kinda relates to the phrase "Treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen." I don't know the psychological reason for it, but I suppose that if a man is too nice, he is seen to be forgiving and understanding, even in defeat. There's no desire to change him, which is something that many women look for. They (in my experience) want to be able to break the bad boy habits of a new boyfriend, and mold him. Nice guys are already molded, so there's no challenge.
Despite that, the best defence is to act nice enough to attract the reputation of a nice guy, then reveal the devilish underside and blow them away.
If a woman will discriminate on whether you're too nice or not, screw 'em. THey'll either love a man for what he is, or keep looking.
It's a dud phrase; bad english and open to varied interpretation.
(or maybe it just means, if you're a considerate man, you won't come before she's finished!)

 

[CoolCucumber]

Well Xander. I believe that some nice guys really do finish last, but not all of them. See, unfortunately, alot of nice guys are pretty plain. Women don't always like plain. They need the excitement that a nice guy doesn't always supply. There are however some nice guys who are exciting, and they do quite well. However, I have seen that alot of women don't want to date the nice guys because, well, they're too damn afraid of losing that friendship to take the risk. Their loss. It also seems to work against the shy guy thing. Women say the like shy guys, but, the shy guy is just TOO SHY to do anything to get her attention, so, he gets left in the cold.
-CoolCucumber

 

[SweetNick]

Hmm, Xander, you forgot to include the lines, "Why can't he be like you?" or the closely related, "Why can't I find a guy like you?" Those are my favorites.

Mishka, I'm not sure all nice guys are wallflowres, but I know I'm slowly becoming one because of those two lines above and the most famous, "You're a really great guy, but can't we just keep it as friends?"

 

[MysteryJKR]

No one has ever stated that phrase when speaking of me.

I think im somewhat of a nice guy, and caring. But I get so crapped on and have been for so long and it just stinks. Not with women alone, but life in general.
I always do try and make a diff with people around me and yea im a dork in here and no one knows me but I do alot on my own time, at least I think so and I still get kicked in the neck on a regular basis. *shrugs* oh well.

sio

 

[Mischka]

[W]hen they ask "Why can't I find a nice guy?" they are, in fact, asking "Why can't a find a tall, handsome, beautiful bodied, gainfully employed man who can knock my socks off in bed and treat me well?"

Yup, that's how I defined "nice."

 

[Willing and Unsure]

If there are supposedly all these nice guys that no one takes notice to, why am I still sitting here playing with my computer instead of out with one of them?

 

[Xander]

Hmm, Xander, you forgot to include the lines, "Why can't he be like you?" or the closely related, "Why can't I find a guy like you?" Those are my favorites.

Mishka, I'm not sure all nice guys are wallflowres, but I know I'm slowly becoming one because of those two lines above and the most famous, "You're a really great guy, but can't we just keep it as friends?"

Oh do I EVER know these phrases!! and I know they're all said in the best meaning. But damn sometimes hearing them just hurts dont it?

And Mishka. If you're definition of a nice guy, is a Whimpy wall flower...Uhm i dare to beg the differ. But hey that's just a personal opinion.

 

[Mischka]

Mishka, I'm not sure all nice guys are wallflowers...

My point exactly. The wallflowers are the faux nice guys that are really just trying to find a way to blame others for not getting what they want. Real nice guys don't blend with the wallpaper, and are sincerely generous and caring individuals. Xander, does this clear things up?

And SweetNick, don't take the "let's be friends" thing too harshly. Sometimes it really means just that, and other times it means that you two just weren't meant for each other in a romantic way.

[Edited by Mischka on 04-17-2001 at 08:51 PM]

 

[CoolCucumber]

If there are supposedly all these nice guys that no one takes notice to, why am I still sitting here playing with my computer instead of out with one of them?

Well, because you probably already have, and just don't realize it. It's the ones that are right in front of your eyes that are the hardest to see.
-CoolCucumber

 

[SweetNick]

Oh do I EVER know these phrases!! and I know they're all said in the best meaning. But damn sometimes hearing them just hurts dont it?

Hurts like a BITCH, especially when the next day she looks at you and says, "Don't you know, you're not suppose to like your friends?" Oh right, I suppose I'm suppose to find someone I detest??? Sighhh ~shakes head and wanders off thinking off all my friends~

[Edited by SweetNick on 04-17-2001 at 08:56 PM]

 

[Mischka]

SweetNick, it sounds like you hit a string of female "friends" that don't know what they want. But chin up, I promise there are bona fide nice girls out there as well.

 

[Willing and Unsure]

CoolCucumber

So they're right in front of me, after they said they arent interested.... that makes a lot of sense

 

[CoolCucumber]

You know what? While reading and writing on this thread, I think I may have just had an epithany. MAYBE, the women are the ones who create some of this mess in the first place? I mean, usually, they are the ones who push the friendships to the breaking point, and then act surprised when feelings develop. I'm not saying that all women are doing that, but, I think it happens enough. Like, they want a crutch or something? I don't know, maybe I'm off base just a bit, but it's happened here a few times, sooooo
-CoolCucumber

 

[Angel]

I think it goes both ways, CC.

 

[CoolCucumber]

I think it goes both ways, CC.

I know it goes both ways. But I think that the guys, and girls who do it need to pay a little more attention.
-CoolCucumber

 

[Silverlily]

Ever noticed the nice girls never finish last??

Nice girls don't finish at all, they don't do that sort of thing.


I think sometimes nice gets mixed up with passive. I've dated quite a few nice guys over the years. Passive ones, however, failed to capture my attention.

 

[Xander]

Ever noticed the nice girls never finish last??

Nice girls don't finish at all, they don't do that sort of thing.


I think sometimes nice gets mixed up with passive. I've dated quite a few nice guys over the years. Passive ones, however, failed to capture my attention.

All true. It does get mixed up with passive from time to time.
However not all the time.

The door swings both ways.

 

[Weevil]

I think a lot of people are missing the definition of nice. As all of you ladies know there are guys who treat women poorly. Often these women lament the fact that these guys seem to be jerks. They often inquire about the lack of "nice" guys. The fact is guys who will treat women like princesses are all around. Its just that women date guys that they are attracted to and guys who meet the traditional definition of "good looking" can often afford to be jerks. The real problem is that nobody is looking for someone who is "nice".