Long journey in our marriage. Written a lot about it here on Lit.
Started with repression, sex once every 2-3 weeks 25+ years ago. Me jacking off to porn, phone sex, cam girls and strippers. Then renewed focus on her and better sex but still long periods of drought. Thankfully, she cums like crazy when we do have sex but it's me doing all the work. She's a taker and I'm a giver, big picture. And she has misplaced priorities with her work, school, church.
Then it was me recently admitting (with zero guilt and some pride) my porn coping habits due to her historic lack of interest and creativity. Lots of deep and good discussions. We had some forays into sex toys, sex stores, massage (all part of my plan) and finally this church wife happily watches me jacking off to what she used to think was "evil" porn, enjoying herself and cumming afterwards while I fuck her and confessed my porn habits. That was revolutionary. I revealed some of this other side of her husband. We had alot of fun. I splurge during vacations, spend alot on her and she's secure in our relationship, knows I love her, so it was fun during the day with friends on vacation and our private, dirty lust at night.
But then more of the same. Family drama with kids. Misplaced priorities. So I'm writing a final confession to her (she loves it when I write) and I'm not holding back. I'm telling her I want to incorporate erotica, porn and three way sex fantasies into our regular lovemaking. Ever since our Vegas massage she wants an erotic massage when making love. I dutifully and happily comply. But now I want something. Listening to sex audios, watching scenes together, graphically admitting what I've done and fantasies about her getting pleasure from another man while I watch. I want to dive into that with her.
I'm about two weeks away from the reveal. It won't be a complete shock because I've been leading to this but the explicit invitation and discussion of her getting fucked by another man (fantasy) while I masturbate
is going to shake her up a bit. But it needs to be done. I love her and it's time for all the secrets to be made public.
Life is not lived without some risk.
Started with repression, sex once every 2-3 weeks 25+ years ago. Me jacking off to porn, phone sex, cam girls and strippers. Then renewed focus on her and better sex but still long periods of drought. Thankfully, she cums like crazy when we do have sex but it's me doing all the work. She's a taker and I'm a giver, big picture. And she has misplaced priorities with her work, school, church.
Then it was me recently admitting (with zero guilt and some pride) my porn coping habits due to her historic lack of interest and creativity. Lots of deep and good discussions. We had some forays into sex toys, sex stores, massage (all part of my plan) and finally this church wife happily watches me jacking off to what she used to think was "evil" porn, enjoying herself and cumming afterwards while I fuck her and confessed my porn habits. That was revolutionary. I revealed some of this other side of her husband. We had alot of fun. I splurge during vacations, spend alot on her and she's secure in our relationship, knows I love her, so it was fun during the day with friends on vacation and our private, dirty lust at night.
But then more of the same. Family drama with kids. Misplaced priorities. So I'm writing a final confession to her (she loves it when I write) and I'm not holding back. I'm telling her I want to incorporate erotica, porn and three way sex fantasies into our regular lovemaking. Ever since our Vegas massage she wants an erotic massage when making love. I dutifully and happily comply. But now I want something. Listening to sex audios, watching scenes together, graphically admitting what I've done and fantasies about her getting pleasure from another man while I watch. I want to dive into that with her.
I'm about two weeks away from the reveal. It won't be a complete shock because I've been leading to this but the explicit invitation and discussion of her getting fucked by another man (fantasy) while I masturbate
is going to shake her up a bit. But it needs to be done. I love her and it's time for all the secrets to be made public.
Life is not lived without some risk.
