New writer looking for feedback

[ravenmx]

I hope I am in the right area now for this.

I just had a story accepted and would like feedback on it (I hope I am doing this correct as a thread).

I have never written before but love to daydream. I thought I would try my hand at writing and was encouraged by friends to submit.

I submited to a couple sites and was rejected, but one site forwarded me to Literotica.

Any way I am looking for good and bad feedback on my story. I am in the process of writing another and would like all kinds of feedback to improve my writing skills.

Thank you in advance to everyone that gives feedback.


My story

http://www.literotica.com/stories/s...y.php?id=166525

 

[ravenmx]

Sorry I forgot to add the needed information

The Title is Linda's Dream
The writer is Ravenmx
The story is in the Lesbian sex

 

[HornyHenry]

Your link doesn't work

Looks like it was copied from another place, not the original web page. That causes the middle to be truncated.
It should be this one:
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=166525
obtw, I saw it had an "H"
Congratulations. Hope you get good feedback too. Welcome to Lit.