New to online relationships

[Lilli_Marlene]

Hi there - I'm a moderately-experienced submissive who's recently gotten involved in an online D/s relationship and it's all new to me, and quite exciting, though a bit confusing.

My new Master has a devilish imagination and is quite good at what he does - which is to turn me (emotionally) into whatever he likes. He comes up with the most wicked ideas of things for me to do, and orders me to do them in secret but with very, very tiny telling clues that someone MIGHT get the slightest hint about, if they were observant and kinky enough to make the connection.

Whenever he gives me orders or instruction, I get the biggest thrill and want to drop everything to comply. However, as this is an online-only relationship and I have a "normal" life to protect, I'm am forced to delay my obedience. I'm sure this does not overly please him, but at the same time there is no way to comply sooner.

Have do other submissives in online relationships handle this type of situation?

- Lilli

 

[CutieMouse]

I wouldn't be terribly patient with someone who couldn't comprehend/adapt to/understand that real life comes first. Period.

It seems as if you are assuming he'd be unhappy that you didn't instantly comply, and Real Life got in the way... have you asked him if that is the case?

 

[catalina_francisco]

Have to say during my days of online experience, I pretty much did what was ordered in the moment unless given permission to do it at a later time. Part of it was because I wanted a RL D/s relationship and so figured I was not playing games and was better getting used to the inconvenience of orders when it didn't entirely suit than to expect to choose when I carried them out. I also don't think putting off would have been tolerated except in the very most extreme circumstances. It was good training for when I entered a RL relationship and was expected to put his needs ahead of mine.

Catalina

 

[4square]

may I ask

Hi Lilli,

I am entering this realm, may I ask what your online D has asked you to do so far? I am intrigued.

 

[Etoile]

Whenever he gives me orders or instruction, I get the biggest thrill and want to drop everything to comply. However, as this is an online-only relationship and I have a "normal" life to protect, I'm am forced to delay my obedience. I'm sure this does not overly please him, but at the same time there is no way to comply sooner.

I think the answer lies in what your "normal" life is. I would say it is related to who depends on you, and who knows about this online-only relationship. If you are married and your spouse knows about your master, then he/she is an adult and can wait sometimes. If he/she doesn't know about your master and you don't want it known, then saying "uh...can't...busy now" all the time might arouse suspicion. If you have kids who need you for food, health care, counseling, etc. then I would devote the attention to the kids - that's the commitment one makes when one has children. If you have teenagers who can take care of themselves, let 'em make their own sandwich or whatever! It also depends how much your master knows about your "normal" life - does he know you have one? Does he know who is involved in it? I agree with CutieMouse, if he knows you've got someone depending on you and he says "you must do this now anyway" I would be skeptical of how much respect he has for you.

Perhaps a solution would be to ask his advice rather than ours? Tell him you're unhappy feeling torn at times and ask him what he thinks is important. He can probably give you the best guidance since he knows your situation.

 

[FurryFury]

I wouldn't be terribly patient with someone who couldn't comprehend/adapt to/understand that real life comes first. Period.

It seems as if you are assuming he'd be unhappy that you didn't instantly comply, and Real Life got in the way... have you asked him if that is the case?

Great post!