New to Lit

[Eloquent_Hedonist]

Hello everyone, thanks for taking a look at my thread.

I've been lurking here for about a month now but I've decided, given the state of things, that now would be a great time to actually get off my metaphorical arse and jump in!

I'm a man in my mid twenties and based in the UK. I identify as a submissive, in particular for mature female dominants. That being said I have dabbled in a range of different roles and am open to trying new things.

The purpose of this post is largely to start a general dialogue. I would love to hear from some of the more seasoned Lit members as to general advice for navigating the community. Particularly for someone who is interested in finding an online partner.
Almost all of my experience up until now has been in person (although I have sent my fair share of sexts ;P) so any thoughts and advice is most welcome.

I've seen a range of personals seeking female dominants, with varying degrees of effectiveness, so I might as well throw my hat into the ring now as well:

Currently I am looking for a mature female dominant for some stimulating conversation, with the potential for further entanglement if we have good chemistry. If you are interested in knowing more send me a message and I'd be more than happy to satiate your curiosity.

If you've got this far thanks again for your time. Looking forward to finally ending my lurking career.

E.H.

 

[Master_Doctor]

Hello everyone, thanks for taking a look at my thread.

I've been lurking here for about a month now but I've decided, given the state of things, that now would be a great time to actually get off my metaphorical arse and jump in!

I'm a man in my mid twenties and based in the UK. I identify as a submissive, in particular for mature female dominants. That being said I have dabbled in a range of different roles and am open to trying new things.

The purpose of this post is largely to start a general dialogue. I would love to hear from some of the more seasoned Lit members as to general advice for navigating the community. Particularly for someone who is interested in finding an online partner.
Almost all of my experience up until now has been in person (although I have sent my fair share of sexts ;P) so any thoughts and advice is most welcome.

I've seen a range of personals seeking female dominants, with varying degrees of effectiveness, so I might as well throw my hat into the ring now as well:

Currently I am looking for a mature female dominant for some stimulating conversation, with the potential for further entanglement if we have good chemistry. If you are interested in knowing more send me a message and I'd be more than happy to satiate your curiosity.

If you've got this far thanks again for your time. Looking forward to finally ending my lurking career.

E.H.

Welcome. I have to give you credit. Much love for your nick!

 

[Eloquent_Hedonist]

Thanks Master Doctor! To be honest I was a little concerned that it was a little too pretentious.

Plus h0tyungsubslut6969 was taken

 

[Eloquent_Hedonist]

A Bump and a bit...

If you're reading this, hope you are doing well (as well as everyone not reading this of course).

So I decided to bump this thread, however just typing 'bump' and a pithy witticism seemed a little redundant, so I've decided to make this bump more productive.

Since I am quite new to the kink community I always wonder about how my preferences stack up against other Lit users, so I've decided to post discussion topics in the hopes of getting some interesting opinions and perspectives.

Everyone's welcome to comment, and if you like this kind of conversation feel free to shoot me a PM.

The first bump-debate is... titles! Basically any term one uses to refer to their dominant/sub (e.g. Mr/Miss, Ma'am/Sir, Master/Mistress, Pet/Bitch/Slut/Boy/Girl etc). I'm interested what people use and why, from both ends of the flogger.

Looking forward to seeing what people have to say.

Hope you enjoy the rest of your day,
EH

 

[phil1955]

My wife and I are older. 65 and 62 and have just started exploring these topics. I have been playing the Dom role though she may be more Dom than I am. At this point we have given up trying to figure out what we are and are just playing to have some fun. For her, sir, master, daddy etc. does not work so she calls me captain as many years ago, I was an actual boat captain.

 

[Eloquent_Hedonist]

Thanks for sharing Phil!

That's quite interesting, I think it's a nice touch that it's related to your background personally. Does anything else take on a naval theme?

 

[ReaperW]

.....

 

[Eloquent_Hedonist]

Thank you for sharing as well Reaper!

Of course paying lip service is insufficient on it's own, it needs to be backed up with action!

It seems to me that the importance of titles is inversely related to the closeness of the relationship, with those who enjoy tangential or casual engagements utilising it as a simple stepping of point for establishing dominance. In a more mentally and emotionally invested relationship this control becomes inherent and the need for titles is lessened.

 

[Eloquent_Hedonist]

Hello to everyone who is taking the time to read this thread.

As I mentioned last week I am looking to augment my periodic bumps with a thought or topic I have had in mind, to see what other people think and to stimulate some good conversation.

This topic is something I've been thinking about since I saw some pieces from an erotic photographer on Fetlife (unfortunately I misplaced their handle but will add it to the thread when I find it again). I am curious as to what people think about the concept of affirmative domination. For those who aren't aware (which included me until recently) affirmative domination is a D/s dynamic with an emphasis on pride and affirmation of the sub rather than degradation or humiliation (this is not to denounce these elements as viable kinks of course). The dynamic is characterised by dominants wanting to cultivate and better their subs in the act of serving them, whilst also showing off their submissive to other dominants/submissives. The subs role is largely unchanged, but includes elements of wanting to be showed off/positively reflect their dominant.

What do people think about this dynamic, both as a consistent paradigm or sprinkled into their D/s interactions. I would love to hear from both dominants and submissives about this topic. As always all perspectives are welcome.

If you would like to discuss this topic or the any of the previous content of this thread PMs are always welcome.

Thank you for taking the time to read this, hope you have a great day!

EH

 

[Master_Doctor]

Hello to everyone who is taking the time to read this thread.

As I mentioned last week I am looking to augment my periodic bumps with a thought or topic I have had in mind, to see what other people think and to stimulate some good conversation.

This topic is something I've been thinking about since I saw some pieces from an erotic photographer on Fetlife (unfortunately I misplaced their handle but will add it to the thread when I find it again). I am curious as to what people think about the concept of affirmative domination. For those who aren't aware (which included me until recently) affirmative domination is a D/s dynamic with an emphasis on pride and affirmation of the sub rather than degradation or humiliation (this is not to denounce these elements as viable kinks of course). The dynamic is characterised by dominants wanting to cultivate and better their subs in the act of serving them, whilst also showing off their submissive to other dominants/submissives. The subs role is largely unchanged, but includes elements of wanting to be showed off/positively reflect their dominant.

What do people think about this dynamic, both as a consistent paradigm or sprinkled into their D/s interactions. I would love to hear from both dominants and submissives about this topic. As always all perspectives are welcome.

If you would like to discuss this topic or the any of the previous content of this thread PMs are always welcome.

Thank you for taking the time to read this, hope you have a great day!

EH

I absolutely want to respond to this thread. But I think that it would be more appropriate to do so in the BDSM section. I mean, seriously, I wouldnt want to scare away people who have little to no interest in BDSM by talking about this in the introduction to lit section.

Master Doctor

 

[Eloquent_Hedonist]

I absolutely want to respond to this thread. But I think that it would be more appropriate to do so in the BDSM section. I mean, seriously, I wouldnt want to scare away people who have little to no interest in BDSM by talking about this in the introduction to lit section.

Master Doctor

Thanks for the advice Master Doctor! Although I thought this thread was in the BDSM personals section.

Have I made a rather catastrophic blunder!?

EH

 

[Master_Doctor]

Thanks for the advice Master Doctor! Although I thought this thread was in the BDSM personals section.

Have I made a rather catastrophic blunder!?

EH

Seriously doubtful. I just thought the subject was worthy of its own thread. I think it will get more attention and reads that way. I hope you do not mind.

 

[Eloquent_Hedonist]

Well as long as it starts a good conversation