Hi, I have had a new poem accepted by Literotica...here is the link: http://literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=47633
I hope it pleases you. Thanks, Amy.
I hope it pleases you. Thanks, Amy.
New Poem
- Thread starter amyfirst
- Start date
The Huntsman
Experienced
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- 58
hmmm
Is that really a poem?
Seems nasty for nasty's sake.
Please, convince me otherwise.
The Huntsman
Is that really a poem?
Seems nasty for nasty's sake.
Please, convince me otherwise.
The Huntsman
Honey Dipped
Virgin
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- Jan 8, 2002
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- 20
.
Last edited:
daughter
Dreamer
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- Oct 22, 2001
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- 1,561
Cake or Pie
If what you do pleases you, cool. We are however in a forum where we ask for feedback from our peers. Some want feedback on how to improve. To that end, praise is nice, but it ain't gonna get the job done.
Furthermore, why blow sunshine up someone's butt, if what the poet really wants is honest, constructive feedback? What happens when the poet post b-rated porn on another poetry board and gets slammed? The poet is taken by surprise, possibly comes away with hurt feelings and a beat up ego cause the nice folks at Literotica told her that her sexy romp was great.
Better off flirting and bullshitting in chat or personal, but not on a writers/poets forum. I find it dissrespectful and a disservice. Can't we be polite and constructive?
I know I'm dry, but I'd rather be dry than lie.
Amy what do you want to accomplish with your writing? Do you want to write prose or poetry? One is cake and the other is pie. If you'd like to know the difference ask.
From what I've read, you like cake. So do I, but I don't bake cakes and then offer them as pies. So which is it?
Peace,
daughter
If what you do pleases you, cool. We are however in a forum where we ask for feedback from our peers. Some want feedback on how to improve. To that end, praise is nice, but it ain't gonna get the job done.
Furthermore, why blow sunshine up someone's butt, if what the poet really wants is honest, constructive feedback? What happens when the poet post b-rated porn on another poetry board and gets slammed? The poet is taken by surprise, possibly comes away with hurt feelings and a beat up ego cause the nice folks at Literotica told her that her sexy romp was great.
Better off flirting and bullshitting in chat or personal, but not on a writers/poets forum. I find it dissrespectful and a disservice. Can't we be polite and constructive?
I know I'm dry, but I'd rather be dry than lie.
Amy what do you want to accomplish with your writing? Do you want to write prose or poetry? One is cake and the other is pie. If you'd like to know the difference ask.
From what I've read, you like cake. So do I, but I don't bake cakes and then offer them as pies. So which is it?
Peace,
daughter
WickedEve
save an apple, eat eve
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2001
- Posts
- 11,470
daughter, I like what you said
I think it's exhausting trying not to step on all the new, (and some old) wiggling toes around here. Like Judo, I do try to be positive and encouraging, but at the same time I want to level with some of the poets. I can understand some people wanting to submit a poem for fun. But when they come to this board and ask for feedback, I think they need to be told more than "do what you do," or "if it makes you happy do it," and etc...
So many new poets ask us to "be gentle." I have no problem being gentle, but I think some of them want us to be gentle to the point of avoiding the truth.
I was lucky to start here when Up and you were regulars. I took some hard knocks with some ego slapping critiques, but I sure as hell don't write the way I once did.
"My panties cling to my cunt
Wetness flows between my lips
Dark hairs curl with moisture
Drop of pussy dew drips"
As for Amy, she hasn't been given much decent feedback on this poem. A few problems with it have been mentioned. I know a poet needs more. She needs specific things pointed out, and possible solutions on how to improve her writing. And of course she needs encouragement. And praise when she shows improvement. All of us that are here seeking feedback need that. I know I do.
I think it's exhausting trying not to step on all the new, (and some old) wiggling toes around here. Like Judo, I do try to be positive and encouraging, but at the same time I want to level with some of the poets. I can understand some people wanting to submit a poem for fun. But when they come to this board and ask for feedback, I think they need to be told more than "do what you do," or "if it makes you happy do it," and etc...
So many new poets ask us to "be gentle." I have no problem being gentle, but I think some of them want us to be gentle to the point of avoiding the truth.
I was lucky to start here when Up and you were regulars. I took some hard knocks with some ego slapping critiques, but I sure as hell don't write the way I once did.
"My panties cling to my cunt
Wetness flows between my lips
Dark hairs curl with moisture
Drop of pussy dew drips"
As for Amy, she hasn't been given much decent feedback on this poem. A few problems with it have been mentioned. I know a poet needs more. She needs specific things pointed out, and possible solutions on how to improve her writing. And of course she needs encouragement. And praise when she shows improvement. All of us that are here seeking feedback need that. I know I do.
daughter
Dreamer
- Joined
- Oct 22, 2001
- Posts
- 1,561
We think alike
WE--
First, I'd like to know what Amy wants. You all know my style and some like you know personally that I'm geniuenly interested in helping. But, giving advice when it isn't asked for usually just gets you a lot of defensive outcrys.
Telling someone how great she is without any specifics is as helpful as saying you suck. They're equal in my book. You don't have to be technical either, but do give the writer something to build on or strengthen. Tell a poet you like the tone, style, rhythm and why. Something as simple as "I like the how the poem made me laugh. Good word choices." This is positive, specific and helpful.
If folks simply want pats on the back we get that from our friends, family and lovers. We're your peers and down the road, maybe your friends. With my friends, I tell 'em when they're dress is up. That's what a real friend does.
Peace,
daughter
p.s. WE, you came here with talent and you had the gumption to improve your skills. I always liked what you said, it was how you were saying it that irked me sometimes. Of course, I also liked your confidence. If you didn't know, you learned when to heed advice and when to reject it. I like what you do.
WE--
First, I'd like to know what Amy wants. You all know my style and some like you know personally that I'm geniuenly interested in helping. But, giving advice when it isn't asked for usually just gets you a lot of defensive outcrys.
Telling someone how great she is without any specifics is as helpful as saying you suck. They're equal in my book. You don't have to be technical either, but do give the writer something to build on or strengthen. Tell a poet you like the tone, style, rhythm and why. Something as simple as "I like the how the poem made me laugh. Good word choices." This is positive, specific and helpful.
If folks simply want pats on the back we get that from our friends, family and lovers. We're your peers and down the road, maybe your friends. With my friends, I tell 'em when they're dress is up. That's what a real friend does.
Peace,
daughter
p.s. WE, you came here with talent and you had the gumption to improve your skills. I always liked what you said, it was how you were saying it that irked me sometimes. Of course, I also liked your confidence. If you didn't know, you learned when to heed advice and when to reject it. I like what you do.
dark stranger
Virgin
- Joined
- May 14, 2002
- Posts
- 24
the subtle of eros
hi amy, your view of this dance was seductive...very bold and hard fingered...I enjoyed the honest animal of your love here..
my suggestion would be to make packages of the scenes...to try to give the image with subtle views..make her and you modest yet exposed in the view...
like side view glances of the eros instead of the upskirt??
the most sensual lover is one that keeps some mystery..and you are showing us you /her as lovers....arouse us and seduce us with what you keep hidden from us?
you have the images ...now how to dress them for dinner, thank you for the moment to read my humble opininons
regards Dark
hi amy, your view of this dance was seductive...very bold and hard fingered...I enjoyed the honest animal of your love here..
my suggestion would be to make packages of the scenes...to try to give the image with subtle views..make her and you modest yet exposed in the view...
like side view glances of the eros instead of the upskirt??
the most sensual lover is one that keeps some mystery..and you are showing us you /her as lovers....arouse us and seduce us with what you keep hidden from us?
you have the images ...now how to dress them for dinner, thank you for the moment to read my humble opininons
regards Dark
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