New poem for you to -read-

[Halx]

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=33727

It's there if you'd like to read it.

 

[WickedEve]

New poem for you to -read-

I -read- the poem. Since you made a point that your poem is there to -read- does that mean you don't want any feedback posted here?

 

[Jazzy2]

read it

What 5 sentences spread over 14 lines. Hey, punctuation ain't the enemy. And you're killin' me with the fragments.

What's up with the ranger? Where did he go? You introduced him then mysteriously he disappears?

Too bad you don't revise cause contented this ain't.

jazzy2

 

[Guest]

I read it too. It's okay.

I don't like this part:
dares not
cares not

You're reading along at a leisurely pace and suddenly those lines make you SPEED UP way too much! Then you repeat them in the second stanza.

Like I said, the poems okay.