New master

[purplecadillac1]

i have been recently introduced to the BDSM life style and love it. I am now going to try and be a male master to a male sub what are some good things i can do to humiliate this guy he has toys

 

[twysted73]

i have been recently introduced to the BDSM life style and love it. I am now going to try and be a male master to a male sub what are some good things i can do to humiliate this guy he has toys

I would suggest reading up on it some more.
Haste really does often make waste in this lifestyle.

 

[greeneyed_Lady]

I would suggest reading up on it some more.
Haste really does often make waste in this lifestyle.

Not only that, but your new subbie might not like that kind of play. Not everyone enjoys humiliation. Sitting down and having a conversation with him about what he wants, what his expectations are, what's offlimits is the best place to start. Once you've established those things you can begin to explore them and expand on them.

I don't do humiliation because I don't like the idea of it. Now.. that's not to say I don't use names or find things that my subbie finds difficult (one didn't like the idea of *gender bending* and for him the idea of me having him wear frilly fem panties really did a number on his head)... but I don't consider those things humiliation.

 

[catalina_francisco]

I suggest reading lots more, and even more so, communicating with your proposed partner in this. I am always at a loss as to why people wishing to Top, Dominate, or interact with another turn to a bunch of anonymous strangers who know neither person for advice as to what to do and introduce in play. As a pyl myself, and also one who has been placed in the position of topping others, the first thing I do is establish some form of positive communication which includes a lot of talking about expectations, needs, desires, experience/s (if any), and acceptable limits as well as getting to know the other person and get a feel for their personality etc. From there it flows easily into what will and will not take place. It also goes a long way toward establishing trust between those involved and encouraging new ideas and directions the play might take. If I am in the place of pyl and found the PYL had to ask others for ideas, I would be making a quick exit based on a serious question of trust, safety and ability.

Catalina

 

[VelvetDarkness]

Google for a BDSM checklist, they're mainly geared for hetero couples but don't take much adapting.

The stories in the BDSM section here are great reading and there are more than a few gay ones. Fantasy should always be taken with a large pinch of salt though.

Get him to do the work for you by having him write down his fantasies. If he has impact toys (paddles/whips etc) it's a good idea to ask him to explain his tolerance to them before you let rip. Some people are painwhores (like me) and others just enjoy light play.

Think about what you want him to do. This should be as much about you getting your kicks as it is about him getting his.

A safeword such as 'red' that stops what you're doing if it gets too much is a good idea. It also allows him to say 'no' and mean 'yes' without you getting confused about what he's consenting to. Be aware that if he is bound he should be able to speak and if his mouth is gagged or in use, he should be free to make a signal that tells you he needs you to stop.

Don't try to run before you can walk but be confident with the easier stuff and the dynamic will develop between you naturally.

Have fun

 

[catalina_francisco]

Another good point to remember is to not be tied into making a plan and sticking to it perfectly. Sometimes the unexpected changes plans, sometimes it helps it develop in other directions. Spontaneity is so under-rated and over looked by some.

Catalina

 

[licker4450]

Like already was uttered, read as much as you can. Try to learn from the experiences of others. And always remember Rule #1: safety first.

 

[Fauna]

ditto

Like many have said above, read, research and get a BDSM checklist from your new sub. Find out his level of experience and know what turns the two of you on. You'll find your style.

best of luck!