New here, want to get to know people

Redwarden

Experienced
Joined
Nov 21, 2013
Posts
84
Hi all, I'm new to the forums, but I've enjoyed the stories off literotica for years. I'm a 23 year old security guard, been in security for nearly 5 years. I've thought about writing a few stories on here, mostly because I used to write for friends who found themselves bored. I'm posting here to pretty much say hi to everyone, and welcome any messages or posts. Thanks :)
 
Hi all, I'm new to the forums, but I've enjoyed the stories off literotica for years. I'm a 23 year old security guard, been in security for nearly 5 years. I've thought about writing a few stories on here, mostly because I used to write for friends who found themselves bored. I'm posting here to pretty much say hi to everyone, and welcome any messages or posts. Thanks :)

Welcome to the boards. I'm sure you will enjoy yourself here.
 
Yes, welcome to Lit! Have fun and make good choices...(in who you trust) ;)

There are good people here and you will be inundated with PMs! Hopefully you'll be able to spot the good ones. :rose:
 
You might....

....want to say whether you are a man or woman in your post, and/or in your profile...
 
WELCOME TO LITEROTICA!

My name's TheMalevolence, but you can call me... erm... TheMalevolence. I frequent the Authors Hangout, Story ideas and BDSM boards. Random tips, go!

1) Don't post on the GB (General Board) unless that's the only place it fits. Most of the posters are elitist assholes.

2) Post whatever the hell you want in The Playground, it's mostly word games.

3) You need to make 100 posts (replies or threads) to be able to use an Avatar. Nobody really respects you until you do so its bes tomstat spamming up the word games.

4) If you ever post a story, make sure it's in the right category or people will tear you a new one. If a sex scene features the word "no" it belongs in NonCon. If there's any Incest, it goes in incest. If it contains a decent amount of anal sex, it goes in Anal. If you want your story to get flamed and enjoy low ratings, it goes in Loving Wives. So on and so forth.

5) Don't talk to Hypoxia, he's our resident Tentacle Rapist.

6) Don't mention rape while near Lovecraft, nobody knows why but he can't stand it for "personal reasons"

7) Never, EVER post a picture which involves pussies and cacti.

8) And lastly, don't talk about sybians. The can be DARK.

The las one was a bit of a running joke about 6 people here will actually get. Anyway, enjoy your time here, I hope to see you around!
 
Thanks all for the replies and the warm welcome, I really appreciate it. And to clear it up (I know, I should have had the foresight :) ) I'm a 23 year old male security guard. With this welcome, I can't wait to talk to people on here :)
 
Thanks all for the replies and the warm welcome, I really appreciate it. And to clear it up (I know, I should have had the foresight :) ) I'm a 23 year old male security guard. With this welcome, I can't wait to talk to people on here :)

Crap, on that note - you're on your own and don't be a psycho. :eek:

Teasing.

And WTF!!! No one told me I shouldn't post on the GB and that's where I started! Of course, I eventually founded the safety of the Playground, but sometimes I stare longingly into the distance of the GB...those weird, meaningful conversations about things other than what I ate and who I would kiss and shower with. Sigh.....
 
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Haha, I picked that up Ms. Librarian :p. And who you should kiss in the shower with? I'm already getting more possible material for future stories. Look out literotica!!!!
 
Haha, I picked that up Ms. Librarian :p. And who you should kiss in the shower with? I'm already getting more possible material for future stories. Look out literotica!!!!

I don't need to post who I would kiss in the shower - they know ;)

Welcome to Lit, Mr. Warden :cool:
 
Thanks Fermina, I'm enjoying it already. Now I'm curious though........*looks around* where's the shower? ��
 
Haha, I picked that up Ms. Librarian :p. And who you should kiss and shower with? I'm already getting more possible material for future stories. Look out literotica!!!!

Ooh! That remind me. If you go into the Story Ideas forum, go to the bottom of the page and change the "Show posts from" option to "The Beginning". This will give you 365 pages of story ideas to feast your eyes upon. Only a very small handful of them are good, but the others sure are entertaining!
 
Thanks for the welcome Moon :). And Malevolence, I'm sure before too long you'll be seeing a few of my ideas there, I've got a rather......inventive imagination :)
 
Thanks for the welcome Moon :). And Malevolence, I'm sure before too long you'll be seeing a few of my ideas there, I've got a rather......inventive imagination :)

Dood, I once posted an idea on that forum about women being brainwashed by the CIA into making the machine embedded in their cell rape them with metal tentacles via telepathy using magical brainwashing horniness gas.

I wish you luck challenging my immortal throne!
 
I bow to the immortal *bows*. But I shall challenge you for that throne in the future, mwahahaha!!!!
 
Bring it on, Warden. Bring. It. On.

But seriously though, you seem like my kind of guy, look forward to scheming with you in the future :D
 
Dood, I once posted an idea on that forum about women being brainwashed by the CIA into making the machine embedded in their cell rape them with metal tentacles via telepathy using magical brainwashing horniness gas.

So this is where my taxes go to? I suppose that there are worse ways to spend money, as long as the results are positive.
 
Yes Moon, we should be very worried, it seems the CIA has some serious control issues.....and some really twisted employees ��. I guess working in the office can make the mind wander!
 
WELCOME TO LITEROTICA!

My name's TheMalevolence, but you can call me... erm... TheMalevolence. I frequent the Authors Hangout, Story ideas and BDSM boards. Random tips, go!

1) Don't post on the GB (General Board) unless that's the only place it fits. Most of the posters are elitist assholes.

2) Post whatever the hell you want in The Playground, it's mostly word games.

3) You need to make 100 posts (replies or threads) to be able to use an Avatar. Nobody really respects you until you do so its bes tomstat spamming up the word games.

4) If you ever post a story, make sure it's in the right category or people will tear you a new one. If a sex scene features the word "no" it belongs in NonCon. If there's any Incest, it goes in incest. If it contains a decent amount of anal sex, it goes in Anal. If you want your story to get flamed and enjoy low ratings, it goes in Loving Wives. So on and so forth.

5) Don't talk to Hypoxia, he's our resident Tentacle Rapist.

6) Don't mention rape while near Lovecraft, nobody knows why but he can't stand it for "personal reasons"

7) Never, EVER post a picture which involves pussies and cacti.

8) And lastly, don't talk about sybians. The can be DARK.

The las one was a bit of a running joke about 6 people here will actually get. Anyway, enjoy your time here, I hope to see you around!
that seems pretty legit for someone as new as you.


welcome to you both
 
Welcome. I'm new as well, and just settling in like you are.

Learning quickly, I hope.

I hope you enjoy your stay and your PMs!
 
Thanks Ashes and Terranim, it's nice to be welcomed by you guys. Feel free to message me if you'd like. I'm happy to have a chat :)
 
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