New episode of me and Roxann after a year: feedback?

[Monkeys_paw]

Hi everyone,
After a year I have written a second episode of a story about me and Roxann on a weekend city trip:
http://www.literotica.com/s/roxann-prepares
It tells the story how it all began, and is a combination story of first-time and solo sex.

For my first story, I received insightful feedback and I have tried to incorporate that in this story: give the characters a bit more background, less details and try to hool the reader as soon as possible.

Would you please read my story and let me know if I succeded and anything else you could offer. Any tips, advice are all very welcome!

Thank you in advance for your time.

MP

 

[Monkeys_paw]

Anyone?

 

[sr71plt]

Not me, no. I'm not going to invest time in anything that goes a year between episodes.