Nelson Mandela is NOT dead

[3113]

I know you're all relieved.

Bush causes confusion with Mandela quip

Former president Nelson Mandela is alive and well after comments on Iraq by US President George Bush appear to have been misunderstood, the Nelson Mandela Foundation said on Friday.

"It appears that his statement has been misunderstood and we wish to assure everyone that Mr Mandela is alive and well and enjoying some rest and relaxation at his home in Johannesburg," said Achmat Dangor, chief executive of the foundation.

On Thursday Bush was quoted by Agence France Presse as saying: "I heard somebody say, 'Now where's Mandela?' Well, Mandela is dead. Because Saddam Hussein killed all the Mandelas."

The comments came during a media briefing.

 

[neonlyte]

Someone shoot him now... not Mandela... the other one.

 

[Liar]

If this is not satire, I may have to start early on my Absinthe.

 

[lilblackwench]

Reminds me of the America's Next Top Model in which one of the girls claimed to feel connected to Mandela...but had no idea whether he was even still alive or not.

 

[3113]

If this is not satire, I may have to start early on my Absinthe.

You can see it for yourself (alas), he says it quite seriously and emphatically

"Mandela is DEAD!"

I'll get the glasses. Got enough of that stuff to share all around?

 

[cantdog]

Maybe Mandela will be like Elvis?

Baking powder?

Saddam killed all the Mandelas? What the fuck is that supposed to mean? The motherfucker gets more Orwell by the day.

 

[john-the-author]

We can take heart: I think the little weasel is so dumb, he'll forget to breathe eventually and that'll be that.

Kee-RIST, what a moron! George W. Bush is definitely the load his mother should've swallowed.

 

[cloudy]

Reminds me of the America's Next Top Model in which one of the girls claimed to feel connected to Mandela...but had no idea whether he was even still alive or not.

I remember that one.

Yes, someone please shoot Bush now, or at the very least, stuff a ball gag in his mouth.

 

[impressive]

Kee-RIST, what a moron! George W. Bush is definitely the load his mother should've swallowed.

*water spew*

 

[3113]

stuff a ball gag in his mouth.

I'd say that was kinky but...ew! I so don't want to go there.

 

[rgraham666]

*blink* *blink*

I want the job as stress counselor for his Secret Service agents. The impulse to pull out their weapon and use it on the person they are supposed to protect must be overwhelming at times.

 

[rengadeirishman]

i heard it on the Daily Show, i actually did spew my coffee onto my chest.

fucker made me burn myself

 

[flavortang]

People, people. Mandela MUST be dead. Our president said he was, and he's the decider on who lives and who dies.

 

[3113]

People, people. Mandela MUST be dead. Our president said he was, and he's the decider on who lives and who dies.

It's even more insidious than that! Apparently, Saddam killed him!

Do you think South Africa knows this?

 

[neonlyte]

It's even more insidious than that! Apparently, Saddam killed him!

Do you think South Africa knows this?

We should get Saddam first...




... didn't we do that once?

 

[3113]

... didn't we do that once?

I think this was supposed to have happened before we overthrew Saddam...which means Mandela's been dead for a least four years! And we're just hearing about it now? [shakes head] Americans are so out of touch....

 

[neonlyte]

I think this was supposed to have happened before we overthrew Saddam...which means Mandela's been dead for a least four years! And we're just hearing about it now? [shakes head] Americans are so out of touch....

So who was the imposter at the unveiling of the Mandela statue in London last month? Don't tell me that was Dick Cheney 'blacked up'?

 

[cantdog]

Look! The signpost up ahead!

Without our being aware of it, somehow we moved into the twilight zone.

I can so clearly visualize Cheney in burnt-cork quacking his little speech at the unveiling.

 

[flavortang]

It's even more insidious than that! Apparently, Saddam killed him!

Do you think South Africa knows this?

Apparently, Mandela was a secret member of Al Qaida before he was killed. He was a freedom hater. He hated freedom.

 

[3113]

Apparently, Mandela was a secret member of Al Qaida before he was killed. He was a freedom hater. He hated freedom.

But...that would make his killing by Saddam "good." Bush made it sound bad.

 

[DerelictionOfSanity]

But...that would make his killing by Saddam "good." Bush made it sound bad.

Never question the doublespeak. We shouldn't trouble our tiny little minds about whether Nelson Mandela is dead, alive, good or evil! We must rise up in arms against evil terror, wherever it may be and flock to support Bush, the one true hero of freedom and democracy!

Have I gone a little bit overboard with my sarcasm here?

Seriously, I think there needs to be a category of nonsense beyond bullshit for the things that come out of Bush's mouth. Maybe Bush-shit.

 

[jomar]

i heard it on the Daily Show, i actually did spew my coffee onto my chest.

fucker made me burn myself

I just saw it on the Daily Show as well. Bush is certainly more fun when he goes off script.

 

[flavortang]

You know, it wouldn't surprise me if, one day, Bush came out and said "I'm a strong advocate of animal rights. I've given birth to several litters of puppies, so I know how it feels to be wet, cold and without shelter. Because I'm the decider." None of that would surprise me. Or if he one day confessed that he rented out a small townhouse that was located next to his liver for some extra income.

 

[impressive]

i heard it on the Daily Show, i actually did spew my coffee onto my chest.

fucker made me burn myself

Jon Stewart makes everything funnier ...

http://www.comedycentral.com/mother...t/index.jhtml&ml_playlist=&lnk=&is_large=true

 

[3113]

So who was the imposter at the unveiling of the Mandela statue in London last month? Don't tell me that was Dick Cheney 'blacked up'?

Where's Throbbs? I've decided we need a cartoon of this