Negative Stigma

[MrMannson]

Remind her how much you love her. How important she is in your life.
Talk about your curiosity. Do you think it's just a fleeting idea. Maybe watching some porn, together, would give you clarity
If it's something you really want to try, offer to let her be part.
I tought my ex how to give blow jobs. We had a few 3somes with another guy. We set strict boundaries and had fun.

If you want to pursue this privately, get her opinion. Maybe she wanted to experiment too. Let her. Be fair and reasonable.

This is your confusion but never make her think she isn't part of it. Most of all, remember, sex is supposed to be fun. If you aren't having fun, you are the problem. Be the solution

Keep me posted. Ask more questions.
Secrecy ruined my marriage and my relationship with my daughter.

Do better than me.

I really appreciate your insight.

I know I’ll have to just bite the bullet and say something to her, to talk about it.

I guess part of my apprehension is the years of “joking” about gay or bisexual men, and how feminine some are. I know it’s not funny at all, and I’m probably the least feminine hairy masculine male out there. That’s probably why I’m so scared to really have that talk. And, she’s been hurt before (before me), so I’m also a little worried about hurting her, though the alternative scares me as much.

This is just me venting, and it sounds like feeble excuses as I re read it. I’m going to do it, and talk to her and tell her.

 

[MrMannson]

Don't be surprised at what you might find out. I've had four girlfriends that liked to finger while giving head. My last said she would rock my world if i would listen. She had me shaved, rinsed and ready and used two fingers while giving oral. I felt like superman. she loved to use a plug about the size of a walnut during intercourse as she said it kept men harder. It's like there's a playbook out there for this. She already knows you like it so try a plug and she may love it. We play in a swingers group, all of us are professionals and we keep it low key and the group has changed members over the 35 years. If you work hard, it's a great stress relief.

Amazing solution, and sounds very exciting!

I’m a little uncertain though, as my wife is open minded to a point in bed, I’ve never managed to get her to the point of actually introducing another male in our bedroom. And she would never, ever entertain another woman with us, but that’s a topic for another thread.

Thanks for your insight, it’s appreciated!

 

[MrMannson]

Our minds and the fantasies that emerge, sometimes even during sex with a partner are … I believe just tools to enhance the experience of the intimacy. Sometimes while cowgirling Him , I’ll imagine another cock touching my lips

That’s so true though! It might be too much information, but last night I was face down between her legs, licking her like no other. My ass was up in the air, and I was using my imagination that I was being rimmed and then penetrated by a man who just cramped my wife. After she had one, I rolled over and she noticed that I had one too all over the bed. I didn’t tell her what I was thinking, but it sure was good.

 

[Chilllax]

There is a growing awareness and acceptance that sexuality is not binary. We all fall somewhere between fully heterosexual and fully homosexual. It’s who you are… So just accept it. I wouldn’t worry about putting a label on it. It is what it is. As for telling your wife… Well, How good is your relationship? Ideally… You should be able to share who you are with your partner. But understand it could be quite disorienting to her to find out long after she has married you that you have desires to be with men. Which… To be frank… it seems you do. This is totally normal but also likely to be quite surprising to your wife. Or who knows, maybe not. She might have suspicions.

The bigger question is, what do you plan to do about it? Are you telling your wife that you can’t have a happy and fulfilled sex life without occasionally being with men? Yeah,… That’s apt to be a tough Convo. But if you’re just admitting to desiring men, but are committed to remaining monogamous with her…Well, then you’ve given her an avenue to try things in bed that may scratch the itch I.e., occasionally dress like a man, wear a strap-on dildo and letting you perform fellatio on it, be fucked with it, etc.

My only quibble with your post is your suggestion that enjoying something up the butt necessarily means somebody has gay tendencies. It doesn’t. It means they like the feeling of something up their butt. And that’s all it means.

The only thing I would add is you know your wife best. If you don't think talking it bringing this up is going to fly, don't. The reaction could vary a great deal and you don't want to get hurt.