Need help with a .DAT file please

[burrish]

Hello all, I am sure some of you might remember me. If so you know that a while back I found out that my husband and best friend had slept together. Well I don't think he is sleeping with anyone right now but that he is cybering to other girls on line. We have talked and that is a no-no with me so he should no better or just not care about my feeling, one or the other doesn't matter to me anymore, I just want to find out and kick his ass to the curb. But first I have a small problem, he has his msn and yahoo messages saved under a .DAT file and I am not computer literit which he knows so I don't know how to open them. I think he leaves them there for me to find and get pissed about and does whatever so that I can't know everything he says, either way I am bound and determind to do it, so is there anyone out there that can help me.
Thanks,
Heather

 

[warrior queen]

there's a little gizmo you can get called a 'keystroke recorder' that goes onto the keyboard cable where it joins the back of the computer. it's very unobtrusive, and if he doesn't know about it, he won't look for it!
it records every single keystroke, which means you can go back and get all passwords - in short, it means you have access to every single thing he does on the computer!

they retail here for under $100 australian.

 

[burrish]

I forgot to add that he has several messaging systems or rather several log ins for yahoo and msn but don't know his passwords is there a way I can find those out as well.
Thanks,
Heather

 

[cuz cracker]

http://www.ionutils.co.uk/nettel_header.htm





often we look forward to opening a door we wish we had not.

 

[burrish]

cuz cracker I know what you mean, I felt that way the first time I learned he had cheated on me, and he swore he would never do it again. But I think he has and I told him if he ever did it again I would be gone without so much as a good-bye or a look back. I think that time has come but I need to know for sure before I jump the gun. Don't get me wrong I love the man with all my heart but at the same time I am tired of being someone's fool.
Heather

 

[JRaven]

If you can see the file listed...

you can read the contents. The files aren't encrypted, but they do have a bunch of other data in them. Hold the left SHIFT key down and Right Click the .DAT file. The menu that comes up will include an option to "Open With..." Select that option. If you get another list of options (depending on version of Windows), select NotePad. Otherwise, click on "Choose Program..." Scroll down the list that appears and pick NotePad.

Depending on the size of the file, you may not be able to open it with NotePad. "Write" and "WordPad" are also good choices.

Also, you can open "MyDocuments" and in there will be a folder for each of his Yahoo accounts. You can browse them and see what files (Pictures) he has sent or recieved.

Hope this helps.

Jenny

 

[burrish]

JRavem I have done this many of times. They are not there this time. He knows that I know how to go and do that so I am thinking he has found another way to hide them so to speak, cause I found them I just don't know how to open them. All the wordpad, notepad and stuff in that menu doesn't work. Cuz Cracker I went and downloaded that site you sent me and I can't get that to work I don't know how to check the path that I am using. And warrior queen I couldn't do that cause he is constantly messing with his computer, opening it up cleaning the inside and all that stuff. He knows a lot about computers and if I hooked anything up to it he would know in a heart beat. But thanks.
Any other ideas? I am open to all suggestions, also does anyone know how to do a search for his passwords. I know his admin for yahoo. But when I went in so it could send me the password it just said change password and I don't want that.
Thanks all,
Heather

 

[Willing and Unsure]

I dont really remember you or your past experiences, but from what you're saying, is this really worth it? if you dont trust him, then what is really there for your relationship with him? If he's getting some pleasure out of hiding things from you, do you really know him that well? There's no telling what he could be hiding.

If it were me, it wouldnt matter how much I loved him, if I couldnt trust that he be honest with me (especially if he'd cheated before) then there's nothing that could keep me there. I'd always be wondering, always trying to check up on him. There's so much more to life than that. And I'm sure that there is someone else out there that wouldnt be treating you the same way.

edited to add....
I'm not trying to be overly negative or saying you should leave him. I'm just wondering really.

 

[fgarvb1]

There is always a way.
Have you thought of requesting his password to those programs?

Then get them from the email before he gets home and delete the email. it might work

Record the evidence in case you need it.

However consider this. If you don't trust him what difference does it make?

If you can't live with the past you already have the moral and biblical right to divorce him.

I personally consider divorce a last resort. Nobody wins in a divorce.

Been there, Done that.

 

[burrish]

I know what you mean for divorce. I don't want to do that unless it is for sure because there are two kids involved. I did ask him if he had any email accounts that i didn't know about and he said if he did then he doesn't use them anymore. no offense to the guys here but i have always said trust noone, not male or female, if given the opertuantiy and sercustance anyone can be had. i THINK for me that if it got to that point where i was thinking about it or whatever i would talk to him about it first before i did anything stupid, but that is me and not anyone else. I think that the only person in the world i trust more than anything is my mother.
I also believe that if you love someone with all your heart like i do him than you should try everything in your power to make it work before giving up. and that is what i am trying to do. i think that i am at my wits end and a lot of times feel it is one sided, but i feel that for my sake the love i have for him and for my children that i have to try. thankfully my kids are still to young to know what is going on, so that it won't affect them and hopefully by the time they are old enough then one of two things will have happened, one we worked things out or two we will no longer be together.
ok anyway i think i have rambled enough, if i haven't made my point than i am sorry and will try to do better next time,
again, thank you all for your help
heather

 

[Aaron Dazer]

Deal with the issue not the details. You know what's happening. don't sweat the small stuff.

You could go to a friend’s computer and/or a library computer and POSE as a unknown women. Say you ran into his profile and like it. get someone here at lit to donate a few Pictures so you can send him. Then BLOW It all up in his face when you get the goods.

 

[H0wl]

I dont really remember you or your past experiences, but from what you're saying, is this really worth it? if you dont trust him, then what is really there for your relationship with him? If he's getting some pleasure out of hiding things from you, do you really know him that well? There's no telling what he could be hiding.

If it were me, it wouldnt matter how much I loved him, if I couldnt trust that he be honest with me (especially if he'd cheated before) then there's nothing that could keep me there. I'd always be wondering, always trying to check up on him. There's so much more to life than that. And I'm sure that there is someone else out there that wouldnt be treating you the same way.

edited to add....
I'm not trying to be overly negative or saying you should leave him. I'm just wondering really.

Yep yep.

I remember reading this thread last night and thinking pretty much the same thing. I also have to say that I'm not real comfortable with the idea of helping crack ANYONE elses passwords.

I think you'd be better off taking a while to think about what you would do if you DID find evidence that he was cheating on you again.

Would you leave him? Make him go to counseling? What are your options if he's cheating and how far would you be willing to go? I understand not wanting divorce since there are kids involved. If you confront him with evidence of his cheating will anything change?

Also there is the faint possibility that he's NOT cheating. From what you've posted, you've snooped his email before. I know that I would definitely go to greater lengths to keep someone out of my email if they'd gone through it once already even if I DIDNT have something to hide.

Is this really the way you want to live your life?