Naughty Kitty

[Etoile]

Okay, this might sound kind of strange. I was getting ready for some morning masturbation (with the Hitachi Magic Wand), and I had my legs open on the bed looking for porn online. The vibrator was in my crotch, but it wasn't turned on. One of my cats came over and decided to make herself comfy in the V of my legs. Now she is purring...

Yup.

Well, okay, it's not that strong, and I'm not quite that twisted. But she is in the right spot.

 

[dolf]

lmao!

 

[lorddragonwolf]

kitty found the kitty.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

kitty found the kitty.

Be grateful your (feline) kitty isn't as perverted as one I used to have. She was an inveterate genital-licker. She didn't care whose - her own, another animal's, mine, my (then-)wife's... It's strange to wake up in the morning to feel a tongue rasping across sensitive skin, reach down to encourage it - and instead of finding wife's luxuriant hair, find short hair and pointy ears! Lemme tell ya, that will wake you up quick!

 

[graceanne]

Be grateful your (feline) kitty isn't as perverted as one I used to have. She was an inveterate genital-licker. She didn't care whose - her own, another animal's, mine, my (then-)wife's... It's strange to wake up in the morning to feel a tongue rasping across sensitive skin, reach down to encourage it - and instead of finding wife's luxuriant hair, find short hair and pointy ears! Lemme tell ya, that will wake you up quick!

OMG LMAO

 

[Etoile]

Oh my god, Sir Winston! That's amazing. Did you ever try to train her out of it? What was your response when you figured it out - jump away?

 

[dolf]

Oh my god, Sir Winston! That's amazing. Did you ever try to train her out of it? What was your response when you figured it out - jump away?

train her out of it? after all the effort made training her into it!
xx

 

[Sir_Winston54]

Oh my god, Sir Winston! That's amazing. Did you ever try to train her out of it? What was your response when you figured it out - jump away?

The first time, I backhanded her halfway across the room - strictly a reflexive action. After that, the few other times it happened to me, I'd just pick her up by the scruff of the neck and "drop" her out the door of the bedroom. (Of course, the bedroom door was fifteen feet away.) She'd get her feelings hurt and stay away from me for the rest of the day.

My wife, on the other hand, freaked out the first time - screeched loud enough to wake the dead, which barely roused me - and reflexively snapped her thighs shut. Serious error. She was millimeters from needing stitches. Cats don't like having someone try to choke them to death. After three or four times each, she finally seemed to get the idea we didn't want her to do it, and confined her attentions to herself and the other cats (one male, one female). They didn't seem to mind at all.

 

[graceanne]

The first time, I backhanded her halfway across the room - strictly a reflexive action. After that, the few other times it happened to me, I'd just pick her up by the scruff of the neck and "drop" her out the door of the bedroom. (Of course, the bedroom door was fifteen feet away.) She'd get her feelings hurt and stay away from me for the rest of the day.

My wife, on the other hand, freaked out the first time - screeched loud enough to wake the dead, which barely roused me - and reflexively snapped her thighs shut. Serious error. She was millimeters from needing stitches. Cats don't like having someone try to choke them to death. After three or four times each, she finally seemed to get the idea we didn't want her to do it, and confined her attentions to herself and the other cats (one male, one female). They didn't seem to mind at all.

OMG *gasp* STOP IT! YOU'RE GIVING ME AN ASTHMA ATTACK!

 

[rosco rathbone]

You 0'ed from a cat?????!!!


jesus mary & joseph

 

[Sir_Winston54]

You 0'ed from a cat?????!!!

jesus mary & joseph

Read the posts again, Rosco-san. No mention of O's, penile or vaginal - just the "attentions" that woke us.

Sometimes it's hard to tell if Maestro Rathbone is tweakin' or freakin' ... keeping my fingers crossed that it's the former. And then again, he might have been referring to Etoile's original post.

 

[rosco rathbone]

Read the posts again, Rosco-san. No mention of O's, penile or vaginal - just the "attentions" that woke us.

Sometimes it's hard to tell if Maestro Rathbone is tweakin' or freakin' ... keeping my fingers crossed that it's the former. And then again, he might have been referring to Etoile's original post.

Pervert.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

Pervert.

Thank you, sir. And here I was thinking you hadn't noticed.

 

[rosco rathbone]

Thank you, sir. And here I was thinking you hadn't noticed.

We're all pervs here together, so let's raise our glasses and sing the old perving song.



I never fucked a cat though. Fuck's sake man,what is wrong with you? COUld you not keep it in the species at least?

 

[Etoile]

FTR, I did mention that kitty's purring wasn't NEARLY strong enough...

 

[Sir_Winston54]

FTR, I did mention that kitty's purring wasn't NEARLY strong enough...

Hmmmm... "wasn't nearly strong enough," or "nearly wasn't strong enough" -- there is a difference....

 

[sirhugs]

lucky the kitty didn't get electrocuted!

 

[Quint]

Used to get in a similar problem. Back in the good ol' days, I'd have to keep a blankie over myself in case a nosy relative happened by my room. Well, my cat would notice a certain energetic motion under the sheets, go "ooh, something's moving under there!" and pounce.

 

[Vixandra]

Quint- OUCH

I can barely get my cat to sit still long enough to be petted... though I imagine I'd send her flying if she tried licking me there.

Hubby's cat, before she died, loved to run across or lay on top of us while we were getting busy.
Quite annoying.

 

[kitty4ever]

<falls over giggling> OMG!

 

[sirhugs]

<falls over giggling> OMG!

*spanks the naughty kitty before lifting her up*

 

[CherryPop22]

I think this is a very good thread. Wish I had some stories to share. All my pups do is eat,sleep, and go potty

 

[FungiUg]

I did have a cat that liked to stand on my shoulder during the event... we started locking the door, and he had some sort of sex radar, because sure enough, he'd turn up at the door and wail to be let in.

Most inconvenient...