My wife, does she or doesn't she

[South Bend man]

Need some advice from the ladies please.

Married here for over 20 years, happy and we are still in very good shape.

My wife has never been one to enjoy frequency in sex, usually once every other week is good for her. Over the years I've tried to please her in all ways possible from bubble baths to sexy chat.

Just a little insight before my question though. She does not really like her breasts played with, and does not let me go down on her. She is death on anal play, but there in lies the riddle.

Me not being allowed to offer her oral is a sticking point. I had a girlfriend in college who barely let me come up for air. Sheer heaven!

Many years ago we introduced a small vibrator to our sex lives. Since than she only wants very quick sex with her using the vibrator on her clitty while I finger her G spot. It takes quite a while to bring her to orgasm unless I start to rub, circle, and finger her"pucker" with my other finger at the same time.

The result is explosive! After she is finished she usally says something along the line of...I wish you wouldn't put your finger there?????

So my question is this, is it explosive for all, and do you think she really likes it as much as it seems. If so, why the response.

Thanks for your help.

discreteguy50@hotmail.com

 

[DriveSouth]

She does...

 

[South Bend man]

Me too

I think so also, but I wish she would say or, or ask for it.

 

[Spokanite]

She likes it

My wife was the same way with anal play. She had an incredible orgasm every time I went down on her and played with her ass, but she wouldn't admit to liking it. For some reason she feelt like its wrong to play with the ass and it was gross even though she enjoyed it. She is starting to loosen up a little more after nine years of marriage and she even plays with my ass every now and again, which I really enjoy. My wife grew up with a very strict mother who told her that sex was bad and you should never touch yourself and she says that she has never masturbated until after we were married and I encouraged her to. She has just now gotten to the point where she can make herself cum because she was so uncomfortable with herself while doing it before. By talking openly with her about sex and assuring her that there was nothing wrong with wanting and enjoying sex we now have a great sex life. I only hope that it continues to improve as much as it has over the past ten years.

I don't know if any of this helps, but I hope it does.

 

[SexyChele]

Speaking as a woman

I love to have my ass played with, but if it happens to soon during oral it can be more of an irritant than a pleasure. But once a man gets it right (usually after the first time), yes, my orgasm is VERY "explosive"!

Most women are brought up believing that anal is "bad", "dirty", something "good" girls don't do. There is still a taboo about it, for some women. And even if a woman has her anus played with, and gets off with it, she may have some conflicting feelings about it. Sort of like a guy who might enjoy a woman fingering him, yet he still as issues that it is something only gay men do.

I would say, based on the info given here, that your wife is certainly enjoying what you are doing. The problem is to get her to realize that 1. you like to do it, and 2. it's okay for her to like it as well.

Have you ever asked her why she doesn't like you fingering her anus when she seems to have such a strong orgasm? She may not be able to answer that one, but you can possibly place a seed for her to think about. Maybe one day she will have answer for you.

Sorry, but that's about all I can offer now. I hope everything works out well for you and your wife.

 

[South Bend man]

Sexy and the others

Thanks for the reply.

I know she feels that it is dirty to finger her anal area. She will sometimes say, "thats dirty, don't go there".

As we continue though she will have a screaming, goose bump orgasm. She would prefer to pretend that it didn't happen though.

It's an odd thing to understand, kind of like when she offers to go down on me.

Who knows.

Thanks