So I've been RPing with another girl for about a year and a half. At first our RP was never intended to be sexual, but slowly our characters started to become more drawn to each other and finally she proposed that we let them be a couple. I agreed eagerly because secretly had hoped for the same. Eventually our characters started to do sexual things and finally we both went all out and let them have full-on graphic sex. At first it was exciting and stimulating. Just reading her replies got me wet. But now it's not the same. It's really lost the spark. We've done who knows how many sex scenes now and they just don't do it for me anymore, and it's depressing because that's one of the things I loved about our RP. Everything else in the RP is going okay, but the sex is just... dull. It's basically become the same sequence of events over and over again. Is there any way I can spice things up and keep it sexy?
My RP is becoming flat and predictable
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allamagione
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When you say everything else is going OK, do you mean that everything is going OK for the characters? If so, perhaps an injection of conflict would be called for? Someone gets jealous, insecure, wants to try something new but is scared to mention it, etc....
VenusButterflies
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It's funny, this happens in relationships in real life. I hate it when that happens, it gets harder for me to cum because I get bored. It's partially the reason why I need kink in my sex -- I need the added stimulation, the unpredictability, the mixed sensations, the overall excitement. I need something I feel I have to keep up with, not something that has to keep up with me.
Why not introduce something new? Something you haven't tried, but always wanted to? Do you just do vanilla sex scenes? Throw some BDSM into it. Do you always agree to have a sex scene when one of you wants it? Deny it. Don't let it happen. Throw another character into the mix. Or two. Or several.
So, what do your sex scenes involve?
allamagione
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God yes. That's the key, isn't it? Deny, deny, deny, and throw every obstacle at them you can. Eroticism is mostly in the wanting.
VenusButterflies
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Duplicate post. Deleted.
J
JAMESBJOHNSON
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Dolts. Uh yeah, when a relationship is based on sex or cooking or cards or gardening things get stale fast.
StrangeLife
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What you are experiencing is known in some circles as the Moonlighting effect, named after an old TV show featuring Bruce Willis and Cybil Shepherd, that went on a massive downhill slide after the two main charaters hooked up. It turned out that most of the substance was built on the erotic tension between the two protagonists, so when they took that part away there was nothing left.
I obviously dont know anything about your roleplaying, but what you need to do is add something interresting to it besides the sex. That's how a real life marriage works too, after the initial wild erotic tension has turned into everyday routine. You go out together, you build a home together, you fly on holidays together..... you find interresting stuff to do together outside the bedroom. If you're in WoW go questing or kill a dragon or something - don't let it all be about sex all the time.
And of course inside the bedroom you add toys, new techniques, more people maybe... whatever you feel like trying out. You can do the same things in rp and I bet they'll have the same effect.
It's actually not so much that the rest of the RP is losing spark, but that the sexy parts just aren't sexy anymore. Sorry I didn't make that totally clear. By "the rest of the RP is fine," I mean we still do all of the other stuff. We've got a plot going (actually we might have too many plots going) and there's conflict, drama, development. We have more than a few characters so that we don't focus on one thing all the time. It's just that, when characters do get intimate, it suddenly becomes this formulaic, predictable, "They kissed, she sucked, he moaned, she moaned, he thrust, she moaned, he cums, she cums, they cuddle" kind of thing. It used to be full of surprise and curiosity. And you could see that in the writing.
We've done a few kinky things. I mean, our first two main characters were identical twin boys, and, well... Let's just say I never thought I'd be into twincest. There have also been a few non-consensual scenes, and some orgasm denial. I really do like the idea of actually denying my RP partner, though, to build some anticipation. Maybe next time she tries to start something, I'll find an excuse to stop it.
We've done a few kinky things. I mean, our first two main characters were identical twin boys, and, well... Let's just say I never thought I'd be into twincest. There have also been a few non-consensual scenes, and some orgasm denial. I really do like the idea of actually denying my RP partner, though, to build some anticipation. Maybe next time she tries to start something, I'll find an excuse to stop it.
VenusButterflies
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