My Mama Told Me not to Cum

[nice90sguy]

...well, actually my wife told me to stop jacking off so often now I've reached a certain age as it will "deplete my Life Force". She believes in Chi, Karma, and astrology.

But is she scientifically right?

 

[Blaggs08]

I believe the opposite.
Drink water, jack off more
Gives more testosterone and makes you more energetic

 

[SimonDoom]

Nope.

The more expenditure, the more replenishment.

The essence you take is equal to the essence you make.

 

[nice90sguy]

I calculated that, having jacked off pretty reguarly for at least 50 years, I could have filled a bathtub with my jizz by now.

Alas, we never plan ahead when we're young, do we?

 

[nice90sguy]

I believe the opposite.
Drink water, jack off more
Gives more testosterone and makes you more energetic

I like to think that too. But I'm definitely slowing down the last few years

 

[djrip]

So... Edging endlessly without climax. For the purposes of the main event later, endurance training or putting a round in the chamber on a hair trigger?

 

[Blaggs08]

So... Edging endlessly without climax. For the purposes of the main event later, endurance training or putting a round in the chamber on a hair trigger?

Only problem I have there is if I edge so much - as soon as the tip feels a pussy clench on it - a fountain of cream explodes!!!

 

[djrip]

Only problem I have there is if I edge so much - as soon as the tip feels a pussy clench on it - a fountain of cream explodes!!!

Sounds like a vote for hair trigger... Maybe you need both, train for endurance, but then stop training and empty the magazine before game time.

 

[AwkwardlySet]

You have started four topics on the same day and I am here to warn you that only @EmilyMiller is allowed to do that.

I am keeping an eye on you, troublemaker...

 

[EmilyMiller]

You have started four topics on the same day and I am here to warn you that only @EmilyMiller is allowed to do that.

I am keeping an eye on you, troublemaker...

Maybe he is EmilyMiller, you never can tell.

Oh, and you don’t need to use the @ - just say “tentacle monster” three times and spin around.

 

[ElectricBlue]

...well, actually my wife told me to stop jacking off so often now I've reached a certain age as it will "deplete my Life Force". She believes in Chi, Karma, and astrology.

But is she scientifically right?

No. If you stop or slow down, you'll accelerate the slowing down to the point where you stop. Then you're fucked, when you're not (if you know what I mean). Keep filling the pipe, is my advice .

 

[AwkwardlySet]

Maybe he is EmilyMiller, you never can tell.

Nice try but nerdiness levels do not match.

 

[EmilyMiller]

Nice try but nerdiness levels do not match.

Perhaps I’m a good actress.

 

[AwkwardlySet]

Oh, and you don’t need to use the @ - just say “tentacle monster” three times and spin around.

Nah I am not invoking the T word!
I am still angry that you wrote a long story about some T stuff instead of writing about some juicy milfs, for example. I would even settle for some flirty alien milfs...

 

[EmilyMiller]

Nice try but nerdiness levels do not match.

Come to think of it, I see he posted a thread that linked to itself without mentioning Douglas Hofstadter, so you may have a point.

Em

 

[EmilyMiller]

Nah I am not invoking the T word!
I am still angry that you wrote a long story about some T stuff instead of writing about some juicy milfs, for example. I would even settle for some flirty alien milfs...

Jacobs Progress has two hot MILFs.

Em

 

[theWollstonecraftWoman]

...well, actually my wife told me to stop jacking off so often now I've reached a certain age as it will "deplete my Life Force". She believes in Chi, Karma, and astrology.

But is she scientifically right?

I'm not certain that Three Dog Night had this discussion in mind when they preformed the song.

 

[Fatdog25]

...well, actually my wife told me to stop jacking off so often now I've reached a certain age as it will "deplete my Life Force". She believes in Chi, Karma, and astrology.

But is she scientifically right?

I've heard it claimed that orgasm depletes testosterone levels, although I've never actually seen any studies that back this up. Usually, it's promoted as "semen retention" or "no fap", and claims to enhance vitality, attractiveness, and creativity as well as cure myriad sexual dysfunctions, usually after a period of time known as "flatlining" or "feeling like shit". Abstention from orgasm purportedly increases testosterone levels by some (IMO) fantastical percentage.

I don't know if it makes you live longer, but I'm sure it probably feels like it.

FWIW, I don't think karma and astrology have anything to do with it. I'm a firm believer in what goes around, comes around but I don't think the stars are involved, though.

I subscribe to the creed espoused by Jack Nicholson's character in the "The Bucket List":

1. Never pass a bathroom.
2. Never waste a hard on.
3. Never trust a fart.

This has yet to betray me...

 

[12oclocktales]

I was going to do some serious research on this subject, but am too busy jerking off right now. Maybe later.

 

[JohnSm123]

...well, actually my wife told me to stop jacking off so often now I've reached a certain age as it will "deplete my Life Force". She believes in Chi, Karma, and astrology.

But is she scientifically right?

Am I the only one who thought that was about mother/son incest?

 

[SimonDoom]

Maybe he is EmilyMiller, you never can tell.

Oh, and you don’t need to use the @ - just say “tentacle monster” three times and spin around.

Dorothy: "There's no place like home. Toto, where are you?"

Tentacle Monster: "Burp."

 

[nice90sguy]

You have started four topics on the same day and I am here to warn you that only @EmilyMiller is allowed to do that.

I am keeping an eye on you, troublemaker...

Yeah, I couldn't be bothered to switch to four of my alts yesterday, so I just posted as... (checks avatar) nice90sguy.

And if I pissed off the school prefect, that's great!

 

[nice90sguy]

Come to think of it, I see he posted a thread that linked to itself without mentioning Douglas Hofstadter, so you may have a point.

Em

I actually met him once, at an AI conference. Nothing happened, we were both married at the time.