My First Troll!

[PrevertOne]

Yaaay! My first troll! (Anonymous comment to "Lavender: Part 3"). I knew if I worked hard enough (with help from editors) I could get one (it's very funny BTW). Now I'm really going to submit. It's spiting time!

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

You have to be exceptionally awful to get a troll comment, so congrats!

 

[Huckleman2000]

[something, something, something....]

And now you've had your second!

 

[Zeb_Carter]

Don't listen to Jim, he's so awful that he doesn't even submit stories here.

 

[BlackShanglan]

Well done, Prevert! The squalls of philistines are more noble honors than any laurels they could set on your brows, and the same certainly goes for Mr. Johnson. It's a delightful moment in an author's life when one acquires one's first troll - I'll raise a glass to you to celebrate.

 

[CopperSkink]

How long did it take? I got mine in the first day and he stayed with me for the whole week, making the same snide comments after I deleted the previous ones <3

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Don't listen to Jim, he's so awful that he doesn't even submit stories here.

If you lie with dogs you get fleas.

 

[geronimo_appleby]

If you lie with dogs you get fleas.

i try to lie with a straight face, but i usually get caught out.

oh, and trolls? *whispers* Loving Wives.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Dogs are smarter than people; if you lie to Poochy you get some nasty fleas.

Stories on LIT are pretty much applications to join the Special Olympics of Writing. All your pals applaude you running around in circles, drooling, and you get a sweet plastic trophy.

 

[BlackShanglan]

How long did it take? I got mine in the first day and he stayed with me for the whole week, making the same snide comments after I deleted the previous ones <3

It's astonishing, the length of time some of them will continue to post comments no one can be bothered to read. It's as if they felt some obsessive compulsion to communicate their internal resentments to the world.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

My feelings are hurt! My trolls only make one contemptuous smear and then depart. It's like they either have no staying power or don't feel that insulting me is worth the effort. But how many bad things can you say about a bear?

 

[Zeb_Carter]

My feelings are hurt! My trolls only make one contemptuous smear and then depart. It's like they either have no staying power or don't feel that insulting me is worth the effort. But how many bad things can you say about a bear?

That's because they already got their rocks off, so they roll over and go to sleep.

 

[BlackShanglan]

Hmm. This confirms a theory I have long held: a good spewing of bile is the troll equivalent of climax.

 

[PrevertOne]

How long did it take? I got mine in the first day and he stayed with me for the whole week, making the same snide comments after I deleted the previous ones <3

Took me two posts and part 3 of the third to land one. Jim Johnson doesn't count. He has to supply evidence that he read the story to qualify.

 

[CopperSkink]

I hope the story was touching for someone to give it such special attention, even negative attention. I wish my own pet jellyfish would've had something clever to denounce about my writing, but apparantly the only thing that upset him about it was that I'd put it in the incest category.

Side note, someone with an actual name left a comment on another of my stories, giving it a less-than-flattering vote and saying, "That was not about incest. That ending was punk style."

Granted I don't know what "punk style" means, at least he had written his name down, so I was able to write him back and say, "I know it wasn't about incest, that's why I put it in the group sex category."

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Hmm. This confirms a theory I have long held: a good spewing of bile is the troll equivalent of climax.

Maybe the stories really do suck.

 

[geronimo_appleby]

Maybe the stories really do suck.

at some point i'd say it was a requirement - although not so much in the lesbian category.