My First Story...Any Feedback?

[Lusciousladyf]

If anyone is interested in reading my first Lit. story, I would appreciate any feedback you are willing to give.

Thank you for your time and interest.

www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php/37343

 

[Weird Harold]

If anyone is interested in reading my first Lit. story, I would appreciate any feedback you are willing to give.

It's in second person. That's a bad sign, and I didn't read any fuirther than, "Your day begins with a morning wake up call, ..."

 

[lobito]

Re: Re: My First Story...Any Feedback?

It's in second person. That's a bad sign, and I didn't read any fuirther than, "Your day begins with a morning wake up call, ..."

Gotta agree on that point, though I did get a bit farther. It's a personal thing,a dn the story may be good, but you wanted feedback, and so the feedback we have to give so far, is that it's not the kind that we would read.

Lo

 

[Lusciousladyf]

Re: Re: My First Story...Any Feedback?

It's in second person. That's a bad sign, and I didn't read any fuirther than, "Your day begins with a morning wake up call, ..."

Thank you for your time...I am sorry that you did not read it through. I was opting for a more personal touch...letting the reader the freedom to allow themselves to escape into a fantasy ...one that allows them the ability to place themselves on the receiving end.

Care to explain why second person writing does not appeal to you? I would most interested to know that and if any others feel that way. It will allow me to revise my next story accordingly.

Thanks again

 

[Lusciousladyf]

My Apologies

I was not aware there was a seperate section for feedback on stories until I posted this...so if you want to let this die out and go to the other section, I would appreciate that.

Thanks Patient 1 for pointing this out to me...that is how we all learn.

 

[lobito]

No need to say your sorry, we're simply saying it's not OUR thing, some out there do like that way it was written, I'm sure.

I write as if I'm there in the story, personally.

Lo

 

[thumbs2_ca]

Hi

I enjoy second person stories and thought it was a good story LL. keep your hand in the writing and yes this is the way we all learn. My stories were second person as well and I got some bad reviews but each to their own and I was glad to get any feedback as I learned from them all.
I got some very good reviews as well so there is more of us out there.

 

[Lusciousladyf]

No need to say your sorry, we're simply saying it's not OUR thing, some out there do like that way it was written, I'm sure.

I write as if I'm there in the story, personally.

Lo

Thanks Lo! I appreciate ALL feedback...good and bad! I want to produce stories people enjoy..that is, after all, the purpose of Lit.

I was merely apologizing for placing this in the General Board section not realizing the proper place to post this as someone so kindly pointed out to me.

Thanks again for your advice and your time.

 

[Lusciousladyf]

Re: Hi

I enjoy second person stories and thought it was a good story LL. keep your hand in the writing and yes this is the way we all learn. My stories were second person as well and I got some bad reviews but each to their own and I was glad to get any feedback as I learned from them all.
I got some very good reviews as well so there is more of us out there.

Thank you !! I am glad that you enjoyed it! I appreciate your kind words and encouragement. This is what I wanted...good, honest feedback...good or bad

 

[Trinka]

I read your story all the way through. Most stories aren't writtin in second person, so it was hard to get into in the beginning. I had to think about what you were trying to do with the writing style to place myself on the receiving end. The story itself was good

Good luck!

 

[Lusciousladyf]

I read your story all the way through. Most stories aren't writtin in second person, so it was hard to get into in the beginning. I had to think about what you were trying to do with the writing style to place myself on the receiving end. The story itself was good

Good luck!

Thanks !! I appreciate your feedback!