My First Editor's Choice!!!

[Black_Bird]

... And guess what? I've got TWO of them!

Angel of Mercy

Save the Girl

Okay - that's enough tooting my own horn for today. Thank You.

 

[daughter]

CONGRATULATIONS

Happy for you Black Bird.

Keep it hot!

Peace,

daughter

 

[Debbie]

Congratualtions! Off to read them.

 

[MaxSebastian]

Hey, I really enjoyed your stories.

Perhaps there should have been a more obvious link between them, because I stupidly didn't realise they were related until I started the 2nd one, so I wasn't expecting that.

Actually I quite like that they were separate stories, though. I sometimes think a single story from more than one POV looks a trifle tacky - particularly if done poorly. But it worked this way.

I have to say, reading Save the Girl at first, it started out really bugging me. Here was a story in the romance category, but every time some form of romantic feeling started to show, it was abruptly cut off by the narrator. An example:

>She snuggles up to me and mumbles "I feel safe with you," or some bullshit like that.

But reading on, it really made sense because your characterisation was really pretty good, especially for a first person POV. This was reinforced in the second story, where the narrator felt differently about different things, but was still essentially afraid of the whole romantic thing.

That fear of romantic involvement that they both seemed to share began to crack by the end of the stories, and I think that was what I found most interesting, most involving about the whole project.

I hope that a sequel (or sequels) tying these stories together will resolve this conflict the two characters are going through.

Oh, and I liked the fact that both of them were finding flaws in each other, but that even unsaid, they seemed to have feelings for each other awakened by their run-in. I'd like to see those feelings explored further too, but who am I to make demands!

very well done,


Max.

 

[Black_Bird]

Max...

There will be one final part to the story, a final meeting between the two of them - third person, not first. I have a number of surprises in store for you, too.

You are right - the two stories don't fit the preconceived notion of a romance story. I wanted a romance story about two seriously screwed up individuals; I wanted to show that love is an emotion that even the humblest of men and women can feel - not just those big breasted women, and multimilionare chip n' dale wanta-bes that we see in porns and read about in trashy romance novels...

Both of these characters are very earthy and very insecure.

As for linking the two stories together? I thought about that, but decided it was better to let them both stand on their own ground.

Daughter, thanks!
Debbie, thank you for the feedback. It's nice to see that my trick-pony worked.

 

[*ladylove*]

way to go!!!!

I enjoyed both reads! I sent all my feedback with the feedback opportunity at the end of the story, so I wont get all wordy and stuff here.

But I will say I'm really looking forward to the next part of the story!

*lady*