Mixed Metaphors...

[BlackShanglan]

the slings and arrows are only suffered.

The point being that one suffers the arrows and sling stones (or bullets).

 

[NoJo]

This thread is beginning to suffer from the law of diminishing fleas.

 

[Stella_Omega]

This morning, someone pointed out that a mutual acquaintance is not the sharpest apple in the cupboard.

 

[denalirayne]

I think my mother was a bit off when she taught me, "Never accept candy from a stranger unless he offers you a ride." Now I wonder if her freudian slip was showing. . .

A friend of mine is fond of saying, "It will be a cold say in hell when that snowball rolls uphill."

One of my students proclaimed, "The gun is mightier than the sword."

Although it is not a mixed metaphor, I have to share that my partner makes me crazy when she tells me it's a "mute point" in an argument. I want to scream, "moot! MOOT!"

 

[BlackShanglan]

This morning, someone pointed out that a mutual acquaintance is not the sharpest apple in the cupboard.

*laughs*

Brilliant. I just love the irony of the context in which the metaphor was mixed.

Why don't I get friends and colleagues like that?

 

[SeaCat]

LOLOL

Sorry I'm late.

One of my favorites is;

A watched pot gathers no Moss.

My father is prone to saying things like;

An idiot and his money are fun to watch, or, That dog don't jump.

Cat

 

[DerelictionOfSanity]

TO Vermilion:

I've heard: "Put that in your smipe and poke it!" (Put that in your pipe and smoke it)

 

[ninefe2dg]

Thanks for all the posts...

...love the spoonerisms, too. Feel free to keep those coming, too.

Was on a biz trip and heard a nice mix of two hackneyed biz phrases...

We're ahead of the cutting edge.
Then the person got quoted...like he said, we're ahead of the cutting edge.

I got so pumped knowing we had so surpassed the cutting edge!

 

[Vermilion]

TO Vermilion:

I've heard: "Put that in your smipe and poke it!" (Put that in your pipe and smoke it)

Ah yes... but what is a smipe?

x
V

 

[gauchecritic]

Ah yes... but what is a smipe?

x
V

Whatever it is you have to poke it.

 

[ninefe2dg]

Whatever it is you have to poke it.

i got my smipe poked once and I was sore for weeks...

It hurt so good, though...

 

[CharleyH]

...The other day I was in a meeting, trying to say "one man's meat is another man's poison", and it came out..."one man's goose is another man's gander"...I caught myself as I said it and laughed it off, so at least I wasn't a total moron.

Anyway, it made me think how mixed metaphors could sound pretty funny...post any you may have ever heard, or feel free to make up your own...

Thought of this one today...

"Either put up, or get off the pot"...

Enjoy!

I rarely fuck up my metaphors, but others do misinterpret them.

 

[Vermilion]

Excellent. Just heard an estate agent on one of those awful relocation programmes describe a house as 'an open canvas' !!!
lol
x
V

 

[BlackShanglan]

From a Lit thread troll:

"Like moths to a flame. Pavlovian."

A very little knowledge is indeed a dangerous thing. Or so thought the dogs as Pavlov attempted to teach them to salivate at the sight of the open flame he was about to throw them into.

 

[DerelictionOfSanity]

I'd like to give another phrase, but I've got tickets to Fiddler on a hot tin roof.

 

[TE999]

I have heard 'Don't count your chickens in one basket'.

Presumeably they hatched in there.

 

[ninefe2dg]

I have heard 'Don't count your chickens in one basket'.

Presumeably they hatched in there.

Very nice!

I heard what I think was an intended mix by Jim Rome last week...after an interview with Bob Costas on Barry Bonds, which Rome thought went very well...

[Costas] put it in the upper deck. Game, set, match.

I know Rome knows better. Probably on purpose...

 

[DeeZire]

"I hope we get to the bottom of the answer." G.W Bush
"I think we ought to make the pie higher." G.W. Bush
"Farmers will be in the forethought of our thinking." G.W. Bush
"We need a full affront on the energy crisis." G.W. Bush
"Our administration is making the right decisions to bring the solution to an end." G.W. Bush (Truer words were never spoken.)

 

[kissofbliss]

well...

bush is an idiot...so the whole crazy mixed metaphor is expected