Men With Hammers vs. Your Bathroom

[shereads]

As a rule of thumb, whatever the contractor tells you is going to have to be replaced once the hammering begins, double it.



That distant shattering sound you heard if you are within a 1200-mile radius of Miami was my first hint that removing a tile floor involves destroying a mirror wall - and possibly an antique stained glass window, although I am too big a coward to look.

I apologize for the high-pitched squeal of outrage that has dogs howling as far away as Tibet.

 

[Liar]

That was you? I'll be darned.

 

[Kev H]

Unfortunately, these days there is an enormous gulf between a "man with a hammer" and a craftsman. But, don't get me started.

In short, I feel your pain.

 

[shereads]

That was you? I'll be darned.

I've been assured that the squeal was only audible to dogs and certain species of bats. Is your bat upset?

 

[cloudy]

I've been assured that the squeal was only audible to dogs and certain species of bats. Is your bat upset?

I'll be sending you the bill for the window.

 

[shereads]

I'll be sending you the bill for the window.

No problem. Just have your nearest Home Depot bill it to "Project Bathroom Floor." They know me.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Didn't you give the hammerman a stern look before he started swinging that thing, and told him "you break it, I take it off your salary"?

 

[OhMissScarlett]

As a rule of thumb, whatever the contractor tells you is going to have to be replaced once the hammering begins, double it.



That distant shattering sound you heard if you are within a 1200-mile radius of Miami was my first hint that removing a tile floor involves destroying a mirror wall - and possibly an antique stained glass window, although I am too big a coward to look.

I apologize for the high-pitched squeal of outrage that has dogs howling as far away as Tibet.

*shakes head* I bet they didn't even have the common decency to strip off their shirts and look hot while they were demolishing the beloved jungle compound.

 

[cloudy]

*shakes head* I bet they didn't even have the common decency to strip off their shirts and look hot while they were demolishing the beloved jungle compound.

damn them.

 

[shereads]

Didn't you give the hammerman a stern look before he started swinging that thing, and told him "you break it, I take it off your salary"?

Are you kidding? After the 2005 hurricane season, having a person in your home who is willing to accept money for attempting to repair something is considered a lucky break comparable to winning the lottery, or learning that you dreamed the 2000 and 2004 U.S. presidential elections.

Threaten them? I'll be grateful if they don't demand that I clean up the broken glass myself, after I blow them.

 

[TheEarl]

*shakes head* I bet they didn't even have the common decency to strip off their shirts and look hot while they were demolishing the beloved jungle compound.

<------

Compensation?

The (egocentric) Earl


PS. Sorry to hear about your men with hammers. Are they paying for the damage?

 

[Guest]

Are you kidding? After the 2005 hurricane season, having a person in your home who is willing to accept money for attempting to repair something is considered a lucky break comparable to winning the lottery, or learning that you dreamed the 2000 and 2004 U.S. presidential elections.

Threaten them? I'll be grateful if they don't demand that I clean up the broken glass myself, after I blow them.

It's true. There is STILL roof work being done (today, as it happens) in my neighborhood, and the novelty has not yet worn off for the rest of us. WE don't gather around to stare like we did 4-6 months ago, but you do notice cars slowing down.

Be nice to them, Shereads! If they actually fix something, you'll be the envy of your whole block (good luck with your project )

 

[Liar]

I've been assured that the squeal was only audible to dogs and certain species of bats. Is your bat upset?

Poor thing is still hyperventilating.

 

[Guest]

<------

Compensation?

The (egocentric) Earl


PS. Sorry to hear about your men with hammers. Are they paying for the damage?

you mean only SHE gets to look at that? Damn -- and its some of my favorite parts!

(obediently averting eyes -- a little)

 

[Andreina]

if i'd live anywhere near you i'd let my dog piss on their car

 

[Guest]

I'll be grateful if they don't demand that I clean up the broken glass myself, after I blow them.

Hmm, the way you phrase that, it sounds like they'd demand you clean up the glass, while you offered them the bj on your own.

I'm sure I mis-understood.

 

[kendo1]

I wield a mighty hammer.
Told the people I'm doing some work for that the false roof needs to come down.
They have just had it put up!

There is nothing so nice as the sound of a claw hammer breaking through plaster board.
I've taken up most of the floorboards.
The way I look at it is: they still have four walls.

 

[cantdog]

Destruction is fun. Creation is fun. Maintenance sucks.

Sorry beyond words, Shereads. I know how little has been able to be repaired down on the coast. I do hope you told them, "Just for that, I'm not gonna blow you."

 

[lucky-E-leven]

I feel almost guilty for telling you to feel lucky but the last time we had men swinging hammers inside, Vella left the experience with a concussion.

Not pretty.

 

[Guest]

lucky and i were thinking about starting our own home repair and lightly peppered political business....
Two Chicks with Hammers.
we'd do your floor with no sex just promises of your Lewis Black-esque monologue.. possibly a mimosa too...

 

[lucky-E-leven]

lucky and i were thinking about starting our own home repair and lightly peppered political business....
Two Chicks with Hammers.
we'd do your floor with no sex just promises of your Lewis Black-esque monologue.. possibly a mimosa too...

Mat and Min are the top two on our Reference List.
Please contact them for Customer Satisfaction inquiries.

 

[Guest]

Mat and Min are the top two on our Reference List.
Please contact them for Customer Satisfaction inquiries.

I remember. They posted this notice at the time.

http://www.strangecosmos.com/images/content/107226.jpg

 

[lucky-E-leven]

I remember. They posted this notice at the time.

http://www.strangecosmos.com/images/content/107226.jpg

Yeah. I'm sure they did. Though, I wouldn't mind one bit.

 

[SeaCat]

Good luck.

The house where I am currently living lost half the shingles from it's roof. Of course to get it repaired means the landlord needs to get off his lazy ass and hire a contractor, who then needs to purchase the permits for the work from the county. Somehow I don't see this happening any time soon.

Of course I could have gotten the permits myself, gone down to Home Depot and picked up the shingles and had the work done in less than a day. Minor problem with that. They refuse to give out the permits to private cits., you have to have your contractors liscence. (Another minor problem, the cost for the materials and for the permits would have to come out of my pocket, he ignores any bills I send him.)

Cat

 

[Liar]

Good luck.

The house where I am currently living lost half the shingles from it's roof. Of course to get it repaired means the landlord needs to get off his lazy ass and hire a contractor, who then needs to purchase the permits for the work from the county. Somehow I don't see this happening any time soon.

Of course I could have gotten the permits myself, gone down to Home Depot and picked up the shingles and had the work done in less than a day. Minor problem with that. They refuse to give out the permits to private cits., you have to have your contractors liscence. (Another minor problem, the cost for the materials and for the permits would have to come out of my pocket, he ignores any bills I send him.)

Cat

You need a permit to repair stuff that is broken? Even if you're a professional contractor?