Men Don't Listen: a VERY funny joke

cymbidia

unrepentant pervert
Joined
Mar 8, 2001
Posts
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MEN DON'T LISTEN...

A gentleman had a serious problem. He had made several attempts to get into the men's restroom, but found it to be occupied. A lady noticed that he was walking funny, taking small steps, and with a look of pain and anxiety on his face.

"Sir," she said, "the ladies restroom is unoccupied. You may use it if you promise not to touch any of the buttons on the wall." He was about to pop, and would have promised anything, so he agreed to her terms.

The relief was pure joy, and as he sat there , savoring the feeling, he noticed the buttons he had promised not to touch. Three white buttons were identified by the letters: WW, WA, and PP, and there was one red button labeled ATR.

Who would really know if he touched them? He couldn't just sit there and resist a challenge like this, so he pushed the WW button. Warm water was sprayed gently upon his bottom. Such a nice feeling came over him. The men's restroom didn't have nice things like this.

Anticipating even greater pleasure, he pressed he WA button. Warm Air replaced the warm water, wafted and swirled about, gently drying his underside.

He knew what he was going to do when the warm air stopped, and without hesitation, he pressed the PP button. A large powder puff caressed his bottom, adding a fragrant scent of spring flowers to his unbelievable pleasure.

The ladies room was far more than a restroom; it was a place of tender loving pleasure! He could hardly wait for the powder puff to quit. When it did, he pushed what he knew was going to be the ultimate joy!...

He knew he was in the hospital as soon as he opened his eyes. A nurse eyes staring down at him with a smirk on her face. "What happened? How did I get here? The last thing I remember, I was in the ladies restroom!"

"You pushed too many buttons," replied the nurse, as her smirk expanded to a grin. "That last button marked ATR is an Automatic Tampon Remover. Your penis is under your pillow."
 
I have heard this one, but told with a slightly different ending.

The red button put tampons in, not take them out. He came out of the bathroom with a peculiar expression, and the girl said, Well, you didn't listen, did you?
 
oh yeah...well whaddaya think about this?

two women on a road trip pull over too tired to continue driving. in the middle of nowhere they see a billboard for a new luxury hotel with extremely low rates. they decide to stop for the night and upon arriving the desk clerk informs them the hotel is just opening that very minute and they are the very first customers.
"All the rooms are open ladies. just wander about the establishment and when you find one you like, simply ring down to the desk and we will provide you with a key and whatever else you would like."
"Does that include the luxury suites?" one of the ladies inquired.
"madam, all the rooms here are luxury suites. it is only the floors that are different. see for yourselves."
excited, the two ladies raced to the elevator and pressed one. when the door opened they saw a sign that read,"first floor: men w/ huge cocks." they giggled and said, "oh my, i wonder what's on two?" they pressed two where the sign read, "Floor two: men with big cocks who listen." Well, we'll simply have to try three wont we?" "Floor three: rich men with big cocks who listen." "Well, we've come this far...may as well see what the top floor has to offer." they pushed four. the doors opened and the sign read, "this is the fourth floor. there is nothing here. it was only built to prove that you cannot satisfy a woman."
 
paganangel,

LOL, very good.

But hey I got more than satisfied night before last... 9.15 pm and 2.35 am!
 
Damn, that hurts me just thinking about it. Let alone how pissed Midnight Angel would be at me for messin up her playground.
 
~laughing till my sides hurt~ Truer words have never been spoken!!!! GREAT joke with a lot of truth there!
 
Thank you SO much for posting this joke. The first time I heard it I laughed aloud for several minutes. I had quite forgotten some of the details and so appreciate finding it again!
Humor is what will get us thru Life.....laughing is healthy...especially when someone is particularly trying to annoy you. If you look at them and laugh at their cruelty or rudeness it discombobulates them to such a degree you can see them searching desperately for a pithy response. Cruel people are rarely clever....merely cruel. Laughter is a cup to sip from daily! Thank you again!
 
HEHEHEHEHE.

That was so so so so so so funny. I know sevral men that would do just that. HEHEHE wonder if the Penis farie came and left him a quarter
 
hahahahaha

wonderful joke, cym...thanks!

by the way, where is this bathroom? i think i'd pay to use it
 
Nice joke, Cym. :D I think I heard it a million years ago but had forgotten the ending.
 
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