Meeting people thru Lit: akin to buying lottery tickets

[MMM_wms]

Because even likeable people here are bound to get ghosted from one day to the next, while a relationship is in the formation process. This sort of thing had not happened to me for years, I mean running into a ghosting woman, with whom I got along very very well, as we were getting to know each other. And then “wham bang” all of a sudden?

I cannot deny this sort of negative feedback shakes up my self-esteem. And when it happens in the form of ghosting, there is no chance of learning anything thru feedback. Did my enthusiasm bordering on exuberance turn her off, even though she praised me for it in the beginning? Or has she fallen for Donald Trump’s propaganda after all? Or am I too old for her, even though she wrote me otherwise?

Or was this woman merely a faker and a prankster? Maybe not even a woman at all? I will never know, I suppose. Ghosting is a crime deserving capital punishment, I am still convinced of this. There is NO fucking excuse for it, since anybody -- unless she got run over by a bus suddenly -- can sit down and write a friendly “dear John” letter with a minimum of explanation in it. OK, nobody here is owed this, but common decency says otherwise.

I know here on Lit, the opinion abounds that people ought to take getting ghosted lightly and in stride. I have no choice about it; I’ll have to take it this way, but I still hurts. And somebody doing the ghosting ought to be ashamed of herself; it is a sign of a cowardly or of a devious character for sure. There ought to be a way of ostracizing Lit members for it, IMHO.

Trouble is getting ghosted is nothing a sensible man will simply ignore, even if no guilt on his part is apperant. I can only hope I will “run into some compensation” again soon, but that is not certain either.

Now I am wondering, how many smart asses will show up, telling me I deserve getting ghosted for one reason or another. I know that gullibility gets punished easily, but does that really mean I deserve it?

Well, just in case you are a woman looking for a connection with some substance, what do you think about taking a look at my other personal ads, in case you agree with me? Maybe you’ll discover I can be a likeable man after all?
.

 

[Unravelx]

If someone ghosted it's a good indicator that the dynamic seemed better to you than it did to them.

Find different people or different dynamics.

There's lots of reasons someone might ghost. They could have issues, could have just been messing around / early experimentation, could have just run into something more fun for them personally... Could be anything.

It's frustrating but pick up and move on.

Smartass opinion as requested: I wouldn't lead a personals ad with how annoyed you are at someone (and at one point wished them dead); doesn't give the best impression.

 

[MMM_wms]

thanks for responding, unravelx.

But I was not asking for explanation for why someone acts in an un-excusable manner. Nor do I care to hear you opinion on what might be a better strategy. All I wanted is vent my anger and my disappointmen, regardless of consequences.

 

[macymadison]

thanks for responding, unravelx.

But I was not asking for explanation for why someone acts in an un-excusable manner. Nor do I care to hear you opinion on what might be a better strategy. All I wanted is vent my anger and my disappointmen, regardless of consequences.

You do realize that every ad you put up is a treasure trove of red flags for women, right? You sound scary and angry and quick to judge and sometimes that’s why a person gets ghosted.

 

[ComplexSituation]

You do realize that every ad you put up is a treasure trove of red flags for women, right? You sound scary and angry and quick to judge and sometimes that’s why a person gets ghosted.

Thank you for saying this!

As a fellow poster I worry about people may lump all of us together.

 

[MMM_wms]

You do realize that every ad you put up is a treasure trove of red flags for women, right? You sound scary and angry and quick to judge and sometimes that’s why a person gets ghosted.

hello to you, Macy from Wisconsin, interesting to see that you consider a man unimpressed by Trump's propaganda as a man raising red flags.

Or a man reflecting on his own shortcomings. In Wisconsin people don't have shortcomings, I suppose. We all know that by who you helped occupy a desk in the WH for 4 years.

In Wisconsin people don't bother reading posts either, which they set out to criticise, so it seems from your post. Would you possess any reading skill whatsover, you would not have composed your post a all.

I am glad at least that I was able to give you something to rant on

 

[AnotherDude99]

tell me glBock

why did you change your username ? your postings manner as well as your rants are pretty much the same as your previous usernames.

i am just curious. feel free to ignore, because i maybe a Klugscheißer

 

[MMM_wms]

why did you change your username ? your postings manner as well as your rants are pretty much the same as your previous usernames.

i am just curious. feel free to ignore, because i maybe a Klugscheißer

you cannot possibly be a Klugscheißer, dude, because KS are literate enough to spell words correctly. Also a Klugscheißer with 91 posts to his credit like you, has started at least one or two of his own, just to show that he has an original idea of his own now and then.

But your specialty seems more to pirate other people's posts and accuse them of something you are not capable of yourself. So keep on trucking and be just another dude.

 

[macymadison]

hello to you, Macy from Wisconsin, interesting to see that you consider a man unimpressed by Trump's propaganda as a man raising red flags.

Or a man reflecting on his own shortcomings. In Wisconsin people don't have shortcomings, I suppose. We all know that by who you helped occupy a desk in the WH for 4 years.

In Wisconsin people don't bother reading posts either, which they set out to criticise, so it seems from your post. Would you possess any reading skill whatsover, you would not have composed your post a all.

I am glad at least that I was able to give you something to rant on

Although you just proved the point I was making, I was actually offering you some insight. Sometimes people don’t hear how offensive their tone is when they write. I was letting you know how I felt because you had sent me a private message in response to my ad a while ago. While your message seemed thoughtful and nice enough, I went back and looked at your other posts and thought you seem to be incredibly angry and not like the nice man who messaged me at all. If I’m doing that, it’s a safe bet that other women are doing that also. If your complaint is people ghosting you, maybe you want to sound less pissed off.

And not everyone in Wisconsin is a Trump fan, just FYI.

 

[sheltering]

Never gamble more than you can afford to lose ~

 

[MMM_wms]

Although you just proved the point I was making, I was actually offering you some insight. Sometimes people don’t hear how offensive their tone is when they write. I was letting you know how I felt because you had sent me a private message in response to my ad a while ago. While your message seemed thoughtful and nice enough, I went back and looked at your other posts and thought you seem to be incredibly angry and not like the nice man who messaged me at all. If I’m doing that, it’s a safe bet that other women are doing that also. If your complaint is people ghosting you, maybe you want to sound less pissed off.

And not everyone in Wisconsin is a Trump fan, just FYI.

Macy, you put me at ease about how Wisconsin may vote this year, thank you much. And I apologize for not listening to you carefully enough. I could not quite recollect why you and I never clicked, when we had commuicated with each other briefly.

Now you must admit, if you are willing to think fairly, that you judging my other posts "incrediblly angry" and not nice enough for you, is a rather subjective judgement. I cannot undo anything I have written, and I do not mean to. But I can assure you that a few women other than you, have seen me in a much more positive light.

Sometimes a personal trait of a particular man can be seen condemnable by one woman, and loveable by another. Of course I am much fonder of the latter than of the former kind of woman.

I am glad at least, that we have been able to talk about this, and I thank you for your persistence, Had you not taken the trouble to post another time on this thread, I would have gone to sleep thinking less of you.
.
So that was a good outcome, for me at least.I hope for you too.

 

[elizabeth15]

why did you change your username ? your postings manner as well as your rants are pretty much the same as your previous usernames.

i am just curious. feel free to ignore, because i maybe a Klugscheißer

Oh fucking hell. It’s that guy again, isn’t it? Ladies, be careful. Not that y'all don't have enough information to go on already, but this guy's a known quantity who tends to insult and harass women he PMs with. He also usually has multiple accounts going, so keep an eye out for his writing style and his relentless negativity and steer clear. Stay safe out there!