Masculine submission

[Dirtygirlndeer]

I crave to be dominated by a strong woman. Not just physically, but mentally as well.

I tried to get my wife do something simple - spank me. I even made her several paddles and switches. But she is simply not able or not willing to do it. Since we're monogamous, this fantasy will likely never be fulfilled.

That makes me sad, as she is missing a golden opportunity to bring the two of you even closer.

 

[NancyPan]

That makes me sad, as she is missing a golden opportunity to bring the two of you even closer.

So true. And there are significant benefits to her. Your task is to help her understand that.

 

[magic_rat]

First off there is no normal,

That covers everything.

I'm a fairly typical dom guy with women. I'm extremely sub with men. Except I'm experimenting with letting a woman domme me. And next week I might go in a different direction.

People get hung up on labels. They like pigeonholes and categorisations. They work, to a degree on places like Fetlife, to help you find your tribe, but they are restrictive too.

 

[magic_rat]

That makes me sad, as she is missing a golden opportunity to bring the two of you even closer.

More sad if you push her into doing something she doesn't want to do. That won't make you closer, it'll drive a wedge.

 

[magic_rat]

I crave to be dominated by a strong woman. Not just physically, but mentally as well.

I tried to get my wife do something simple - spank me. I even made her several paddles and switches. But she is simply not able or not willing to do it. Since we're monogamous, this fantasy will likely never be fulfilled.

Put a spin on it.

By deliberately withholding thje thing you crave most, she is exerting maximum mental domination on you.

 

[NancyPan]

More sad if you push her into doing something she doesn't want to do. That won't make you closer, it'll drive a wedge.derable thought and much reading on the topic, I

Of course, and I would never suggest “pushing,” or demanding. Of course it doesn’t work. I waited years between the three times I brought it up with my wife. The first two times she said no and I accepted it, but honestly, held onto some resentment because I really wanted to serve her. The third time, after considerable thought and much reading on the subject, I approached it much differently. I asked her what I could do for her that would help her be willing to try giving me what I felt I needed to be happy. She took me quite seriously, took time to think about it, and we had some of the most honest talks of our marriage. Without going into detail, I will just say that I had to learn to make it all about her and what she wanted and wants and needs, how to truly submit and put my needs second to hers which included confessing my masturbation and giving her control of my orgasms.

We have now been in an FLR for years. Happy to discuss in more detail via PM with anyone who is truly serious about wanting to pursue an FLR.

 

[Goldenfinger]

So what is masculine submission. When I look it up it just says a male submissive. But is it more than that.

 

[Yarglenurp]

So what is masculine submission. When I look it up it just says a male submissive. But is it more than that.

I think everyone has their own interpretation.

I’m just going to offer mine totally subjective one that has no substantiation:

I picture it as metaphorically the woman is the queen, and the man is her stallion, guard dog, and chief minister. In a FLR with a “masculine” sub, the Queen sets the rules and policies, and the Male uses his strength and on-the-ground presence to figure out how best to implement those orders.

The masculine sub knows his place is not really at the woman’s feet… she has shoes for that. His real place is at the woman’s front, making sure there are no immediate dangers and finding new opportunities for the two of them to explore. This type of man emphasizes and maintains his physical strength because he knows it is useful for his queen, and he acts in a “masculine” fashion because he knows that it is what arouses his queen.

If she would command him to put on a dress, wear a corset, or suck another man’s cock, he’d do so without question. But he wouldn’t do it without orders because he knows that, on a practical level, such acts would be totally useless to her. Instead, he honors his queen by putting the full suite of strengths and skills at her disposal.

As for the Queen, she knows that even the strongest submissive needs guidance and respect in his life. She is there to make sure he stays on track with their goals, that he takes care of himself even as he’s working hard to take care of her, and that he knows how much his strengths and efforts are appreciated. She will praise and discipline him as appropriate to strengthen him, because his strength is her strength.

I keep putting masculine in quotes because I think actual masculinity is very subjective. However, the chief principle is that this type of masculinity is in service of the woman instead of being used to control the woman.

 

[policywank]

I think that gender stereotypes have really unfairly characterized the nature of masculinity. Leadership is not in my view synonymous with masculine.

Consider the military. It is built on strong followers. The vast majority of men (and women) in uniform are following their leader. In fact, they are required to do so with a very high level of discipline and obedience. Only a select few of them are leaders. There are people at various levels who are referred to as leaders, but very few of them are the people making the big decisions, setting the overall course and assuming overall leadership. Those interim layers "lead" in exactly the way and in the direction that they are told. In that sense they are more like a proxy for the true leaders.

Much the same dynamic exists in the workplace and throughout society. Most strong masculine men are doing what they are told by their bosses or the leaders in society.

Masculine men play submissive roles throughout society. Traditionally their leaders have been men. There is no reason a woman can't lead and want the same masculine traits in her followers as a male leader does. The whole notion of disparaging as weak a man who allows himself to be led by a woman is just a reflection of the sexism in our society.

To the extent that a submissive man wants to be less masculine that is a reflection of his true self wanting to pushback against society's expectations. That is a man who chooses to be less masculine. He doesn't become less masculine simply by virtue of having a woman as his leader.

And to the extent that a man who generally exhibits masculine traits is willing to engage in activities not normally associated with masculinity at the behest of his female leader that demonstrates his openness of mind. It doesn't change his fundamental nature. Being closed-minded, and intolerant of non-masculinity are not necessary traits for being masculine.

As a Dom, when I lead there is a fetish element to it. I push my Subs to test their obedience. And obedience is best demonstrated in doing things outside their comfort zone. It also requires an open mind. So yes I will push against some traditional masculine assumptions. But that does not rob them of their masculinity. It simply compels them to open their minds and challenge some of their own assumptions on the matter.

 

[Ashesh9]

The Feminine Divine
Is balanced by
The submissive masculine!!!
On my knees I surrender...
To My Queen!!!
As She doth proudly
Face-sit'n Preen:
She is Superior...
Not bitchy or mean!!!
To My Divine Feminine....
From Her
Submissive masculine....

 

[NancyPan]

I think that gender stereotypes have really unfairly characterized the nature of masculinity. Leadership is not in my view synonymous with masculine.

Consider the military. It is built on strong followers. The vast majority of men (and women) in uniform are following their leader. In fact, they are required to do so with a very high level of discipline and obedience. Only a select few of them are leaders. There are people at various levels who are referred to as leaders, but very few of them are the people making the big decisions, setting the overall course and assuming overall leadership. Those interim layers "lead" in exactly the way and in the direction that they are told. In that sense they are more like a proxy for the true leaders.

Much the same dynamic exists in the workplace and throughout society. Most strong masculine men are doing what they are told by their bosses or the leaders in society.

Masculine men play submissive roles throughout society. Traditionally their leaders have been men. There is no reason a woman can't lead and want the same masculine traits in her followers as a male leader does. The whole notion of disparaging as weak a man who allows himself to be led by a woman is just a reflection of the sexism in our society.

To the extent that a submissive man wants to be less masculine that is a reflection of his true self wanting to pushback against society's expectations. That is a man who chooses to be less masculine. He doesn't become less masculine simply by virtue of having a woman as his leader.

And to the extent that a man who generally exhibits masculine traits is willing to engage in activities not normally associated with masculinity at the behest of his female leader that demonstrates his openness of mind. It doesn't change his fundamental nature. Being closed-minded, and intolerant of non-masculinity are not necessary traits for being masculine.

As a Dom, when I lead there is a fetish element to it. I push my Subs to test their obedience. And obedience is best demonstrated in doing things outside their comfort zone. It also requires an open mind. So yes I will push against some traditional masculine assumptions. But that does not rob them of their masculinity. It simply compels them to open their minds and challenge some of their own assumptions on the matter.

Thank you for this thoughtful comment. As I think you know, I am one of those males who has “lived up to” gender stereotypes as an athlete, a father, in my career, and in many other ways in my day-to-day life. Yet, I have always desired female leadership and authority in my life. Plus, I have desired to emulate femininity and to be allowed to wear feminine clothing, particularly women’s underwear (and in my marriage being allowed to do so has been clearly defined as a privilege).

When I serve and submit to my wife, I never give up or lose my masculinity. However, I have for years been quite aware that I am inadequate as a traditional male lover and that I am lucky that my wife allows me to worship her and please her in other ways. I am not a “masculine lover,” but I do believe she sees me as masculine in our partnership and considers me to be a masculine companion (even though I am wearing panties under my otherwise “masculine” clothing). She often will tell me that I am “handsome,” even though in the bedroom she is not shy about humiliating me sexually.

I can both be “her man” and her sissy. The two are not mutually exclusive.

 

[policywank]

Thank you for this thoughtful comment. As I think you know, I am one of those males who has “lived up to” gender stereotypes as an athlete, a father, in my career, and in many other ways in my day-to-day life. Yet, I have always desired female leadership and authority in my life. Plus, I have desired to emulate femininity and to be allowed to wear feminine clothing, particularly women’s underwear (and in my marriage being allowed to do so has been clearly defined as a privilege).

When I serve and submit to my wife, I never give up or lose my masculinity. However, I have for years been quite aware that I am inadequate as a traditional male lover and that I am lucky that my wife allows me to worship her and please her in other ways. I am not a “masculine lover,” but I do believe she sees me as masculine in our partnership and considers me to be a masculine companion (even though I am wearing panties under my otherwise “masculine” clothing). She often will tell me that I am “handsome,” even though in the bedroom she is not shy about humiliating me sexually.

I can both be “her man” and her sissy. The two are not mutually exclusive.

There are lots of guys who would consider themselves masculine or present themselves as such, who are not good lovers. Or who do not measure up to what they actually claim are masculine traits.

The thing is that in modern society a lot of guys can just put on an act and talk the talk up to a point. They can't go around starting fights or telling women they have a huge penis because they will be found out. But they can get a big truck, pump some iron and espouse traditional male values projecting a form of masculinity.

This is off topic a bit but I am reminded of a comment I read from a political organizer in Alberta (cowboy country in Canada). This person made the point that when they were organizing events for the financial and business types in Calgary they would all show up in their oversized trucks which they probably never used for any real work. And when they organized events in the rural areas for the actual ranchers and farmers they'd be more likely to show up in a Subaru. No doubt that had trucks and lots of other equipment that was actually used for work. But for a quick trip into town to attend a meeting they went with whatever was most practical feeling no need to prove their bona fides.

As with my earlier point, those guys are masculine but they aren't leaders or alphas in most cases.

 

[Yarglenurp]

There are lots of guys who would consider themselves masculine or present themselves as such, who are not good lovers. Or who do not measure up to what they actually claim are masculine traits.

The thing is that in modern society a lot of guys can just put on an act and talk the talk up to a point. They can't go around starting fights or telling women they have a huge penis because they will be found out. But they can get a big truck, pump some iron and espouse traditional male values projecting a form of masculinity.

This is off topic a bit but I am reminded of a comment I read from a political organizer in Alberta (cowboy country in Canada). This person made the point that when they were organizing events for the financial and business types in the Calgary they would all show up in their oversized trucks which they probably never used for any real work. And when they organized events in the rural areas for the actual ranchers and farmers they'd be more likely to show up in a Subaru. No doubt that had trucks and lots of other equipment that was actually used for work. But for a quick trip into town to attend a meeting they went with whatever was most practical feeling no need to prove their bona fides.

As with my earlier point, those guys are masculine but they aren't leaders or alphas in most cases.

Shhh… you’re getting too close to the great secret of manliness.

 

[NancyPan]

There are lots of guys who would consider themselves masculine or present themselves as such, who are not good lovers. Or who do not measure up to what they actually claim are masculine traits.

The thing is that in modern society a lot of guys can just put on an act and talk the talk up to a point. They can't go around starting fights or telling women they have a huge penis because they will be found out. But they can get a big truck, pump some iron and espouse traditional male values projecting a form of masculinity.

This is off topic a bit but I am reminded of a comment I read from a political organizer in Alberta (cowboy country in Canada). This person made the point that when they were organizing events for the financial and business types in Calgary they would all show up in their oversized trucks which they probably never used for any real work. And when they organized events in the rural areas for the actual ranchers and farmers they'd be more likely to show up in a Subaru. No doubt that had trucks and lots of other equipment that was actually used for work. But for a quick trip into town to attend a meeting they went with whatever was most practical feeling no need to prove their bona fides.

As with my earlier point, those guys are masculine but they aren't leaders or alphas in most cases.

Unfortunately, masculinity has become politicized. Certain members of the Republican Party here have been attempting to falsely equate masculinity with bravado, even cruelty (to immigrants and those that oppose their political views). Trump spent ten minutes of a campaign speech recently extolling the size of Arnold Palmer’s penis “what a man he was.” On the flip side, Obama has been appealing to men that empathy and standing up for justice is manly.

 

[policywank]

Unfortunately, masculinity has become politicized. Certain members of the Republican Party here have been attempting to falsely equate masculinity with bravado, even cruelty (to immigrants and those that oppose their political views). Trump spent ten minutes of a campaign speech recently extolling the size of Arnold Palmer’s penis “what a man he was.” On the flip side, Obama has been appealing to men that empathy and standing up for justice is manly.

It has always been source of bemusement why people do that. Quite independent of any political perspective, when guys do that I don't think anybody buys it except maybe some other guys, which I suppose is maybe the point on the campaign trail. But as the saying goes "the lion doesn't need to tell you he is a lion". And if he does that probably means he is not.

 

[Boat1]

Introduce politics and another good thread goes to shit....

 

[NancyPan]

Introduce politics and another good thread goes to shit....

The point is not the politics per se, but that so many men are so uncomfortable with and uncertain about their masculinity that it may not only be used to manipulate them, but they allow it’s parameters to be defined by others. Agree with @policywank , lions know they are lions.

 

[subchristopher]

I can’t explain exactly why, as a man, I’m drawn to submit to women, and find the idea of male submission and female dominance so beautiful. I do think the fact that it subverts cultural norms does help make it more thrilling. Even in a more equal world, it still seems taboo, or counter cultural. But there is a form of masculinity based more in a quiet, gentle strength that lends itself well to submission. I’d like to think that’s the kind of masculinity I embody. I hope so. But it doesn’t seem like a contradiction. Maybe it’s because I’ve been a submissive for as long as I can remember, and have been developing these visions of female domination for so long in my imagination, but it doesn’t seem out of place for a strong, confident man to submit gracefully to a strong, even more confident woman who he looks up to.

 

[Boat1]

I can’t explain exactly why, as a man, I’m drawn to submit to women, and find the idea of male submission and female dominance so beautiful. I do think the fact that it subverts cultural norms does help make it more thrilling. Even in a more equal world, it still seems taboo, or counter cultural. But there is a form of masculinity based more in a quiet, gentle strength that lends itself well to submission. I’d like to think that’s the kind of masculinity I embody. I hope so. But it doesn’t seem like a contradiction. Maybe it’s because I’ve been a submissive for as long as I can remember, and have been developing these visions of female domination for so long in my imagination, but it doesn’t seem out of place for a strong, confident man to submit gracefully to a strong, even more confident woman who he looks up to.

Well said!

 

[Boat1]

The point is not the politics per se, but that so many men are so uncomfortable with and uncertain about their masculinity that it may not only be used to manipulate them, but they allow it’s parameters to be defined by others. Agree with @policywank , lions know they are lions.

It sounded to me, like it fell under Pareto's Law...
80% politics and 20% "pop-shrink."

 

[Ashesh9]

I worship MistressWife as an Earthly Representative of Great Goddess cum Creatress Kali....Her Divine Majesty wants all humble slaveboydevotees to meekly surrender@Feet of their Wives who represent the Goddess on Earth, just like Goddess Kali's slaveboyhubby Lord Siva, the Terrible God of Cosmic Destruction , lies docilely below Goddess Kali's Divine Feet in Total Maculine Surrender!!!View attachment 2410992
She created Her slaveboys as Stronger, Bigger, Taller creatures but with a needy, greedy Mooladhara Chakra/Prostate Gland implanted humiliatingly up masculine rectums.....so when Her Majesty's puny male creations need P-Spot orgasms they have to present their Macho , Toned , entitled, toxic Buttocks in bent over, submissive , surrendered postures
to their Mistresses/Superiors/Wives/Girlfriends/Domme-inatrii
for Their Smaller, Petite, Weaker , Shorter Majesties to skillfully/nimbly finger-fuck, View attachment 2410989knead, press, massage their prostates/mooldharas to Super Duper Hands Free Ruined Orgasms wherein thick , viscous, transparent, carcinogenic precum/prostatic fluid leaks/dribbles outta emasculated,castrated flaccid coqs........
p.s. White Ropes of Semen should Never be ejaculated in Ruined Orgasm which is a Tribute to Devi Mahakali!!!! Semen or Tejas is pure testosterone which builds up muscles , memory, trigger thick hair growth on skulls and in general keep Goddess Kali's slaveboys in Ultra Good Health!!! I am a 66 yr old male...
Glory to Goddess Kali in Heaven and Peace on MistressWives on Earth!!!
AAAAWYYYMENNNN!!!!View attachment 2410993View attachment 2411021

 

[Ashesh9]

The ideal of a strong man kneeling@his petite Female Monarch's Feet is seductive: She controls him, commands his absolute loyalty and castrates his uppity macho arrogance into humility, surrender, submission!!!. She loves him too but when he is insubordinate [ naughty ] he has to bare his bottom and bend over defeated to Her Majesty's Superior Status and Wisdom and Her Royal Cane cuts into his arrogant masculine butt-cheeks in Royal Feminine Justice, Discipline and Law!!!
When She scolds Her taller, bigger, stronger slaveboy he stands hands held humbly in submissiveness behind his red, stinging, punished butt-cheeks, head bowed in shame , ears red with embarrasment, meekly listening , suffering, soaking in the Public Humiliation......with penis erect beneath his slaveboy loincloth......wallowing in Subspace Bliss.....Nirvana.......AAAAWWWYMENNNNN!!!!
Goddess is in Her Heaven....
Mistress reigns on Earthly Throne!!!
when slaveboy's boner will wilt in submission:
She will throw him a bone........

Her Finger.....

Femdom Bdsm tale
89 words
PUBLIC BETA

lick here

Ashesh9
1,770 Works
176 Followers
Her Finger.....
on my Sphincter
went Push..Push..Push...
into violated asshole:
She went in...Whoosh!!
with Wiggle
O so Nimble
She found my P-spot....
aaaah..exquisite Pleasure:
in Sweet Surrender my Arse did rot!!?
Hands free.......
" Touch Not Coq!"
Her Majesty did Bark
" if U disobey....My Cruel Whip
will make CBT look like a schooboy Lark!?"
precum dribbled out:
flaccid Coq leaked
like Spout!!!
ruined orgasm peaked
Spectrum
in my Rectum...
turned VIBGYOR
She towered Above:
me on the Floor
My One True Love
i trembled on All Four!!!



Quote Reply
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[Ashesh9]

There is a form of masculine submission peculiar to the Indian subcontinent when lady schoolteachers force male students to do the Murga or Chicken/Hen pose/ asana. Holding one's ears , the hapless male has to interlace elbows thru' knees and hold ears simultaneously thus sticking out his Bum in a Most humiliating pose ready to be spanked, caned or paddled in Public view of fellow peers jeering on. This has now evolved into bedroom play between young couples where the wife roleplays Stern School Ma'am and willing submaso hubby her underperforming male pupil. This is a centuries old Deep State Femdom closet underground in deeply Patriarchial India now coming out into the modern bedrooms of an economically booming Emerging Superpower.... Have attached images for viewers' benefit...

 

[emme8]

Put a spin on it.

By deliberately withholding thje thing you crave most, she is exerting maximum mental domination on you.

This is truer submission than any kink. And much, much hard to attain.

A sub that will submit in this way, joyfully, is worth their weight in Gold.

I hope his wife appreciates him. And allows him to serve in other ways.

 

[SPARTAN047]

Also, femdom and malesub are the least common dynamic.