Makes me wince!

[Guest]

Sometimes I hear or read a phrase that makes me wince. I am not highlighting bad grammar, rather the combination of words that has me locking my knees together.

I know that most of these phrases will be gender dependent, but what are the phrases for you?

My number one is "popped her cherry".

Popping anything during sex just seems painful.

What are y'all's?

b

 

[jfinn]

The one that drives me crazy is "member". I don't care if it's turgid, throbbing, pulsing or doing the hokey pokey, all I can think of is what club does this club belong to that it gets to be designated a member?

Jayne

 

[Guest]

This has been said somewhere else but I particularly do not care for the literary use* of pre-cum. Too yuppy or proper.

Perdita

*as opposed to actual usage.

 

[gauchecritic]

The one that drives me crazy is "member". I don't care if it's turgid, throbbing, pulsing or doing the hokey pokey, all I can think of is what club does this club belong to that it gets to be designated a member?

Jayne

Eeeooow TURGID

Gauche

 

[LorriLove]

hiya

the old favourite, "oh god i'm cumming" she cried / he cried, never said it or heard it yet in real life and i've been about a bit.

yes perdita darling, pre-cum, what the freek is that, it either cum's or it don't where men are concerned.
gets a bit dribbly sometimes before hand, but that's nature's assistance with lubrication surely.

well must go play with hubby's throbbing member, giggle.

 

[Guest]

Re: hiya

well must go play with hubby's throbbing member, giggle.

Hurry up so you don't miss the pre-cum.

 

[SuperDot69]

for some reason, the phrase that disturbs me is "love box". I can't explain it....I realized it the other day when hubby and I were writing a hot lil' story back & forth and he used that phrase. It just grates on my nerves!

 

[MathGirl]

Errrrgghhh........

"manhood"
MG

 

[Quasimodem]

. . . My number one is "popped her cherry". . .

In a character's mouth, any term is legitimate, provided it is in that character's nature and vocabulary.

In narration, unless the narrator is supposed to be chronologically, or mentally, a seventeen-year-old addressing his mates, a better term is undoubtedly required.

What would you prefer to a turgid member, a flaccid dick?

 

[MlledeLaPlumeBleu]

Negative trigger words to me are things that evoke a bad or humorous connotation in the reader's mind that takes them away from the eroticism of the story.

For me this would involve anything I may have heard in junior high, up to and including: dong, dork, johnson, meatstick, man-bat, humping, twat, muff, boobs, boner, hooters, rod, and stupid euphemisms like "purple-crested cycloptic love cockatoo" et al.

I also don't relish unfortunate verbs and adjectives, such as "sloppy" or "panting". Who wants to read about a "sloppy pussy"? And panting, since I have pitbulls, always makes me think of dogs- and dogs act retarded and jump around all giddy- and presto! Instantly unsexy.

A big one- any attempts to cuten, apocopate or "hip up" the female genitalia and accoutrements- i.e. "clitty", "puss", "cunny", "titties", "boobies".
Catch phrases are for products- "the web", "J.Lo". Not anatomy.

However, I'm sure a lot of the words I'm ok with don't work for some people. I used to really cringe at the word "panties". Now I just smile feebly and go to a happy place.

mlle

 

[SuperDot69]

hubby doesn't like "bum". he says why not just call it an ass?

 

[gauchecritic]

hubby doesn't like "bum". he says why not just call it an ass?

Mainly because an ass is a donkey.

Gauche

 

[Guest]

I love bum and arse (learned from UK hubby). Ass = burro.

 

[LorriLove]

wooooooooooooooo

jeez gauche, really, i just read about some guy fucking his wife's donkey then, wooooooooo!!!!!!!


giggle!!!

 

[MathGirl]

"purple-crested cycloptic love cockatoo"

Oh, I love that one!
MG

 

[Guest]

I used to really cringe at the word "panties". Now I just smile feebly and go to a happy place.

Bella, will you take me there? pleeezze

 

[MlledeLaPlumeBleu]

//"-turgid member or flaccid cock?"//

Anything is better than the 2nd person grimace-off I read last night! This guy kept using the words "limp cock" over and over- as if it was a good thing-!

(paraphrasing)

"You take my limp cock in you're hands, moaning ahhhhhhhhh ohhhhhhhhhh goddddddd yesssssssss and your so turned on by the feel of my cock that you orgasm all over the place. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh yessssssss mmmmmmmm my pet I say as I diddle your clitty, playing with your sloppy pussy. You start slurping my limp cock going yessssss and I'm cu cummmmming- sucking on mylimp cock and humping my fingers."

I also hate it when people feel compelled to use "orgasm" as a verb.

-"And she orgasmed, all over the (chaise longue, hammock, tea service, antimaccassar) "I'm going to orgasm!" she screamed!
MMMmmmmmMMMMmmmAAAAaaaaOooooooooYesssssssssssss....erk

I really should stop reading on spec.

 

[MlledeLaPlumeBleu]

LOL.

Trova, you ARE the happy place!

 

[gauchecritic]

Will you two get a room.

Gauche

 

[MlledeLaPlumeBleu]

Annoying isn't it?

 

[Guest]

Will you two get a room.

You had your chance, Yorkshireman.

 

[gauchecritic]

No I didn't, I'm across the atlantic.

Gauche

 

[Guest]

No I didn't, I'm across the atlantic.

You are so Mr. Cuppa-half-empty (I get over there once a year.)

(so what's the great deal? I'm home.)

 

[Vincent E]

This has been said somewhere else but I particularly do not care for the literary use* of pre-cum. Too yuppy or proper.

Ditto. But just because it is an incredibly stupid word.

"Yeah, yeah baby. Oh, I'm pre-cumming. Yeah, I can feel myself pre-cumming."

 

[Guest]

Then there's post-cum; or maybe post-modern-cum? neo-cum? classical-cum? surreal-cum? ad nauseum-cum?