Mad woman seeks the ultimate depravity.

[VibrantVerbose]

Wanted: Clever, banter-loving person of any gender, for conversation loaded with silliness and free of entitlement. Please have fun playing with words and a working knowledge of and respect for the conventions of orthography, syntax, grammar, and punctuation.

I'm restless at work these days, and I'd love to distract myself a bit by learning about someone new. Or several someones, I'm not not greedy. I'm just looking for conversation, not cyber, etc.; if that doesn't suit you please try a different advert. Discussion of sex is not out of the question, but it's not guaranteed, and it won't be cyber.

About me: I'm a fire-breathing fish from outer space, and I'm here because of reasons. I can't play the piano, but my bathtub is very clean. I enjoy bright nail varnish, long walks across the room, and orange juice. Earlier today I slew an Archaeoptryx and Dali the Four Clawed Lobster, and sold the meat to Mutated Munchies. I lie like a Cardassian: with flair, and never the same lie twice. That's a lie.

Wouldn't you like a conversation with me?

 

[Kozuka]

Wanted: Clever, banter-loving person of any gender, for conversation loaded with silliness and free of entitlement. Please have fun playing with words and a working knowledge of and respect for the conventions of orthography, syntax, grammar, and punctuation.

I'm restless at work these days, and I'd love to distract myself a bit by learning about someone new. Or several someones, I'm not not greedy. I'm just looking for conversation, not cyber, etc.; if that doesn't suit you please try a different advert. Discussion of sex is not out of the question, but it's not guaranteed, and it won't be cyber.

About me: I'm a fire-breathing fish from outer space, and I'm here because of reasons. I can't play the piano, but my bathtub is very clean. I enjoy bright nail varnish, long walks across the room, and orange juice. Earlier today I slew an Archaeoptryx and Dali the Four Clawed Lobster, and sold the meat to Mutated Munchies. I lie like a Cardassian: with flair, and never the same lie twice. That's a lie.

Wouldn't you like a conversation with me?

Wow. Quite the entertaining read--you sound like a very intriguing person, lol. +3 cool points

 

[RuneBlade]

Well, art is art, isn't it?

Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now, you tell me what you know.

 

[VibrantVerbose]

Well, art is art, isn't it?

Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now, you tell me what you know.

Here's what I know:

Three teaspoons make a tablespoon. One saucepan makes a space helmet. Two snakebite kit suckers make one interesting toy. Infinite science fiction books make paradise.

To those who have responded to my advertisement about a 1973 Volkswagen van: I do not have a 1973 Volkswagen van, or a 1973 anything for that matter. I do have a 1972 casserole dish which I'd be willing to part with for one million US dollars, but for your 1973 Volkswagen van needs I'm afraid you must look elsewhere.

 

[troubledone]

Here's what I know:

Three teaspoons make a tablespoon. One saucepan makes a space helmet. Two snakebite kit suckers make one interesting toy. Infinite science fiction books make paradise.

To those who have responded to my advertisement about a 1973 Volkswagen van: I do not have a 1973 Volkswagen van, or a 1973 anything for that matter. I do have a 1972 casserole dish which I'd be willing to part with for one million US dollars, but for your 1973 Volkswagen van needs I'm afraid you must look elsewhere.

I have a 1912 vibrator that is powered by three horses , any interest ?

 

[VibrantVerbose]

I have a 1912 vibrator that is powered by three horses , any interest ?

I prefer to look to the future where sex toys are concerned: steam power is where it's at!

And by it, of course, I mean the world's sexual orifices.

Not the people in the world, mind. The sexual orifices of the planet itself. They fucking love steam powered sex toys, let me tell you. (No? Too late; I already told you.)

 

[troubledone]

I prefer to look to the future where sex toys are concerned: steam power is where it's at!

And by it, of course, I mean the world's sexual orifices.

Not the people in the world, mind. The sexual orifices of the planet itself. They fucking love steam powered sex toys, let me tell you. (No? Too late; I already told you.)

One always thought solar and wind power was the choice source energy in the days to cum

Now you may blame me for being coarse

 

[Passthebeer]

I prefer to look to the future where sex toys are concerned: steam power is where it's at!

And by it, of course, I mean the world's sexual orifices.

Not the people in the world, mind. The sexual orifices of the planet itself. They fucking love steam powered sex toys, let me tell you. (No? Too late; I already told you.)

Steam will always be the choice of the enlightened. When I was at the 1920 we old fair and the first steam powered tablet was introduced they scoffed at it and said it would never be popular but guess what I'm typing on now. Steam will always be the key

 

[VibrantVerbose]

Steam will always be the choice of the enlightened. When I was at the 1920 we old fair and the first steam powered tablet was introduced they scoffed at it and said it would never be popular but guess what I'm typing on now. Steam will always be the key

Even my tea kettle is steam powered!

That's a lie. I haven't got a teakettle. I have to make do with a woolly jumper and a bit of napalm.

 

[MacGuffinn]

I converse with bees, play obscure board games and drink beer from either the largest growler or smallest pony recepticle. I enjoy identifying voice actors, reading grafitti and frequent sexual congress. All of the above is true, to some degree. Enjoy your exploration of Lit.

 

[ConstantineIII]

Wanted: Clever, banter-loving person of any gender, for conversation loaded with silliness and free of entitlement. Please have fun playing with words and a working knowledge of and respect for the conventions of orthography, syntax, grammar, and punctuation.

I'm restless at work these days, and I'd love to distract myself a bit by learning about someone new. Or several someones, I'm not not greedy. I'm just looking for conversation, not cyber, etc.; if that doesn't suit you please try a different advert. Discussion of sex is not out of the question, but it's not guaranteed, and it won't be cyber.

About me: I'm a fire-breathing fish from outer space, and I'm here because of reasons. I can't play the piano, but my bathtub is very clean. I enjoy bright nail varnish, long walks across the room, and orange juice. Earlier today I slew an Archaeoptryx and Dali the Four Clawed Lobster, and sold the meat to Mutated Munchies. I lie like a Cardassian: with flair, and never the same lie twice. That's a lie.

Wouldn't you like a conversation with me?

My mother made me mull over the concept of always avoiding alliteration, but I do like the way that your syntax makes me feel.

 

[JustaGuy3]

Ah nice, versions of the steam punk variations of the sci-fi genre. The ornithopters of John Carter and the antics of Lazarus Long come to mind along with a certain unnamed occupant of a blue police box.

 

[mike_confident]

I'm out of order? You're out of order. This whole frick'n forum's out of order. You want some grammar? You can handle proper grammar. Cause when you reach over into a pile of goo, that used to be your best friend's face; forget it Vibrant, it's Chinatown!

 

[Simone808619]

Nice Jack Nicholson homage. . Thank god for a new and fun thread!!

 

[troubledone]

Did the thread go astray

 

[reallyunsure]

Infinite science fiction books make paradise.

Until your glasses break.

 

[VibrantVerbose]

Until your glasses break.

...I think you're using glasses wrong.

 

[RuneBlade]

Until your glasses break.

Great episode.

 

[NiceNastyMann]

Ah nice, versions of the steam punk variations of the sci-fi genre. The ornithopters of John Carter and the antics of Lazarus Long come to mind along with a certain unnamed occupant of a blue police box.

Sigh...

John Carter - I can sort of understand being in the steam punk genre but! he pre-dates it... maybe the ultimate genotype of it in a way.

LL? Oh lord, the wraith of RAH will hunt you down and teach you manners in whatever afterlife you will inhabit.

Lensman. Now that is a better Golden Age type, right after John Carter. In his Grey Leathers...

Or Marc DuQuesne? There is a worthy enemy - he'd teach your blue police box wanker a thing or two...

 

[VibrantVerbose]

I'm in the mood for some conversation. Anyone else in a similar frame of mind?

 

[ConstantineIII]

I'm in the mood for some conversation. Anyone else in a similar frame of mind?

Would love to if you are still around.

 

[VibrantVerbose]

More Facts About Me!

In case there are any weekend-banter-seeking people about who just aren't sure yet whether I'm the answer to their conversational fantasies, here are more facts about me!

1. I keep a candy jar full of poisoned spider eggs, to keep me from eating any. It is not always effective.
2. I believe in violence. It's a real thing, don't try to deny it!
3. I'm a robot from the future, and I want you to live. (That's a lie; I'm a deranged fish from the past, and I've just taken out life insurance on you.)
4. I once used an entire can of air freshener outdoors. I am not ashamed.
5. Today I am perched atop a bookcase with a laptop, violating the Prime Directive.

Wouldn't you like to go on adventures with me? Well, you probably would, but tough shit. Instead, I'm offering some conversations with me, which is nearly almost not quite as amazing!

 

[southerncharm77]

PM sent

 

[VibrantVerbose]

Once again seeking that most unusual of pleasures, conversation.

I assure you I'm a most competent interlocutor! I have opinions on many subjects! The best colour! The best number! The best food plant! The best flower plant! The best secret weapon-manufacturing plant! The best double agent government plant!

I also like to ask questions. How are you? What is your name? How long have you been working for the Alliance, spy??

So if you are ridiculously clever and cleverly ridiculous, you should send me a message. What's the worst that can happen?*


*Never ask that, especially aloud, or you'll get sucked into my whirlpool of dangerous and wacky hijinks.

 

[free_and_easy]

Live this thread! Makes a nice change...