M/F couple seeking W. European F sub for on-line double domming play

[Mindfondler]

Some readers may have seen my recent personals advert on a similar topic (as quoted later below).

My wife and I haven't yet been able to find a local (London UK) female sub for real-life BDSM play with us. We are therefore widening our geographical search to seek a lady sub for on-line conversation and, if it feels right, on-line play (with us "double domming").

As a starting point, I'd like to specify the following requirements for our prospective sub:

• Heterosexual/bisexual female with submissive tendencies
• Preferred age: 18 to 45 (as we'd find it odd to dominate someone older)
• In a similar time zone to the UK (i.e. in Western Europe) for easier real-time interaction (e.g. IM chat)
• Able to hold conversations in English
• No need for any prior experience in a submissive role

We'd like to reassure everyone that we'll treat any replies to this advert with the greatest respect. If you get in touch, declaring yourself as having submissive tendencies, then my wife and I will only take that as an invitation to have a relaxed, "no obligations" chat with you. Over time, we'll all aim to get to know each other, understand what makes us all "tick", and agree whether we want to take things any further. In particular, there will be no immediate commands of "on your knees!" (or worse).

Why would you wish to get in touch? My wife and I believe that we're kind, caring and good fun to be with! We've been active together in the UK BDSM community for one year now, and we've learnt a lot about its values and practices, including the critical need for strong trust and open communication. I believe that we're both now well respected in that community. My wife and I recognise that we both still have a lot to learn, but we now feel ready to do that in conjunction with others. We believe that someone who takes a submissive role with us will teach us just as much as we can teach them, and that we'll all enjoy learning and growing together.

I hope that the above sets out a good impression of whom we're seeking and what we'd like to achieve. Please do get in touch if you're interested. I'll be happy to answer any questions, either by PM or in this thread.

Thanks for reading!

MF (and Mrs MF)

M/F couple (London, UK) seeking local platonic F sub for double domming play

I've posted this in my Fetlife profile, but I thought it was worth replicating here as well.

For the last year, my wife and I (married for 20+ years) have been exploring our newly-discovered kinky sides. We play together regularly, but we're finding that our BDSM roles don't fully complement each other. We're therefore seeking a local platonic female sub so that we can extend our play repertoire to double domming.

By "platonic", I mean that we're not seeking polyamory/polyfuckery. We believe that it's possible for a D/s dynamic to be worthwhile and fulfilling without having to be sexual. That needn't limit our modes of play too much, as long as we all remain comfortable with what we're doing. I'd imagine that rope, impact, wax, electricity, sensual and psychological play are all possibilities (as are others).

We're therefore open to interest from local subs (in or around London, UK) along those lines. We're not in any hurry, though. We're seeking quality rather than quantity, and we're not expecting snap decisions. We believe that a suitable arrangement is most likely to evolve from face-to-face meetings over time, perhaps at local kink community events.

See also our earlier personals posting here.

Please do get in touch if you're interested. I'll be happy to answer any questions, either by PM or in this thread.

Thanks for reading!

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[Mindfondler]

Please may I ask a small favour of those reading my advert above (whether or not it applies to you)? I'd love to hear how I could improve it so as to encourage suitable potential takers to come forward.

Personals ads are tricky to construct as they're "cold" approaches. For the writer who is heavily invested in the content, it's difficult to assess their impact in advance and it's rare to receive any review feedback (apart from radio silence!). It's possible that something that I've tried to put across sincerely might comes across unintentionally as smug, uncaring, ignorant or worse. It's also conceivable that word blindness has led me to omit some vital piece of information, without which no sane reader would consider replying to the advert.

If anyone would be prepared to offer constructive criticism (whether by PM or in this thread), then I'm listening!

Thanks for any thoughts.

MF (and Mrs MF)

P.S. Of course, I accept that it's also possible that my advert is clear but nobody out there is interested in it!
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