love letter (closed)

[milfhunter23]

From you’re loving and adoring cousin Buenaventura Castillo Dear Ascéncion y Rimerioit has been to long since we last dined at you’re fathers estate. I did mean to write but events of late have taken all of my time and it has been many moons since I have been able to put pen to paper. My heart lays open and bleeding for the freedom loving peoples of the world foremost the people of my beloved home land. I have missed you in my long absence in France but this absence has only grown the love I felt for you. I find that when ever I rest a moment free from the just cause of I am again arrested by the beauty of nature.

Though this pales in memory to you’re own beauty as fleeting as it is done a further injustice by you’re portrait. You may find it perverse that I speak of you’re beauty not as a blood kin but as a man to a woman. But it is not just you’re beauty but you’re dagger sharp wit that captivates my attention. After many a long day writing poetic pleas to the masses I have found my nights stolen by visions of you Ascencion. Honor what is this they call me a coward and my Spanish blood boils. That I am safe in a castle well other spill there courage on the field of men.

I wish to meet to talk to touch to hold you in my arms I can not let god or country stand in my way. If you would turn away if you would show me pity it would crush me like nothing has. I know you favor the crown but I can not let that stop us I can not let you’re traditions come between what is what must be. I have long been interested in poetry though my pen often lies to me. So the French have made use of me when they find the need to use the letter of the law. I plead with them to allow me to prove my honor on the battlefield or halls of politics.

But time and again I am told to behave to wait my time so that I may serve the needs but what of my needs. What of my need to be loved to be touched to have my words heard to have my heart lifted for it has become heavy. Like a doll I am dressed and pampered as always but I have learned to appreciate these things not for there sake but for how they make people look at me. In my many walks and dances I have gained both form and style. I know I embarrassed you when I was a child in the way I would hide behind my books. Or I would harshly treat my servants having them form a puddle of clean mud in the stairway.

But I can it hide it anymore my feeling child like when we first met I knew you were the one. Time and again things took me away from you when ever you looked at another man I fumed and would thrash him. If you have any of these feelings I must know I have always valued honesty over kindness and you’re opinion most of all. If you do please send me back a letter for I shall not be able to return home for some time as I am needed here. I am in the progress of giving many there just rewards for a lifetime spent depriving people of there proper place. You’re faithful and devoted cousin and admirer Buenaventura Castillo paining to see you.

 

[Lady_Mornington]

 

[milfhunter23]

Dear cousin

I will not can not abandon my principles what kind of man would sacrifice all that he is for generations of dust. Are living country must take presidency over generation of tradition and stupidity. Can you forget you’re own treatment you’re own silence when anywhere but home. I know you want me to support the crown but I can not I can not support fools I can not support decay and I can not support old ideas. As for those in France you judge them to harshly, but it will be we with Spanish blood that plan the future of Spain.

As for my love it does not weaken it is not lust many times have I had the chance to exercise these desires. Long have I rejected this to the chagrin of my fellow liberators who mock me. I have as often thought about are long walks and intensive talks as I have thought of the lengthening lines of you’re body. To think that you credit me with so little confusing lust with love hurts me. I am no child unfamiliar with the desires of the body and longings of the heart.

My cause is just each day many of the Spanish homeland and abroad show there devotion to are cause. Can you not here the people in the streets shouting there support or are the walls of yore castles so high as to deafen them. I know that I am just I know that I am right and my mind my soul is to the people of my land. Once are people the royalty the aristocracy were deemed worthy of the people. Now we hid in our estates and watch the world go around.

Can you not tell me you have not as well longed for us to throw of the shackles of history and enter a brave new world. Were a man is not judged by his blood but by his will not by the contents of his wallet but the content of his mind. Wealth or family should not be the measure of a man or woman. It saddens me to think that the best you could be is a wife even if you were my wife. I know you can be so much more I want to share the entirety of my home and not just my home and bed.

Do not throw of my love so quickly I need you to support me napoleon will not be thrown back by the shield of tradition. We must meet I must tell you show you of my conviction my heart and mind are not so easily swayed or won. But you must know that my words have weight so much weight I do not write them lightly. When my pen touches paper men die men loose al freedom and hope. I know that I need to convince you of my conviction but I can wait but not forever.

I will continue to be you’re one and only trusted confident you’re one and only confessor

Buenaventura Castillo

 

[Lady_Mornington]

 

[milfhunter23]

Dear cousin
I have been long from home banished for speaking out against the tyrants you praise who have done nothing to protect are people. Perhaps I have been wrong not in my goals but my choice of allies. I now have seen such acts the church we prayed in looted at burned I pray for the salvation of all souls involved. Perhaps i have been a fool believing the lies like poisons fed to me. But these are the time that try men‘s souls and have not all Spaniards fallen short.

If napoleon is such a tyrant should not have god struck him dead or a Spanish ball found his heart. I say then that I listen every day for this shot to quiet the beating of my own heart yet no shot comes and non will. But I must see you to show me the world through you’re eyes. Take dagger or pistol or nothing at all I will be for a time in city of Cartagena on Costa Calida in south-eastern Spain. I know not the results of my actions but I have kept liberty and justice in my heart.

You may only see what is on the front but I see the width and the breadth of the liberation maybe we have already lost are way. If only you could see what I have seen then you would know the depths of suffering of all peoples. You who have known not a day of hunger or cold. I have seen these things filth streets humans rendered down to feed the need of the cities master. I have seen the piece of the country and can no longer close my eyes.

But I must not ignore the evils of the French the armies on both sides have become a raving mob. Suffering death is what they bring if I could but raise my hands against them I would not hesitate. I know you once had feelings for me are embraces and soft kisses to the cheek or head attest to more them familiar love. But if you’re heart for me is grown so cold then plunge into it a dagger. I wait for some response a letter a meeting for some sign you still care.

You’re foolish countryman
Buenaventura Castillo

 

[Lady_Mornington]

 

[milfhunter23]

April 17 AH 1808
Dear cousin

Better the tyrant you know then the tyrant you do not there is talk of the napoleon placing a puppet king on the thrown perhaps a favored relative or a toddy that will speak for the great god kin. A fool I have been to see in the man what I wished to be an don’t what was there. I can not believe that he would trample over are kingdom leaving footprints like an uninvited guest. Further more he has turned on us are salary has been suspended and I have been forced to pawn a few items to stay in proper dress.

When the godless ones came to take my precious rosary during prayer of all times I lost my head. Grabbing a letter opener I cut the young mans throat and stuck the fat police man like a pig through the heart. Blood trickled down my hands staining you’re rosary for this and nothing more I ask you to forgive me. I was then placed in my room and locked up when I was caught in the study sipping wine. If not for a bribe I would not be able to write I am still unsure if this will find you at all.

I have spent my time reading the rags that pass for news in this area and it makes my hear heavy. I should escape with some rebel well they call themselves that others like myself and French officer passed over for promotion. I do not know how I fell so far as for god I always believed he existed. It is so much he created the universe then instilling upon us morels allowed us to rule this realm. Perhaps today men are not ready to rule themselves but some day we must be ready.

I am sorry for my curtness but all mail can not be trusted praying to write you again you’re rebel in training Buenaventura Castillo

 

[Lady_Mornington]

 

[milfhunter23]

Dear cousin

I have just embarked on the majesties ship warspite it is a fine ship even if the crew be nothing more then riff raff. I know that I will see you soon I am helping are allies in anyway I can. What I have seen will allow them to draw maps that may one day free our country. But I will not shirk from my duties I will return and fight the French if only to see you again. The keepsakes have become most treasured and give me piece of mind allowing me to sleep at night.

I will try to contact you again I can only hope that are allies prove to be as strong and loyal as we need. I have not given up and hope to enter the law and punish theses criminals. The war will end someday and the vile monsters will be brought to justice sooner or later. If I have to I will take back are land with cannon with musket and saber any weapon. I will long for the day when we can be together I know you may not feel the way I do but I love you I love you with all my heart Louisa
I will be worth of you’re love.

Signed a simple soldier for freedom
Buenaventura Castillo