Loud Eaters: A Question

[Felix_Jones]

I was raised to eat with my mouth closed. I guess the point is to make as few offending noises as you're consuming your three squares. The old guy in the cube next to mine very obviously does not subscribe to this bit of etiquette. What's your take? Smacking, slurping, belching and generally eating like you've just pulled up to a trough makes my skin crawl, and if I was not such a gentlemen would engender some very violent feelings. How about you?

 

[Aurantica]

Noisy eaters drive me ballistic. Ever had to eat with one of those people that bang their cutlery around like the plate is a drum? Some of my family does that and it's extremely annoying. Sometimes I dread spaghetti night, its like eating with a bunch of pigs. And how the hell are you supposed to tell them to STFU without sounding condescending? To be quite honest, I think noisy eaters were raised by people who didnt care how they acted. Certainly it lowers my opinion of someone.

Any tips for enduring a meal with such boors?

 

[r_baby]

I totally agree.... loud chewing and drinking makes my skin crawl and stresses me out. I really wish it didn't... if there was a shot or something I could take to make me not notice, I'd totally do it so I didn't feel like strangling someone if they're chewing gum loudly next to me!

 

[Miles Long]

Noisy eaters drive me ballistic. Ever had to eat with one of those people that bang their cutlery around like the plate is a drum? Some of my family does that and it's extremely annoying. Sometimes I dread spaghetti night, its like eating with a bunch of pigs. And how the hell are you supposed to tell them to STFU without sounding condescending? To be quite honest, I think noisy eaters were raised by people who didnt care how they acted. Certainly it lowers my opinion of someone.

Any tips for enduring a meal with such boors?

Sometimes condescension is deserved. If they don't like it they should learn to eat like human beings.

 

[Aurantica]

Sometimes condescension is deserved. If they don't like it they should learn to eat like human beings.

Yeah, but it's not always appropriate. Like when someone is older then you or your boss or related to you.

 

[Miles Long]

I totally agree.... loud chewing and drinking makes my skin crawl and stresses me out. I really wish it didn't... if there was a shot or something I could take to make me not notice, I'd totally do it so I didn't feel like strangling someone if they're chewing gum loudly next to me!

There is a shot you can take for that, it's called a snakebite. Mix 2 oz Yukon Jack liqueur and a dash of lime juice. Take a few of those shots and you won't notice loud eaters anymore.... You're welcome.

 

[warl0ck1]

I used to be a noisy eater clicking utensils and such but one of my friends fathers cured me of it at 16. I do catch myself humming when I eat every once and a while if I really enjoy what I'm eating.

 

[Aurantica]

I used to be a noisy eater clicking utensils and such but one of my friends fathers cured me of it at 16. I do catch myself humming when I eat every once and a while if I really enjoy what I'm eating.

How'd he do that? Was it tactful?

 

[Corbal]

I was raised to eat with my mouth closed. I guess the point is to make as few offending noises as you're consuming your three squares. The old guy in the cube next to mine very obviously does not subscribe to this bit of etiquette. What's your take? Smacking, slurping, belching and generally eating like you've just pulled up to a trough makes my skin crawl, and if I was not such a gentlemen would engender some very violent feelings. How about you?

Drives me fucking bananas. There's a woman in my office that eats, slurps, burbs, farts, rinse and fucking repeat. We recently moved into a new building and anyone not in an office were told they could not eat at their desks anymore. I talked to my boss and we agreed she and I needed to make an effort to eat in the breakroom
as well, essentially to be positive examples....although we don't have to.

So, this cow tongued broad sat behind us with soup. Of all fucking things....soup! Slurp, slurp, burpitty burp, she'd rip shit, smack....I took it for about ten minutes then turned around, and proceeded to light her ass up over it. It's rude, crude and obnoxious as fuck. I don't have tolerance for grown ass people that do things like that and lack any type of manners when others are forced to eat with them.

Needless to say, I now eat in my office. Fuck em'

 

[clutch1]

I once had a friend who took a second bite before he swallowed what was already in his mouth. The noise he made was worse than listening to a dog eat, the saliva and food accompanied by his breathing was more than I could stand.
I had to tell him.
I also had a friend that would snap his fingers at a waitress or waiter, I'll never go out to eat with him again.

 

[photoperv]

I know someone that grunts and groans when he eats. It's...kind of terrible. That said, I have a 'condition' that makes my jaw pop when I chew or extend my jaw a certain distance, don't recall the name of it. It drives everyone I eat with crazy.

 

[warl0ck1]

How'd he do that? Was it tactful?

more like painful

 

[Aurantica]

more like painful

uh oh... what'd he do?

 

[Felix_Jones]

Great Answers

Thanks for sharing all. Here's the needling irony for me, I was at an Easter dinner with my family (i.e. parents) recently and they're starting to lose the plot as well. The very same people that grinded silent eating habits into me are now slurping up their food like a couple of sewer vacuums. I have no qualms about pointing it out, but I waited until after the meal. Called her up and told her, gently, over the phone that the way they ate really put me off. Momsy being the sensitive type apologized profusely.

I bet you dollars to doughnuts that come mother's day they'll have forgotten everything and it'll be back to the trough, but hey vigilance, right? I'm glad not to be alone in this, sharing a meal is really one of the great social functions we have. You shouldn't have to lose your appetite during the event.

 

[Felix_Jones]

Drives me fucking bananas. There's a woman in my office that eats, slurps, burbs, farts, rinse and fucking repeat. We recently moved into a new building and anyone not in an office were told they could not eat at their desks anymore. I talked to my boss and we agreed she and I needed to make an effort to eat in the breakroom
as well, essentially to be positive examples....although we don't have to.

So, this cow tongued broad sat behind us with soup. Of all fucking things....soup! Slurp, slurp, burpitty burp, she'd rip shit, smack....I took it for about ten minutes then turned around, and proceeded to light her ass up over it. It's rude, crude and obnoxious as fuck. I don't have tolerance for grown ass people that do things like that and lack any type of manners when others are forced to eat with them.

Needless to say, I now eat in my office. Fuck em'

Exact same thign here, guy in the cube next to mine eats like he was raised in a cave. I've already put the request in for a move, but it's a large sprawling organization so these things take time.

 

[warl0ck1]

uh oh... what'd he do?

back hand just like he did with his kids. I was a utensil clicker on the plate on my teeth. and he hated that. I learned real quick how not to do that.

 

[Aurantica]

back hand just like he did with his kids. I was a utensil clicker on the plate on my teeth. and he hated that. I learned real quick how not to do that.

Yikes...

 

[RandallKinds]

Any tips for enduring a meal with such boors?

Earplugs. Amazingly effective in getting your point across, too.

 

[warl0ck1]

Yikes...

sometimes I think that is what is missing now. kids get away with everything and it is because the parents are not strict enough. on shot is all it took and I found a way to be more quiet. I stole only once. there was no talking back when you knew a "but" would receive a swift response.

 

[Aurantica]

sometimes I think that is what is missing now. kids get away with everything and it is because the parents are not strict enough. on shot is all it took and I found a way to be more quiet. I stole only once. there was no talking back when you knew a "but" would receive a swift response.

Yeah. Many parents do not discipline thier kids firmly enough. I'm totally against hitting a child, but put them in time out, take away privileges, do SOMETHING to make them behave. Once you lay down the law it actually is a lot less stressful.

 

[MrsCCfromRC]

Wow.... soulmates!

People chewing with their mouth open drive me crazy! Like a previous poster said, I too wish it didn't bother me but it's so damn rude!!!

 

[Aurantica]

Earplugs. Amazingly effective in getting your point across, too.

That just might work....

 

[Denny Crane]

And how the hell are you supposed to tell them to STFU without sounding condescending?

Like this...

http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y267/dragns/stfu.jpg


So...it becomes obnoxious and confrontational, but at least you avoided condescending.

 

[Miles Long]

Like this...

http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y267/dragns/stfu.jpg


So...it becomes obnoxious and confrontational, but at least you avoided condescending.

Lol mission accomplished.

 

[k_m_d_]

Somebody I share an office with does this...in the office .